Bless her heart, she does

I paced frantically back and forth, all confidence and swagger gone. This wasn't like the van or the agents. That was easy, I slapped on the equivalent of a 'please, have your way with me' sign and just let them do all the work. I didn't need to worry about opinion or long term consequences. Dean was both a subordinate, and he was someone I wanted to make a good first impression or. Er, a second impression on. My first impression had basically been of an incredibly unlucky pervert that really wanted to jump his bones.

Now I really had a chance to make up for all of that and maybe start something. Or fuck it up tremendously and have him think of me as this weirdo who somehow wound up in a position of power. Which I didn't even earn, I cheated to get into, which meant even that was-!

I stopped and slapped myself once, "Get a hold of yourself Taylor. You're just calling to talk to him. That's all. Don't overthink it. When you over think things you start talking too much and then you don't get to the point because you're stalling and if you're stalling then nothing gets done which stresses you more and aaaaagh I'm doing it again!"

Thump, thump, thump, I knocked my head against my bedroom wall in frustration. I took a deep breath in, and a deep breath out. This wasn't impossible, I could do this. I just had to dial and talk to him, that's all. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the Box sitting on my desk. Maybe I could use one of the stickers, a boost to my nerves so I could talk to him.

Or completely fuck it up and freak him out more. He could see emotions, and he had made it clear that the effect the stickers had on my emotions unnerved him. If I wanted this to go anywhere and not end in a colossal drama fest, I had to talk to him as me, no tricks, no smoke and mirrors to hide myself.

It was rather appropriate that I was literally incapable of wearing clothes, but I didn't appreciate the metaphor. Even if it was true.

I groaned and marched out of my room back downstairs, and dialed his number again. The phone rang once, twice, three times. On the fourth, my nerve cracked and I started to hang up.

Then I heard his voice and froze, "This is Dean."

Oh god, oh fuck.

My heart jumped up into my throat again and I almost choked on it. I managed to squeak out a, "Hi, it's Taylor!" and felt my face turn scarlet. God what was I thinking?!

"Oh, Director." Dean said, interest in his voice, "How can I help you?"

Okay, he hadn't just hung up on me, that was a start.

"I, um...I..." I swallowed and stammered, "I-I thought about your offer. I would like to take you up on it some time!"

He laughed, a sweet gentle thing and I bit my lip hard. "Alright. How about tomorrow at noon, if you're not busy? We could catch a movie, go to lunch, or walk in the park..."

He trailed off and I realized he was waiting for me to respond. I spoke without thinking. "Park. Yes. That is good, yes. Which one?"

"There's a nice one by the Boardwalk. I'll meet you there?"

"...Yes." I was trembling so bad.

"Sweet, I'll see you then."

"Y-yeah..." I stammered and hung up.

I did it.