About as honest as Obi-Wan telling Luke about his dad.

Well, you can’t be honest. “I’m unemployed and I **** people,” would probably be too much of a shock to the system. Even if you add “but just people who I’m positive suck.” Especially if then you have to answer how you get groceries …

You: Don’t laugh.

You: I’m a bounty hunter.

Alex: That’s gonna’ be a hard promise to keep.

You: I know, the field is … bad. A lot of weekend warrior survivalist nutjobs.

You: But I’m good at finding stuff.

You: And I’m pretty sure the cops won’t hire me.

Alex: Eh, fuck the police.

You: Truer words.

You: I’m not in it to look macho and pretend I’m a rebel, it’s just where my skills are.

Alex: Then I’m laughing a little less.

Alex: Still laughing, though!

Alex: So, did you?

You: Did I what?

You’re ninety-nine percent sure she’s asking if you masturbated to her pictures last night. Which, you know, you DID … but if it’s that one percent, boy, is that going to be awkward to just say. Or ask the question in your mind, namely if she masturbated thinking about you.

Alex: Jack off.

Alex: To me, specifically.

You: I feel like no answer here is a win …

Alex: Try me!

You: Yes, obviously.

You: You’re incredibly sexy, and it’s been … ugh, five years? At least five years.

You: Since my last date. Longer for actual company.

Alex: I thought MY dry spell was bad!

Alex: Sorry, I’m being a perv again.

Alex: It’s been a while. For me, also. Was my point.

You: Would you want to go out some time?

Immediate regret. And do what, walk around with a blindfold on her?

You: Not a booty call.

You: Actual date, no assumptions for post-date.

Alex: Hm.

Alex: I WANT to.

Alex: But I feel weird after this business with Jameson.

You wonder for a moment, as frustration joins the relief of not having to come up with a way to stay hidden in public besides your usual method, if you can kill Jameson twice.

Alex: Not a no!

Alex: And not a “not a no that’s a no,” no.

Alex: I’m actually super-interested, I just wanted to talk to you some more so I can feel like I’m not walking into another disaster.

Alex: A guy literally leaving town to get away from you is up there on things that shake your self-esteem.

You: Totally get it. The only things you know about me are that I know the town better than you and buy cell phones off shady drifters.

You: I could come more highly recommended right now.

Alex: I DO like you asking, though.

Alex: And I like that you think I’m sexy.

Alex: Not that I don’t get that a lot? But most guys I get it from are VERY in my space about it.

Alex: I don’t mind that if I invite them there, though.

Alex: And I’m pretty sure the video I sent you counted as a pretty hard invite.

You can tell she’s dancing on the edge of making bad decisions with you here. On the one hand, you’d absolutely like to talk dirty (maybe even with actual voices?) with Alex, as your dick is extremely intent on reminding you. On the other … ever meeting her is a long shot, but you feel that pushing her right now MIGHT lead to fun short-term results, but kill that possibility by characterizing you a certain way.