Alice in Nastyland

Alice awakes to the sound of chirping birds. This is a special day. It's her eighteenth birthday. She jumps out of bed in her white nightgown and walks over to her mirror. She smiles at the pretty woman she's grown up to be. She grabs her brush and begins to brush her long blonde hair.

There is a rustle over from the side of the room. She turns to see if something is there. Nothing. As she continues combing her hair there is another noise. Again she looks. Again nothing. "Hmph," she thinks to herself, "how strange."

Suddenly from in her mirror she sees something appear behind her. It's a disembodied smile. "I know that smile!" she shouts as she flips around to see the rest of the Cheshire Cat materialize. "Oh Cheshire Cat, where have you been all this time?" she asks.

"I little bit here, a little bit there, to places far, to places near." He is sinister as ever.

"Have you come to take me back to Wonderland?" Alice asks eagerly, curious as to what strange marvelous wonders await her this time.

"Not quite, my dear Alice," says the Cheshire Cat. "I come to take you a place quite different."

"Different than Wonderland?" Alice is shocked that other such magical places even exist. "How is it different? Is it better? Is it even better than Wonderland?"

The Cheshire Cat smiles with his big ivory grin. "It may be worser, it may be better, but rest assured it shall make you wetter." And with that, he begins to fade, piece by piece until only the smile is left. "Don't worry Alice it will be fun, you shall do things no other girl has ever done."

And then he's gone. "What a queer thing to say," Alice thinks. Oh well, if something is to happen, just like last time, it will be out of her hands. She slips into her blue day dress and walks out into the living room. The house is empty. "Mother? Father?" she calls but there's no answer. As she walks up to the dining room table she sees a small cake. There is a note written on it. She's seen this before.

"Eat Me." it says.