Ye old Hunter Q&A

Goooooood mornafternoon lassies and laddies! And welcome to the very special timespace bubble that we call the Q&A headquarters for HunterJohn’s branch. Today we have gathered all the characters in the branch in one place to answer the questions that you, the readers, have asked of my creations. They are all here, from Artemis to the Zealots, ahem, GRO. Now to introduce your host, the closest thing my branch has to a self insert. Hemet Nessingwary!

“G’day laddies! How are we all feeling? Good? Good! I will be presiding over the little Q&A so as to let Izix act like we are not all just figments of his overactive imagination.”

Hey!

“Shush, if it wasn’t true no one would enjoy yer branch, well then! The way this will go will be I pick a question, say who asked it, then the one that got asked it will answer if they want to. I see we have quite a few questions for the little critters too, that’s going to get interesting. “

“The first question is to… Izix?” No. I specified that I am not going to be answering questions, even pinged the guy about it. “Well alright then, we are tossing the question! Sorry Fredric755, better luck next time. If we are going at this pace, we will be done before you can even say mixcoatlpettingsyndrome!”

“On to our next question. This one comes from…. The patlizard himself, ladies, gentleman, a warm applause for Dargon!”

Mimi’s head cocks up, looking around curiously. “What? Dardar? Where? Dardar’s here? Lemme hug him! Dardar!? Daaardar?”

“Sorry Mimi, Dargon only sent us a question for us to answer. He isn’t really here. I bet you will find him, some day though.”

“Aw, alright then.” Mimi pouted, patting the little dragon welp that licked her face to cheer her up.

“The question is, and this is asked to anyone willing to answer. Do you like pats? I for one, am quite fond of pats, even shaved my head to make it easier.” Hemet smirked as he said that.

“Sure, it’s not that you were just going bald, right, dwarfman?” Cernunnos’ voice rang through the room, causing the dwarf to scowl. “Oh and for the record, pats are not my thing, tends to feel weird with the antlers and all.”

John and Cynthia looked at one another, nodding with a snicker. “Yeah, pats are nice.” John promptly patted Cynthia who nuzzled into his arm.

Ilis looks up from her current project. “Yeah, pats are fun, specially when getting the thinking juices flowing.”
An annoyed voice came from the bar: “Pats are… weird, when mom patted me when I was a kid it was fine but now, not so much.” It seemed Ellen was present too.

Mimi and Yatina nodded too, both patting each other on the head one with a hand ,the other with a claw. “Yaaaay, pats.”

“Pats are useful, at times, though it has been many decades since I’ve been pat, at times, I miss it.” the voice of Artemis fills the room for a moment, before the Goddess rests her head against the wall again and closes her eyes.

Pats are good. Why do you think we Gaias put up with the derp **** if not for all the pats?

“Alright then, Dargon, I hope that was answer enough for you! Let's move on to the next question!”

Our next question comes from the one and only ApplePie, great friend to Izix and writer of the ladies that make anyone want to awoo. He has a question for… Artemis, Cernunnos and myself! Who would you marry, fuck and kill of John, Arnold and Old Fred? I guess I’ll go first then, then Cern, then Artemis? Ok. Good.”

“Marry John, fuck Arnold, kill old Fred. I’ve got enough blacksmiths, not enough Gamers.”

Cernunnos cleared his throat. “Marry Arnold, fuck old Fred, kill John. Sorry kid, if I’m gonna gay it up, I’m going to gay it up with some real men.”

“Hmmm.” Artemis gave a soft hum. “Fuck John, marry Arnold, Kill Old Fred. I wonder how good that loverboy skill feels, as long as he doesn’t think he can get anything above oral, we’re good.”

“There you have it Pie, thanks for asking.Moving on!”

“Here’s a question from a lad named Panda, and he’s asking it to… Cynthia. Lass, yer up! He wants to know if you prefer the smell of bamboo or fish?”

Cynthia rubbed her chin in contemplation, her eyebrows wiggling softly as she eventually says. “Fish, but that is only because I’ve had more ‘fish’ in my life than ‘bamboo’ up till now.”

John facepalmed as he heard his girlfriend answer it, Cynthia playfully rubbing his chest as she said: “Hey, I only answered the question babe.”

“Right then, moving on!” Hemet turns to look at Artemis. “Lassie, the next question is fer you. A guy called Lance wants to know if you think John will die again, and don’t worry. None of you lot will remember this Q&A when time resumes again, so feel free to answer truthfully.”

Artemis’ steely eyes opened as she looked at John who looked right back, waiting for her to answer. “Honestly, yes. I think he will die again. However, that is the thing with mortals. They die. John learned his lesson it seems, he is improving now. So, while I think that he will die, I think it will be years in the future, when he’s old and grey. I hope that answers your question Lance.”

