Andrew explains the truth (content warning: suicide attempt)

“I’M NOT A GIRL, OKAY?!!”, Andrew screamed at his mother, who literally gasped and held her mouth in shock.

Like a torrent, Andrew blurted out his truth, garbled between sobs, groans, meanders and vocal raises, appearing as though a raving lunatic.

He tried to go through everything, how he was trying to escape an **** when he was carolled into a makeover by some overzealous women who treated him like their own private dress-up doll, how he had just wanted to cheer Brian up but fell into a tailspin of depravity and false-sincerity, providing sexual relief against his desires, and how he planned to be done with it all already, but Charlene’s false impressions and tortuous punishments had pushed him further along the path to Andrea.

He was not, nor ever would be, a girl.

Charlene had fallen completely silent, her face ashen and eyes unblinking with an unrecognizable emotion.

Andrew ran off crying to his room and slammed the door shut before throwing himself onto his bed and screaming into his pillow.

Without a word, Charlene left the kitchen, heading straight for the liquor cabinet where she grabbed a bottle of bourbon and proceeded to sit in an armchair, taking a swig every few minutes and staring into nothingness as her mind tried to process everything.

Andrew eventually more-or-less composed himself and knew he needed to hear back from his mom, creeping downstairs and peeking at the near-catatonic Charlene.

‘Oh shit, this is totally not good’, Andrea thought.

Andrew had only ever seen her mother like this once before, when her parents had died in a car accident many years ago.

They were a huge part of her life, and as John was overseas and out of contact, she was left to take care of a young Andrew by herself.

It all came to a head when she left Andrew in the car outside a tall building.

Andrew got bored and decided to go look for her, finding her on the roof.

Andrew’s cries brought her out of her stupor, and with time and lots of therapy and the love of her family, she got back to the Charlene she used to be.

It explained in part of why she was so doting on Andrew generally and harsh on him when he misbehaved, always wanting what she considered to be the best for him.

Andrew was in dire straits.

The situation with Charlene was similar to that with Brian, but with much higher stakes.

Andrew could pretend he just had a panic attack due to feeling scared or something and was in denial about ‘her’ womanly status.

If he could hold out with the charade a little longer, he could get into a college through clearing, have an epiphany and declare it all a phase or something, and de-transgender himself (or whatever the terminology was).

It would mean having to put up with whatever girly shit his mother would **** him into, and having to spend more time as Brian’s girlfriend, and probably provide him with more sexual favours to satiate his boundless libido, but if it meant nipping his mother’s descent into despair in the bud, then it could be worth it in the end.

But could Andrew go through with it?