You really don't know

You are sitting on a bench at the Royal Academy the place you've wanted to go to since you learned of it's existence. To get here you sacrificed your autonomy, you decided to let Anastasia believe she had authority over you and believed you could never let know that authority wasn't real, but that did make it real. The threat she could bring to bare against you was that she would remove you from the academy but you have been removed and now all you could think about was how meaningless that threat had become the moment you realise you had power. Your goal to come to the academy wasn't real anymore, you weren't below average you were exceptional literal Goddess chosen, so did you even care about attending academy?

Maybe.

It was the only answer you had, this was the first year so maybe in the future you would get to more advanced classes, but that wasn't the case now and waiting a year doing things you already knew seemed a waste of your time.

If you didn't attend the academy you'd damaged Anastasia plan to become Queen but not really. With how powerful you are academy or no you'd still be invaluable. You wouldn't see Edin or Vatarie or Lucia or any of the others as much but you would still see them. Vatarie and Asune might have to stop courting you but you doubt it, if not for personal reason the same reason as Anastasia, your power makes you too important to just ignore.

You wouldn't have a room but Anastasia, Vatarie or Asune would undoubtedly offer you one, same goes for food and probably anything else you'd want so you wouldn't need a job. If you did need a job, well you doubt you would find much difficultly in getting one. Hell you could just go to the Queen and offer your services. You seriously doubt she would refuse.

So what do you want?

WHAT do you want?

What do YOU want?

Is there a personal goal buried somewhere inside you, beneath the noise of everyone else's goals?

You close your eyes and think about what you want. The first thing that comes to mind is everyone. The people you'd become friends with, you want to spend more time with them you want to be with them. But isn't that just a consequence of you being isolated for so long? Do you even care?

No so what if you only want to be with your friend and lovers because you had been alone, you want to be with them. You don't care if you don't have a grand personal goal. You always had small one, improving your knowledge building your magic becoming more than are right now and that means staying at the academy, at least for now.

You open your eyes and look at Stephanie she is standing in the same spot, hands at the ready is you lose control again. "I want to be with the people I care about and be more than I am now."

Stephanie chews over your response for almost a minute before she says, "Not good enough."

"What?" You asked standing up both in surprise and annoyance at being denied so bluntly. Stephanie draws her sword and dagger ready for a fight. You hold a hand a sit back down as you feel your magic rising in excitement to respond. "Sorry, sorry." A few deep breaths and you feel your magic recede. "Why isn't it good enough?"

"Because it is about other people. You can become more than you are now in countless way, go to the Royal Library to learn, start some fights to get stronger, explore the world, you don't need to be here to do that. If you want to stay you must prove you want to remain here, at the academy, you want to put up with classes that are beneath you."

You furrow your brow and go back to thinking.

You aren't sure how long you spend thinking, you feel the sun rising and the warmth on your back as crests the stand. And still you think, she is right why stay here?

"Christopher?" Edin's voice pulls your attention up and you see him by the edge of the training ground. He is looking at Stephanie with her weapons still drawn the destruction of the arena into refuse of metal slag and cooled glass. "Classes are about to start."

"He won't be going." Stephanie said not looking away from you. "Leave." Your eyes flick to her, feeling like she was being rude. She tense ready to engage but relaxes when you do.

Edin lingers a little looking between the two of you. He looked worried but walks away. When he is gone Stephanie sheathes her weapons and you go back to thinking.

More time passes and you still aren't closer. You can't think of a goal that would keep you at the academy and satisfy Stephanie.

"Lady Stephanie." Anastasia voice pulls your attention and you look up to see everyone with her. Vataire and Asune are at her side. Edin peeking around the taller women's sides. Oriana and Auria behind Vatarie, Oriana looking concern, Auria looking somewhat unsure as to why they are here, Cynthia somewhat behind Anastasia looking worried. You even see Lucia lingering a bit further back trying to not stand out among this collection of very high nobility. "Why have you had Christopher removed from the Academy?" Anastasia looked angry and you saw in her aura most of the anger was on your behalf. It was strange seeing her being angry on your behalf, you would have thought she would be angry at having her plans interfered with.

"He broke a rule and a rule without consequence is meaningless." Stephanie said clenching her hilts and keeping an eye on you, not even turning to face the Princess, you really scared her.

"What rule?" Anastasia asked as her anger changed focus at the disrespect.

"He lost a fight." Stephanie said looking over at Anastasia having heard the anger at the disrespect and not wanting to stress the situation because you are here.

"He lost because you stopped us. Once I give him permission to hurt me he is capable of winning." Asune said calmly clearly believing that resolves the issue.

"No exception." You could see Stephanie instincts trying to pull her focus back onto you, you hadn't scared her you had terrified her.

"You can't kick him out for losing one fight. Everyone loses a fight sooner or later." Vatarie said.

The group hadn't come any closer and you could see them all looking at the damage to the arena. You hadn't really shown any of them the consequences of you actually letting loose. And they looked worried for you not about you. This group that in a week you had bonded with, not just out of horny teenager, you liked them and you were going to spend your life in their company, or at least as much of it as you could. "It's good enough." You say standing up. Stephanie snaps her focus onto you and partly draws her weapons. "I want to spend time with my friends and that means staying at the academy." You see Cynthia and smile. "Even if that means going to classes I'm not invited to." Cynthia smiles a little at the mirroring of the advice you had given her.

She stares you down for a moment then relaxes entirely. Taking her hands off her weapons and smiling, "Yes it is. The goals of others can't drive you but they can." She lets out a breath. "Once you've cleaned this up you'll go back to class, the rest of you should be at your classes now." The group who came to support you look very unsure. "I will reinstate him immediately go back to your classes." Anastasia looks the most confused. She probably came here thinking she was going to be deciding factor must be more than a little weird for her to have been the tool in a lesson and not the subject or the one teaching it. "Or do you all want to be removed from the Academy?"

Stephanie's final question seemed to hit home and all but Anastasia and Vatarie hurry away with Asune taking two steps before seeing those two hadn't moved and came back. The two of them are looking conflicted and you smile at them. "I'll explain some things later." You saw to the group then look at Vatarie. "Would you be able to go on our date tonight?"

The three of them look more than a little shocked and two pairs of eyes turn to see a blushing Vatarie. "Yes, that will be fine." She says and spins hurry away as her aura jumps for joy. Yeah you really have misunderstood what a date is in this world.

Anastasia chews her lip from a moment. "We need to talk, after your date come to my estate." She turns and walk away not quite hiding the jealously in her aura as she goes.

Asune looks watches her leave then looks at Stephanie and you. "If you are removed from the academy again you will stay at my estate." She said and walked away.

"I seem to also remember a rule in regards to Lady Asune." Stephanie said looking at you.

"Ok in my defense do you really think I have much say at the start of that?" You ask.

"And now?"

You look at the devastated ground around you. "Could always remove me from the academy again." You meant it as a joke but as you said it you felt bitterness in your mouth, if it had helped you or not, Stephanie had really fucked with you.

She waited for a moment as you let the feelings and magic go. "Three days without magic, if that group hadn't turned up to **** the issue I was going to take you out of the capital until your magic had recovered then bring you back and reinstate you when you were safe. I won't be around to stop you if you lose control in class." She didn't even try to cover her fear as she spoke. "It is a privilege to teach you Christopher but you terrify me and I am sorry for that." With that she walked away leaving you to clean up.

"Hey wait isn't Three supposed to clean up after me?" You ask it but Stephanie didn't turn around. "Where do I put everything?" You looked at the charred wood of the stand. "Or get more wood, and nails, and paint, and tools?"