“If not, I’m sure we’ll hear it in the comment section.” Hemet chuckled as he already pulled up the next question. “Guess I’m staying over in this corner of the room though, seeing as the next question is fer you too. Moonblack wants to know a very intimate question. Naughty, naughty moonblack. He asks: Approximately, how many of your followers use you as masturbation material?”

“Hmmm, lets see. Divide by two, carry the one…” Artemis mumbled to herself. “Roughly eighty percent of my followers have used me as masturbation material at some point or another. The other twenty percent are either new, like John here and have not had the chance yet.” her eyes mirthfully winking at John, “Or they are so busy getting some from the other hunters that they don’t even know what masturbation is anymore. Oh and then there is Craig, who isn’t into women, but hey, to each their own right?”

“Fascinating, truly fascinating. Moonblack, I hope that answers your question then! Moving on to our next question”

“Ellen, our favorite merc. Item would like to know, if you could afford to give up the assassin’s life, what would you do for a living?”

Ellen gave a deep sigh, stretched her arms then answered. “I’d probably run a bar, a fun little place, not too big, knowing the locals and serving good beer, that would be my dream.” she then returned to looking in any direction but John’s.

Hemet walked to the bar to grab a quick pint while Ellen was responding, sipping it he opened the next enveloppe. “Cyn, John, this one is for you two, from a guy calling himself…. The flying space whale.”

Cyn and John, lost in a kiss looked up. “Oh?”

“He wants to know what your favorite date was, seeing as you have been together for only a short while but already have gone out on a few.”

John was first to react. “I think I’m going to say our first date, just getting to know Cynthia outside the hunting camp, realizing she’s a sweet little thing And what came after it will always be funny.”

“Hmmm, I think I’m going to say the park thing, the way that blonde bimbo flailed when she fell into the pond, and the happiness I could see in John’s eyes after it happened. I think that was my personal favorite. Though I think it’s sweet you liked our first date so much John.”

“And it’s funny that of all of those things, you decide that trouncing Vanessa is your favorite part,” John shot back with a chuckle.

“And while those two flirt some more, we are moving on to the next question! Here we have a question for… Moira, wait, really? Alright then! Moira, a question from Ivellius. How do you feel about the order being a non factor in this story?”

It remained silent for a few moments. Then Hemet nodded a few times. “mhm, mhm, ah ok, alright. Sorry Ivellius, it seems that Moira thought she would be wasting her time in here so she has gone home to masturbate. Well, who would have thought. Sorry, moving on!”

“Aaaaalrighy then, we have the next question here. Someone named FangOfTheWolf wants to know if John will please give Dargon pats.”

John looks confused. “Is that a question? I mean, sure, when I see him I will pat him.”

A nasal voice rings through the room “yaaaaay, future paaaaats.”

“It seems we must have passed a Dargon in our spacetime bubble guys. Good to know that there will be pats for Dargon in the future! So. Next question. A question from…. Mimi, for, Mimi. Ah, that, ok.”

Mimi perked up as she scratched Yatina under her chin while Hemet read out the question: “Me and Yaya had fun playing derp games with you and Yaya! We wanna do it again! We’ll bring s’mores!”

Just before Mimi could answer, Miranda spoke out: “Not any time soon, I can only handle one Mimi crossover once every hundred chapters or so.”

Mimi then cuts in. “But, if you bring the s’mores, maybe soon! They don’t know that we can just derp away at any time, right Yaya?” the dragon welp barks happily, licking one of the derp’s snakes in glee.

“And now, a question from our Tryxie Lewdslime. Arnold, how did you and Miranda meet? Were you both already hunters?”

“Well, Tryxie. I was there in Greece, at Artemis’ camp training with Dra when they brought in a wounded woman, I was one of the younger hunters back then and showed her around the place when she finally woke up. I guess it’s like one of those wartime romances, she never let me leave since though, hehe.”

“Ok guys, quickfire round, we are going to be going through a few questions in a rapid pace. After that, we’ll move on to a few more questions that you can actually think on ok?” when no objections came, Hemet started the questions.

“To: Artemis, from: The flying space whale, do you condone the hunting of whales?”

“I do, but only the non threatened species.”

“To: Gaia and Artemis, from: BsfDeath do you intend to let john have a dominance or People trainer skill? or are you just going to roll it into loverboy?”

No comment

“Not my jurisdiction, I am his patron Goddess, Gaia gave him his powers.”

“To: The gods, from: Ivellius, do you intend to continue the good old practice of lewding the mortals?”

