Adventure in kohnana

Axel was on a mission provided to him by his mum Jill to go and pic up his uncle at the airport.

Now having just got his license axel is more then happy to have a excuse to go out in his brand new junker(it being a pice of crap 5 hands removed box) blasting out his burnt cds,

Placing mix dics 3 in once he got to the red light about a 3rd the way to the airport (it being a other 48mile drive) and pressing play he's happy to find one of his favourite songs kick in and starts singing along as he speeds off "Carrrrrry on myyyy wayward soooon, For there'll be peace when you are donnneee, Lay your wearrry head to reeeessst, Don't you cry no more"

BAAANNGGG!! SMASH BUMP BUMP BOOM!

just as axel was pulling out a car came flying past him from the right knocking the front of his car now being pointed to the left the cars behind came plowing into the left of the car... And wouldn't you know it the car behind was a FUCKING SNOW PLOW topeling his car over thanks to the drivers stupidity of wanting to get to where he was going pulling off the moment he saw the red light turn green meant the fucktard dint have enough time to break properly.

Needless to say axel was prity fucking fucked, his car totaled and upside-down speekers blazing kansas way to high now his ears ringing and his vision fading, just when he figured he'd pass out a icey pain shot up his back originated in his stomach his eyes shooting open and looking up(as he's upside down) he could see a lump of jagged metal digging in to what should be his stomach and liver, blood poring out over dramatically to the point he couldn't help but hope he's dreaming as he thought that blood shouldn't spill THAT quickly... Alas it was to late though with that last of the energy in him he coffed out his last word (wanting to be cool like in the movies and TV)

"YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! AH, DAMN YOU! GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!"

...

"shit... Wrong film"

.

.

.

Opening his eyes axel couldn't help but feal like he was in a intro of doctors who as light passed him in various shapes sizes pigments all with what looked like photos of his life in the background though all he could hear was the distorted kansas carry on my son song as his life played out before him.

As the song finished and the light and images of his life finished playing, everything faded to black and then Boom a blinding white light so bright axel covered his eyes with his arms

Adjusting to the light and opening his eyes again to a white room with a black floor... Exept the walls seem to go on forever up and up and up, spinning around a few times to take in the room on the 3rd spin he couldn't help but stop as now a chair appeared by the wall black leather triple recliner movie seats...

"OK... What the fuck is going on HELLO... ANYONE?"

Suddenly two doors opened on ether side of the room on the left a creacher 6ft in hight blooby mass of skin and bone covered in black ooz,

It looks at axle then past him to the other door axle looks at the other door following it's gaze but can see nothing as the doors shut, panicked axel looks back to the... Thing?...

And it was wasn't there, looking around then noticeing it was sat in one of the chairs

"if you'd take a seat axel please" a voice out of nowhere seemed to ask

"W.. What who um... Hello?"

"figured it be like this... Haaaaa... OK take a seat axel and give me a moment and all will be explained OK don't worry about our friend there she won't bite... Well now anyway"

AHH fuck my life... Judging by this some one must hate me axel thought to himself, doing as aske he took the last seat to the right and let out a sigh "ahhh so... Who or what may you be?" axel asked as he tund to the thing,

It tund looked at axel nodded and sat back in the chair

Looking back the door had gone"well this was weird befor but let's just add one more to the growing list shall we"

Tuning back axel jumped now there was a woman sat in between him and the thing she looked at axel and then looked at it (unknown) "OK axel meet... U'llamin a thraajin'urrd"

(axel) "who a what???"

(unknown) "OK so ulla call her ulla easyer for a human to process and she's a well think something akin to a outer god or and ancient one like in the story's you like by H. P. L"

(axel) "OK I think I get you so ulla... Um... Nice to meet you?"

(unknown) "you can't understand her at the moment axel so ill be your interpreter I'm kila by the way"

(kila) "and befor you ask, this isn't a dream you died I'm not God... She's a lazy bitch and doesn't do anything... Hasn't in nearly 2000 years actually calls it a holiday... Fucking arse holes holiday piled up MY WORK... Sorry I know she's omnipresent even if she pretends not to be... I'm also your reaper today as well as hers the problem being you are not ment to die for anther 20 years and her 20000 years so as of now I'll get down to buissnes"

(axel) "umm OK then... Can I prepare my self a second"

(kila) "go ahead"

Getting up and moving so his back is to the both of them and thinking to himself; WTFWTFWTFWTFWTFHOWWHYIMEANSHESHOTANDNOWIMDEADWHATABOUTMOMANDUNCLEISTJEREAAFTERLIFEISTJISITAMIGOIMGTOBELEFTTOTJISMADNESSFOREVER.

(kila) ". . . relax Mr axel well get everything sorted now please com sit and listen for now OK"

Relaxing a bit and slapping himself for freaking out axel sits back down

(kila) "right so... Our head of department has worked out 2 solutions for what's happened 1 is we can send you both to be cleansed another words random blank reincarnation you cold end up as anything... Like ANYTHING or the second option both be reincarnated to the same family in another dimension with about 50% of your memorys obviously you wouldn't be able to keep memorys of how to do anything that would alter or warp the reality you'd be sent to but it be a new life for you both and you'd get a perk aswell so what you say? "

Mulling it over for a bit axel rearly didn't want a blank slate or to end up as a rat or some tiny space critter that be munched like nothing but he new nothing of this ulla or her... Race?...

Ahh fuck it why not

(axel)" ahh hell why not if this ulla is up for it I am, got to be better then ending up as a shrimp or rat or earwig or something"

Kila tund to ulla for about 2 minutes then terns back to axel

"OK I'll just send the paper work and then you'll both be on your way, but 1st is there anything you'd like for your perk when your reborn "

(axel) "something like a allseing eye hub ability... Like say I consentrate on something it tell me about it and what or abot them?"

(kila)"we got something like that and you'll get a hub any ways"

Kila tund back to ulla for another minute or two got up and walked to the door (which had returned with out me noticing) "right just sit and relax for a min and then you'll be off"

Like that she was gone leaving us... Axel and ulla together... Even though we couldn't talk... Because we couldn't understand eachother...

... OK well THIS IS AWKWARD...

Buzz boom zzzz zzzz zzapp

Once again out of nowhere a blinding white lite that axle had to sheld his eyes from... Opening them not long after noticed he was back to the weird doctor who shit again, though now ullu was next to him as the doc who lights began to fade he couldn't help but notice that ulla looked more and more human as the light faded Exept covered in black with nothing noticeable in appearance because of ... Well... Black... Exept for and amazing chest, if axel had to guess it was along the lings of a large furm c or small cc size bust,

But that didn't matter now as all the light hade gone now and he was on his own ulla had disappeared with the darkness