About me
Get to know me better
- When I'm not writing erotica I like to
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Play Videogames, Watch Anime, Drown my sorrows in Porter. Although i have no sorrows. i still drown them though.
- When I'm not reading erotica I like to read
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Everything. Except Sci-Fi. Fuck that shit, i want dragons, demons, damsels in distress, dudes in discord, drowning debaters and daring dealers. Alliterations are the greatest thing known to humans, closely followed by great arses.
- My favorite word for "penis" is
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- My favorite word for "vagina" is
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- I write erotica because
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I am fucking bored. Do you see this extensive profile description? I have literally nothing better to do in my free time. Now go read my stories, they are mediocre!
- In conclusion, I am
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MEDIOCRE I TELL YOU! The english language is a bit stiff to me. Als Deutscher kann ich die Satzstrukturen dieser Sprache nicht völlig absorbieren. That's partly why i do this shit, to comprehend the english language. Mostly i do it to make attractive characters bang though.
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Dissonance 16 – Living beneath the Manhole [Otto POV]
by Funatic
Chapter 28 in Corporate Dominion
Otto bounced his foot, the pounding of his heel on the floor mismatching the electric jazz beat of the video playing on the large screen usually reserved for replays of sports events. “Look at that half-ogre Otto With the strength of ten bulls Squeezin' heads into meatballs L...
1 week ago 2,523 Words 13 Likes 106 Views -
Full Words, Empty Kisses
by Funatic
Chapter 2147 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
John was experiencing a drawback of his new status, which made him quite happy. Whenever the world presented him with a strict upgrade in his circumstances, he regarded it with great suspicion. His reduced workload had come with a variety of invisible costs. Now, he was also expe...
1 week ago 2,409 Words 48 Likes 2,155 Views -
Perks, Plans and Progeny
by Funatic
Chapter 2146 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
John woke up under the open sky. The rays of the sun kissed his face. When he blinked himself awake, he could immediately see. ‘Aclysia is not going to like that,’ he thought. His maid was always concerned that sleeping with contacts in would lead to bacterial growth. He both do...
1 week ago 2,410 Words 53 Likes 804 Views -
Breedolotl [Erotic Content]
by Funatic
Chapter 2145 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
The crowd quietly stared at the horizon. Those on the ground saw little, the two and three story buildings all around obscuring their vision. Others had climbed to the rooftops, to get a better view of the fading light of the set sun. Enchantments on the braziers activated just...
1 week ago 3,083 Words 50 Likes 837 Views -
Dissonance 15 – Work Continues
by Funatic
Chapter 27 in Corporate Dominion
“So, you just nutted inside her without a second thought?” Avari asked. “You know how fertile goblins are, right?” “Fecund,” Nyx offered a more artistic word. “No, I did have a second thought, it just came out the same as the first.” Eldred’s fingers combed through Ellie’s hair...
1 week ago 2,082 Words 13 Likes 105 Views -
Carnal Exultation [Erotic Content]
by Funatic
Chapter 2144 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
The main street was rapidly transformed. Constructs of wood and steel were assembled. Stalls for the merchants, stages for the artists, circles for the warriors, and, at the foot of the pyramid, a small copy of it was erected by stone mages to oversee it all. Even after the cerem...
1 week ago 3,702 Words 48 Likes 736 Views -
Dissonance 14 – Emptying Deez Nutz [Erotic Content]
by Funatic
Chapter 26 in Corporate Dominion
The girlfailure goblin fumbled around, trying to open the front of his pants. Jittery hands failed to unhook the little metal clasp. “No need to hurry,” Eldred assured the adorable, small woman. His hand once more stroked her silky hair. Looking past her shoulders gave him a nice...
1 week ago 3,672 Words 13 Likes 144 Views -
Wifealotl
by Funatic
Chapter 2143 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
There was no journey to reach New Tenochtitlan. A simple and short walk had seen them move from the Guild Hall to a Protected Space Lee had put up on Liberty Island. Large black robes covered their modesty during the very short walks, remaining on them as they stepped through th...
2 weeks ago 2,957 Words 55 Likes 1,129 Views -
On the Morning of a Tribal Marriage
by Funatic
Chapter 2142 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
The Moira bullying continued the next morning. “That’s right, that’s how a girl with such a naughty ‘armour’ should start her day.” The first empress of Fusion had truly mastered the art of mixing mockery and seductive awe. “You were the one… that insisted… I should get… a body...