“Wait, we can do that? Sign me up laddy!” Hemet cheered.

“Have done, will do and may currently be doing so right now.” Cernunnos mumbled distractedly.

“If you could only see the lesbian orgies I host… What, I’m still a virgin, need to inspect my hymen?”

I gave a guy powers that let him improve in about anything, I let those powers stretch to sex, what do you think?

To: Mimi, from: Lale, Derp?

Mimi nods sagely. “Derp.”

To: Artemis, from: Lale, does Orion exist and is he a threat to you and your hunters?

“He did exist, got killed, not a threat anymore unless Hades decides to let him out.”

To: John, from: Lale would you consider upgrading to a firearm?
“Hmmm, at some point, maybe, guns are a lot louder than bows though, even with a silencer, so… maybe.”

“And that! Concludes our quickfire round. I hope that those questions went by fast enough. Here’s what we are going to do next. First we are going to ask those questions to Toph and Jack that people kept sending in, and after that we will finish up with a few more kinky questions. So, lets, get petting!”

“First up, a question for Toph! Item would like to know if you like marshmallow peeps.”

Toph’s beady eyes look up, her claws dig at the ground for a moment, then she nods. Peeping happily as her long tongue flicks out for a moment.

“Then, a guy named bigDudeMale wants to know from Jack: Toph, smash or pass?”

Jack looks confused, clawing at his own tail before giving a very solemn: “Mew”

“There you have it BigDudeMale. Mew. I hope that answers your question.” Hemet chortled as he grabbed another pint.

“Finally, we are going to have one lewd question from Cala. It’s going to be the last one, and a big one, seeing as he too wants to ask everyone willing to answer a question. His question is: What is your greatest sexual fantasy? He stressed that, out of all people, he really wanted Ilis to answer, so let’s start with her.

Ilis looked slightly confused but blushed slightly soon after. “Ahw, that’s such an honor. Well, my biggest fantasy is to be fucked by a werewolf. It’s illegal to lay with beasts, but a werewolf is very much a person, I’ve always wondered what it would be like to take a knot… Oh my god I am so happy that everyone will forget this in a few moments.”

Ellen raised her head from the bar next. “Gangbang, dozens of hot guys filling me over and over again, no doubt about it. Just letting go and surrendering myself to the pleasure.” having said her part, she went back to ignoring John.

Cynthia nudged John as she said. “I’ll share mine, you share yours directly after ok?”

John nodded as he coughed twice. “Ahem, alright then. Before I got my powers, my biggest fantasy was to fuck a ‘big tidy goth’ ass, seeing as Val helped me achieve that, I had to change my goals. My current fantasy is to ehm… Be the first to be between Artemis’ legs. Hey, it’s fantasy!”

Artemis looked at him then simply laughed. “Many tried, many failed, but I won’t punish you for having fantasies, we all do.”

Cynthia coughed softly when she heard John’s fantasy, snickering until she found the breath to talk. “Talk about dreaming big. My fantasy is to, one day, submit to both a man and a woman, getting tied up, fucked, made to eat out a woman while I’m helpless to resist the man’s cock invading me at the same time…” Cyn shuddered and her hand went into her pants as she spoke.

John kissed her neck, whispering. “Well, I think I know someone who might be willing to help us with that.”

Valerie laughed from across the room as Hemet instinctively turned to her. “My ultimate fantasy is to find my perfect dominant. One that can make me scream in all the right ways. As for what I’d want him to do to me? Just take a look at my photobook”
Hemet nodded and then looked across the room. “Anyone else?”

Miranda raised her hand as she patted Arnold’s hand. “Seeing as the question was asked, I’m going to be honest. I would love to see Arnold fuck Cynthia while John and I have our own little fun. We swing, we’ve had fun with other couples and families before, and it made me wonder, well, what would our little Cyn look like with Arnold.”

John and Cynthia’s mouths fell open looking at each other, then at Miranda. “Hey, fantasy is fantasy baby girl. Even moms can be perverts.” Miranda teased. “Lucky for me, no one will remember this when we are done.”

The last one to raise her hand was Artemis. She smiled at Hemet, winking teasingly as she said. “My bearded friend, I think it’s only fitting that I end the Q&A with my answer. My biggest fantasy is to be worshipped by a man and his harem, tongues, fingers and toys, all centered around me. Call it a Goddess complex.”

“There ya have it lads and ladies, one hunterzix Q&A, I hope we didn’t drag it out too long, and I apologise for not answering all the questions, but ya need to quit at some point! If you really want a question answered, I bet Izix is willing to answer some in pms. Regardless. It was fun! Hemet. Out!”