Under the diving board

The dog takes a turn left and runs through under the 3m diving board. "Hey!", a female voice behind you screams. "No running here!" You turn your head around. "Sorry!", you shout back. You turn back around and BAM! you ram your head into a lower hanging metal patt of the diving board- at full speed! You're instantly losing your consciousness...

You're opening your eyes again. "Ohhh", you moan, your head is hurting. You're lying on your back, and lots of pretty girls, mostly naked, have gathered around you and stare at your body. Your hand is reaching on your belly, all naked. Reaching even further and you're feeling a tiny nipple-like thing. Below it a small nutsack. Yep, these are your testicles. Is that tiny thing- your penis? You quickly raise your head and stare down. You're lying here butt naked, with a body THAT embarrassing? But even worse...

"Who am I?"