Unionize

Lois Lane ran away...hurriedly throwing on clothes and then out of her apartment, away from the laughing demon on her bed. She had barely closed the door, when she grabbed her smartphone and started to make some calls...

"A whore!" Lois Lane said. "She wants to make me her own personal prostitute!"

They had assembled at Waffle House. It was the kind of situation that demanded black coffee, scrambled eggs, and that mild Casa de Waffle hot sauce that the company reserved for exclusive use in its restaurants. Assembled around her were Superman, Zatanna, Wonder Woman, the winged angel Zauriel, Raven of the Titans, and Doctor Fate.

The angel stroked his pale chin thoughtfully as the waitress refilled his cup of coffee. He murmured a web of word of thanks, sipped, and then spoke very carefully.

"Did she use those exact words?" he said. "Think carefully."

Lois blinked. She had a plate full of eggs and hashbrowns in front of her, and was about ready to dig in.

"Yes. Why?" The reporter asked.

"Demons are bound by their words," Raven said. "What she said could be taken as an oral contract. If you agree to be a sex worker, then you would fall under the rules for sex workers. We might be able to use that..."

Wonder Woman, who was eyeing a bowl of grits suspiciously, crinkled her brow. "How!?"

Zatanna popped a strawberry into her mouth. "Unions. Sex workers in Metropolis formed a union not long ago...they've been working on getting more official recognition, like in Gotham, but we have a Local Sex Workers Union in Las Vegas, too. They have lawyers...a collective bargaining agreement with brothels, set rates, hygiene requirements, group insurance. The thing about sex workers is that the union works against aggressive pimping practices...a member cannot be **** into sex acts against their will."

"Blaze is a creature bound by certain laws...even mortal laws, if used correctly. If you abide by the rules of the guild, she cannot **** you otherwise," Doctor Fate said.

Lois Lane sat back.

"So...if I join the union. Officially become a prostitute. My union rep can get her to back off? What about the...addiction?" It sounded so weird to hear the words come out of her own mouth.

"Blaze is mistaken about that," Raven said. "Ingesting demon seed awakens a need for semen in the victim, but it doesn't specifically have to be succubus seed. Any form of semen will help assuage the hunger. There is no direct cure for it, but as long as you ingest a modest amount on a regular basis, your addiction should be...manageable."

Half the eyes at the table looked at Superman. Wonder Woman pointedly elbowed the silent Kryptonian in the ribs. The Man of Steel coughed and blushed politely.

"I...would be happy to help, if I can."

It was Lois Lane's turn to blush...but then, she realized, none of these people were judging her. Maybe this was a legitimate way to handle things.