"it wasn't me"-defense

"What? That's absurd!" You deny.

{if wife_activepast==true}"Is it, honey? You were alone and we haven't been intimate in a long time. I suspected you had been masturbating whenever I wasn't around."
You are not sure what to answer.
"Most people do it", Lisa says, "it feels good."
You are a bit taken aback, but you have to ask, "Do you masturbate?"

Your wife looks at you puzzled, "of course, John, you don't think I go to bed early just to binge tv-shows?"

"I... I... never knew," you stammer "I thought you ..."

"You're just so silly sometimes," Lisa says, "I am tired and I am going to sleep now".

Your cock is getting a little erect by this sudden epiphany. You honestly didn't know this. You are picturing your wife masturbating. Your mind was racing with questions "What porn does she watch? Why did we stop having sex. Was it my fault?"

{else}"Is it?" Lisa raises her voice, "I can show you the porn you have been watching: {if black==1}A gigantic big dick was fucking this blonde secretary!{elseif lesbian==1}two girls with dildo's, really!{else}a girl half your age sucking a cock!{endif}" You stick to your plan, the Shaggy defense, "I haven't got a clue what you're on about." Lisa throws her hands in the air and yells "you know what John, I actually am tired and I am going to bed. I don't want to have this conversation now." She goes to bed.

You wait here for a while, hoping she will fall asleep soon and when you think she is asleep, you go to the bedroom.{endif}