About me
- Gender
- Male
- Birthday
- November 12
- Location
- WHAT'S THAT COMING OVER THE HILL
- Homepage
- -
Get to know me better
- When I'm not writing erotica I like to
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code, fuck around on YouTube, read, watch movies, and come up with my next piece of indefensible, illiterate, inartistic filth.
- When I'm not reading erotica I like to read
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crime, sci-fi, fantasy, programming manuals; mystery, comics, comedy and anything else I can get my hands on. Then I rip out all my favorite bits, get out my potato masher and MASH THAT SHIT UP into a hideous mixture of wet pulp and smeared ink… until eventually I get something that feels original, but secretly isn’t.
- My favorite word for "penis" is
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cock. Oh, how prettily it trips off the tongue.
- My favorite word for "vagina" is
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cunt. (Usually. Depends on the character.)
- I write erotica because
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fiction turns the author into God, and if I was God, I would fuck many gorgeous celebrities. But I’m not, so I hallucinate onto paper instead and you’re all invited. I dunno. Maybe I just like carving impossible worlds out of my brain tissue and opening them up for people to visit, like a sexy John Hammond.
- In conclusion, I am
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a disappointment to my father.
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Introduction
Chapter 1 in Ultimate Fantasies: Fuck Your Favorite Celebrity!
> DISCLAIMER: As always, this story is entirely fictitious, it’s strictly unsuitable for anyone under 18 and exactly none of the people, events or anything else described are intended to bear even the faintest resemblance to real life. > ...Which would be difficult in any case...
6 years ago 374 Words 43 Likes 28,092 Views -
[SPECIAL:] Fuck Your Favorite Celebrity!
Chapter 2 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Hello again, my faithful fapping friends! First, an announcement – I’M NOT DEAD! I’ve just been on a bit of a break, that’s all. And I’m back bearing gifts… namely, a brand-new story, which uses CHYOA’s customization options to do something fairly fucking rad. [CLICK HERE](...
6 years ago 439 Words 25 Likes 19,459 Views -
Introduction
Chapter 1 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
 > DISCLAIMER: Yeah, so obviously, this story is entirely fictitious, it’s strictly not suitable for anyone under 18 and absolutely none of the people, events or anything else describ...
6 years ago 216 Words 147 Likes 189,729 Viewsemma watson emma stone celebrity sex story erotica sex sexy british topless nude cock pussy cunt boobs tits cumshot girlfriend photoshoot taxi famous dirty posh brunette sweet smart funny emma watson stone celeb cute cum on clothes cum in hair slow burn ultimate fantasies fantasy ultimate fantasies english star movie star hollywood party cosplay -
Emma chooses three girls for you!
Chapter 230 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
>  > >  > >  Emma take...
6 years ago 346 Words 20 Likes 6,159 Views -
Fuck Bonnie, marry Evanna, kill Katie!
Chapter 227 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘Fuck Bonnie?’ Emma, her face twisted with embarrassment, nods. ‘Understandable. First tits you ever saw and everything. D’you think she shaves?’ ‘I – I really have no idea,’ Emma begins hotly. Then she pauses, and you can almost see the curiosity forming. ‘What does...
6 years ago 749 Words 24 Likes 6,271 Views -
Her Harry Potter castmates – Bonnie Wright, Evanna Lynch, and Katie Leung!
Chapter 226 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
>  ‘Oh, Christ,’ Emma moans, as you scroll carefully through pictures of the pretty, elfin Evann Lynch. ‘Oh, God. How am I ever going to look my friends in the eye after this?’ You snicker quie...
6 years ago 448 Words 23 Likes 6,401 Views -
Emma pulls up the lyrics…
Chapter 237 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
It takes a moment, but finally you’re lying on your back, cock deep inside Emma’s tight, velvety vagina, while she holds her phone in one hand and rocks her hips experimentally. ‘Jesus, this is ridiculous,’ she mumbles. Then, before you can say anything – ‘I know, I know, no j...
6 years ago 1,100 Words 26 Likes 5,679 Views -
Not what you expect!
Chapter 229 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Emma gives you a cheeky wink, withdrawing her fingers from her panties and sucking them daintily. ‘And then, Katie and Evanna come back outside, and we scramble to put our tops back on, and never speak of this again. The end.’ You exhale in a loud whoosh, as Emma giggles and s...
6 years ago 129 Words 25 Likes 5,745 Views -
She does!
