TheOptimisticDuck
Senior Author
- TheOptimisticDuck was last seen:
- In another dimension
- Gender:
- Male
- Birthday:
- November 12
- Location:
- WHAT'S THAT COMING OVER THE HILL
- Homepage:
- -
- When I'm not writing erotica I like to
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code, fuck around on YouTube, read, watch movies, and come up with my next piece of indefensible, illiterate, inartistic filth.
- When I'm not reading erotica I like to read
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crime, sci-fi, fantasy, programming manuals; mystery, comics, comedy and anything else I can get my hands on. Then I rip out all my favorite bits, get out my potato masher and MASH THAT SHIT UP into a hideous mixture of wet pulp and smeared ink… until eventually I get something that feels original, but secretly isn’t.
- My favorite word for "penis" is
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cock. Oh, how prettily it trips off the tongue.
- My favorite word for "vagina" is
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cunt. (Usually. Depends on the character.)
- I write erotica because
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fiction turns the author into God, and if I was God, I would fuck many gorgeous celebrities. But I’m not, so I hallucinate onto paper instead and you’re all invited. I dunno. Maybe I just like carving impossible worlds out of my brain tissue and opening them up for people to visit, like a sexy John Hammond.
- In conclusion, I am
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a disappointment to my father.
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TheOptimisticDuck has not contributed chapters to other stories.
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Introduction by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 1 in Ultimate Fantasies: Fuck Your Favorite Celebrity!
> DISCLAIMER: As always, this story is entirely fictitious, it’s strictly unsuitable for anyone under 18 and exactly none of the people, events or anything else described are intended to bear even the faintest resemblance to real life. > ...Which would be difficult in any case...
- 43 Likes
- 28,046 Views
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[SPECIAL:] Fuck Your Favorite Celebrity! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 2 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Hello again, my faithful fapping friends! First, an announcement – I’M NOT DEAD! I’ve just been on a bit of a break, that’s all. And I’m back bearing gifts… namely, a brand-new story, which uses CHYOA’s customization options to do something fairly fucking rad. [CLICK HERE](...
- 25 Likes
- 19,426 Views
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Introduction by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 1 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
 > DISCLAIMER: Yeah, so obviously, this story is entirely fictitious, it’s strictly not suitable for anyone under 18 and absolutely none of the people, events or anything else describ...
- 147 Likes
- 189,433 Views
More emma watson, emma stone, celebrity, sex story, erotica, sex, sexy, british, topless, nude, cock, pussy, cunt, boobs, tits, cumshot, girlfriend, photoshoot, taxi, famous, dirty, posh, brunette, sweet, smart, funny, emma, watson, stone, celeb, cute, cum on clothes, cum in hair, slow burn, ultimate, fantasies, fantasy, ultimate fantasies, english, star, movie star, hollywood, party, cosplay -
Emma chooses three girls for you! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 230 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
>  > >  > >  Emma take...
- 20 Likes
- 6,142 Views
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Fuck Bonnie, marry Evanna, kill Katie! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 227 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘Fuck Bonnie?’ Emma, her face twisted with embarrassment, nods. ‘Understandable. First tits you ever saw and everything. D’you think she shaves?’ ‘I – I really have no idea,’ Emma begins hotly. Then she pauses, and you can almost see the curiosity forming. ‘What does...
- 24 Likes
- 6,251 Views
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Her Harry Potter castmates – Bonnie Wright, Evanna Lynch, and Katie Leung! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 226 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
>  ‘Oh, Christ,’ Emma moans, as you scroll carefully through pictures of the pretty, elfin Evann Lynch. ‘Oh, God. How am I ever going to look my friends in the eye after this?’ You snicker quie...
- 23 Likes
- 6,371 Views
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Emma pulls up the lyrics… by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 237 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
It takes a moment, but finally you’re lying on your back, cock deep inside Emma’s tight, velvety vagina, while she holds her phone in one hand and rocks her hips experimentally. ‘Jesus, this is ridiculous,’ she mumbles. Then, before you can say anything – ‘I know, I know, no j...
- 26 Likes
- 5,666 Views
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Not what you expect! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 229 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Emma gives you a cheeky wink, withdrawing her fingers from her panties and sucking them daintily. ‘And then, Katie and Evanna come back outside, and we scramble to put our tops back on, and never speak of this again. The end.’ You exhale in a loud whoosh, as Emma giggles and s...
- 25 Likes
- 5,729 Views
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She does! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 228 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
Emma studies you for a moment, clearly undecided. Which makes sense – you’re not bisexual yourself, but it must be a little weird perving on people of your own gender, right next to your straight partner. You’re about to tell her to forget it when Emma nods suddenly. ‘Okay. Fi...
- 21 Likes
- 6,054 Views
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Play Fuck, Marry, Kill with Emma! by TheOptimisticDuck
Chapter 225 in Ultimate Fantasies: Emma Watson
‘You know the rules, I assume?’ you ask politely. Emma rolls her eyes to the ceiling. ‘What, to Fuck, Marry, Kill? No, do enlighten me, won’t you?’ She shakes her head, looking apprehensive. ‘I can’t believe we’re actually doing this. I’m so going to feminist hell.’ You ele...
- 27 Likes
- 6,204 Views
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