2 weeks ago 2,630 Words 53 Likes 807 Views -
Tree of
by Funatic
Chapter 2141 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
John had studied enough patterns in his time to recognize the way the hollowed-out roots had ‘grown’. Of course, they hadn’t actually grown, being as much a spawn of Gaia’s design as everything else inside the Instant Dungeon… well, that was arguably true beyond the Instant Dunge...
2 weeks ago 2,456 Words 59 Likes 965 Views -
Dissonance 13 – Mind Goblin
by Funatic
Chapter 25 in Corporate Dominion
“Com-pu-ter…” Ellie mouthed the word. The group was in an electronics shop. They had spotted it on the way back and with there being actual funds in their corporate account, Avari had decided that it was time to upgrade from the ancient laptop. It worked, yes, but the age had ta...
2 weeks ago 2,280 Words 12 Likes 130 Views -
Forbidden Fluid
by Funatic
Chapter 2140 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
Moira’s hammer crashed into the spine of another Overseer. The system registered the blow as fatal, sparing them the effort needed to kill a paralyzed enemy. “Another demon slain,” Moira remarked proudly. “Another bit of proof ya need better armour.” Jane put a finger on one of...
2 weeks ago 2,357 Words 60 Likes 794 Views -
Dissonance 12 – Goblin Cleaning and History Lessons
by Funatic
Chapter 24 in Corporate Dominion
The less said about the hospital visit, the better. When Eldred heard the words ‘deworming procedure’, he had decided that there were things that he did not need to harden himself against. Alas, Avari and Nyx had made that same decision and leaving Ellie in the hospital alone wo...
2 weeks ago 4,169 Words 12 Likes 124 Views -
Dissonance 11 – What is a King to a Cultivator?
by Funatic
Chapter 23 in Corporate Dominion
What is a king to a Cultivator? Eldred was not the philosophical type, but even he found himself contemplating that question. He had enough time on his hands, to trot at a reduced speed courtesy of his decisions. The crate of alchemical supplies would have slowed him to a...
2 weeks ago 2,346 Words 11 Likes 100 Views -
Dissonance 10 – Ugo
by Funatic
Chapter 22 in Corporate Dominion
The goblin female looked at his hand for several seconds. Her eyes then roamed towards the rest of him, taking in who, or rather what, he actually was. There was a clear intelligence in those yellow eyes, a spark that made her a person where her kin had been beasts. “Can you not...
3 weeks ago 1,987 Words 12 Likes 111 Views -
Dissonance 9 – Creatures
by Funatic
Chapter 21 in Corporate Dominion
The savage goblin was a hideous thing. His head was large, almost bulbous, and covered in various warts that gave him a sickly look. The yellow colour of his slit-pupiled eyes only added to that impression. Those eyes went wide as Eldred charged out of the woods. Closing the dis...
3 weeks ago 2,841 Words 12 Likes 137 Views -
Smiting and Kissing
by Funatic
Chapter 2139 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
Jane, Hailey, Moira and Ehtra – one light mage, two faithful and an angel of vengeance. It was a rather holy-themed party. Leaning into that, John elected that they would do a clear of a good old Demon Dungeon. The blackness beyond the I.D. Gate changed in accordance with the ac...
3 weeks ago 2,746 Words 56 Likes 1,226 Views -
Dissonance 8 – Start to a Small Adventure
by Funatic
Chapter 20 in Corporate Dominion
The portal was tiny, barely large enough for one person to walk through at a time. It was no wonder, then, that it was located in the middle of a factory hall, its surroundings poorly defended. Since a war over the Echo yield of such a small rift would hardly be worth it, the foc...
3 weeks ago 2,167 Words 12 Likes 142 Views -
Dissonance 7 – Weapons and Wiles
by Funatic
Chapter 19 in Corporate Dominion
The weapons in the sparring room came in wood, steel and blunted steel varieties. Practicing with sharp weapons may not have been the most advisable, but if someone died playing with knives, that wasn’t the company’s problem. Well, except for the part where they had to potentiall...
3 weeks ago 2,609 Words 12 Likes 118 Views -
Leisurely Grinding
by Funatic
Chapter 2138 in The Gamer, Chyoa edition.
“And with that, you are done for the day,” Ehtra stated. John laughed loudly. It wasn’t like the First of Hatred to deliver a joke of this variety, which made it even funnier. One of her finely swung eyebrows rose contemptuously at his outburst. That made him giggle more. Then,...
3 weeks ago 2,357 Words 52 Likes 736 Views
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