Chapter 228 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Emma studies you for a moment, clearly undecided. Which makes sense – you’re not bisexual yourself, but it must be a little weird perving on people of your own gender, right next to your straight partner. You’re about to tell her to forget it when Emma nods suddenly. ‘Okay. Fi...
6 years ago 1,005 Words 21 Likes 6,070 Views -
Play Fuck, Marry, Kill with Emma!
Chapter 225 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘You know the rules, I assume?’ you ask politely. Emma rolls her eyes to the ceiling. ‘What, to Fuck, Marry, Kill? No, do enlighten me, won’t you?’ She shakes her head, looking apprehensive. ‘I can’t believe we’re actually doing this. I’m so going to feminist hell.’ You ele...
6 years ago 421 Words 27 Likes 6,222 Views -
Show her something a little more female-friendly…
Chapter 222 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
>  > [gfycat link in HD](https://gfycat.com/SoupyCautiousAcornbarnacle) ‘She’s pretty,’ Emma says breathlessly, eyes hooked on the screen. Beside you, her fingers are now determined...
6 years ago 817 Words 34 Likes 7,070 Views -
‘Are you kidding?’
Chapter 219 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Emma looks up at the amusement evident in your voice. ‘Jerking off to hot girls is one of life’s greatest pleasures, Em! And trust me, I should know.’ ‘Oh, I know you used to do it to me,’ Emma says, a glimmer of pride evident in her voice. ‘And, I suppose, I always knew… that...
6 years ago 416 Words 29 Likes 7,407 Views -
You do!
Chapter 218 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
You get your fingers underneath it just in time, loving this. ‘And what’s this? Something I shouldn’t be looking at?’ ‘It’s – nothing –’ Emma stammers, blushing even harder. ‘Oh, God – please, just shut the lid, okay?’ You relent, still smirking. ‘Hey, I’m only playing, swe...
6 years ago 462 Words 31 Likes 7,930 Views -
Knock on Emma’s door…
Chapter 217 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
You step out of the elevator, gifts in hand. They’re a bit rough-and-ready – you caught a glimpse of the presents Sarah had wrapped downstairs, and yours are nowhere near as neat or shiny or expensive-looking. You’ve never been all that great with ribbons and tags, either. But...
6 years ago 408 Words 24 Likes 8,627 Views -
[BONUS SCENE:] Happy Birthday, Emma!
Chapter 216 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
You’re bouncing on the balls of your feet slightly, watching the numbers on the elevator panel click upwards. _3._ _4._ _5._ Emma’s in the penthouse, naturally, so there’s a few more floors to go. About twenty seconds, maybe. You can already feel the excitement rising in yo...
6 years ago 176 Words 30 Likes 11,016 Views -
Speaking of which…
Chapter 214 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘Speaking of things I’ve been asking for…’ Emma rolls her eyes, but can’t help blushing slightly. ‘Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Has it come yet?’ ‘I don’t _know,’_ Emma says primly, although her eyes are sparkling. ‘But I did pay for next-day delivery, so, probably,...
6 years ago 505 Words 40 Likes 6,957 Views -
She wouldn’t, would she?
Chapter 208 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘He always did sabotage himself,’ Emma mutters, almost to herself. ‘Everything good in his life, he tried his hardest to fuck it up. His family, his inheritance. You. Me.’ ‘Yeah,’ you say quietly, because there’s not much else to say. ‘At least now he can’t hurt anyone any mor...
6 years ago 694 Words 33 Likes 5,514 Views -
A few minutes later…
Chapter 197 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
A little while later, you slip out of the shadows to confront Justin. ‘James!’ Justin doesn’t look surprised – in fact, he almost looks pleased. ‘What an unexpected pleasure. I was just wondering when or if I’d ever see you again.’ You stalk towards him. ‘Wish granted.’...
6 years ago 403 Words 23 Likes 4,780 Views -
You try to rest… but you’ve still got unfinished business.
Chapter 194 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
You doze through most of the day, with the result that by the time night falls, you’re wide awake. Emma stayed with you all day, but on the insistence of a large, matronly nurse, she’s sleeping in the room next door. There are two armed guards outside, and Alan’s still roaming...
6 years ago 320 Words 25 Likes 4,993 Views -
Alan confesses…
Chapter 192 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘Ah… that’s, well…’ He clears his throat. ‘I suppose I might as well tell you – sorry, ma’am. I’d – well, I got a text from a friend who owns a market stall. That magazine you posed in… it finally got delivered to the island, and I was just heading down to the town to pick up a c...
6 years ago 209 Words 27 Likes 5,202 Views
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