A pocket magazine with dirty 'choose-your-own-adventures' stories

You see a glossed thick pocket magazine lying in the bottom of the box. contained in a plastic book wrapping. It has a fake 'magical spellbook' style visual design on the front with the title 'Contained Encounters with Malus Mylfrot, volume 1" written in gothic font.

The rear cover had a pure text look, with a basic blurb.

"These are some of Malus Mylfrot encounters with various local characters of myth and legend,
written in the multiple choice pattern that most easily represent his mastery of warping time, space and reality.

Warning, thaumatic virality level 4! Wear gloves, discharge safely and keep cleaning tools nearby before activating!

Malus Mylfrot may be neutralized, but his dreams and powers echo through time.
- Marius Septimus, Archivist of Pandora's Containment Bureau, [c] 143BC & 2012CE".

You sigh and look at the clock on the wall, wondering if you got the time for this. You catch yourself in the hallway mirror while pondering.

Welp, you're not going out looking like that any time soon anyway.