This is Singapore suites, Jerry Springer war freaks

“So, Mary!” Sylvia took the redhead by the arm and led her towards the door. “Are you ready for your bachelorette party?”

Mary just groaned.

Even with Kim coming to join them, today had been long and brutal. Not only had they needed to finalize all the wedding plans (which they had managed to do, somehow) but they had also planned out a bachelorette party for her, too. She was exhausted, quite frankly, and wanted to go to bed.

Is wedding planning always this stressful? She wondered, hanging her head and sighing.

“Come on, Mary, we can do it!” Kim cheered, punching the air. She looked invigorated and her skin was glowing from the hot spring.

“I’m so excited!” Holly was bubbling with anticipation. “But you guys are sure about the no strippers, thing, right? Even if they were Nick clones?”

A silence fell over the room as everybody contemplated that possibility.

“I-I want to be chaste on my wedding eve!” Mary replied, but the hot blush on her cheeks signaled that she’d been considering that idea rather heavily herself.

“But we are still going to have a party, though?” Rose asked, just to be sure. If Mary was calling it quits, then there might still be time to go to Nick’s bachelor party instead.

Mary **** a smile to her lips and nodded. “Yeah… you’re right, we should have that party,” she agreed, shoving Sylvia’s arm off of her.

Because things like strip clubs (and regular clubs) were off the table, the options they had were very limited.

But at the same time, Sylvia had all the power they could need.

With a tap of her cane, the room began to shift and spin, and the six of them were wiped away.

Like a rubber band snapping back into place, the world around them refocused in a second, and they were no longer in the planning room. They weren’t even in the hotel any longer.

They were standing outside of a large white villa built on the side of a cliff. It was a fancy, chic looking building that wouldn’t have seemed out of place as the summer vacation home of a multi-millionaire, and the sun setting on the horizon cast it in a violet-orange glow.

“Tres magnifique,” Rose breathed in amazement.

“Welcome, my girls!” Sylvia chirped. “To a very special part of our island, reserved only for our most special, private guests! You might even consider it a private part of the island!”

She snorted at her terrible joke and other girls rolled their eyes. Except for Holly. Of course Holly would be the one to laugh.

Dawn made a face. “…Oh. This place.”

“You’ve been here before?” Morgana asked, her eyes widening in amazement. While the color scheme might not have been her style, not even she could deny how fancy the building was.

“Something like that,” the veterinarian groused. “Back during the second challenge, we scoured the entire island looking for these playing cards… whatever. It doesn’t matter.” She turned to Sylvia. “Where the heck did this thing come from? There was a log cabin here just a few weeks ago.”

Sylvia blinked. “…Gentrification,” she answered.

Dawn sputtered in disbelief. “Gentrification?! Are you serious?”

“Dawn? Dawn?” Holly patted her on the back. “Just let it go.”

“Okay, fine,” Sylvia scoffed, rolling her eyes. “The truth is, this here is what’s called the Proximity Palace.”

“Proxi-what?” Rose wasn’t sure she heard that right.

“Think of it as a special building that serves a very special need!” Sylvia chirped. “It’s sentient! And it transforms to suit the desire of anyone who stays in it. For example…”

She tapped her cane, and the villa transformed into a gorgeous medieval castle. Then she tapped it again, and it turned into a skyscraper.”

“Nice!” Holly grinned cheekily. “Can you turn it into a sex dungeon, then?”

Dawn gently swatted her on the back of the head.

“Ow!”

“We can turn it into whatever you like!” Sylvia boasted. The building turned into a strip club next. Then the Taj Mahal. A rusty outhouse. A nice little house in the suburbs with a white picket fence.

“Ooh, that one’s nice!” Mary whistled.

But another tap of the cane sent it back to the fancy villa.

“We’re thinking about offering it up as an incentive!” Sylvia explained. “Just think, one night with the master in a place like this… well. We’ll work out the details later,” she hummed. “For now, I think it’s the best place for you girls to hold your bachelorette party!”

“Conveniently located far away from Nick’s bachelor party, and whatever shenanigans they might be getting up to,” Rose said, raising her eyebrow. “What a surprise…”

“It’s okay, I trust him,” Mary assured the blonde. “Besides, there’s not a lot that he could do anyway; it’s not like he doesn’t have permission to sleep with other women.”

Rose opened her mouth to reply, but then thought better of it. She nodded. “I suppose you raise a good point,” she admitted.

“And Mary, you’re sure this is what you want?” Holly asked, just trying to make sure. “Us girls just hanging out and having fun in a private villa?”

For a regular party back on earth, that would have been amazing. But given they had the near-infinite amount of possibilities that the Harem Hotel wanted (to say nothing of the Proximity Palace’s possibilities itself) a night of hanging out in a villa seemed rather… vanilla.

But then, it was Mary.

“Now, now, be nice!” Sylvia patted the villa’s door like she was soothing an upset pet. “I think you’ll find that this little place has all the amenities you could hope for!”

“See? I told you it was worth it, inviting her,” Rose whispered to Mary.

Mary sighed and rolled her eyes. “You’ve made your sale, Sylvia, we’re having the party here. I already decided.”

“Brilliant!” Sylvia was aglow with excitement. She could finally be a part of things! Morgana had received an invite to the party, it was only fitting that Sylvia tag along, too!

They’re really starting to come around to me, she thought with a warm smile as she opened the doors to the villa for the other girls to enter.

She refused to let the thought that she was being used worm its way into her mind.

Rose whistled again as they entered the villa. It was nice on the outside, but the inside was even better. Fancy furniture covered the marble tile floor, and gorgeous works of art hung from the walls. A massive chandelier hung from the second story, illuminating the living space with a soft glow of light. It was comparable in loveliness to the Master’s Suite, only without the tacky gold coloring everywhere.

Sylvia was happy to walk the girls through their new accommodations.

“The villa is two stories with a rooftop lounge, and comes with four bedrooms and three baths. And unlike the Hotel, these are private bedrooms, although each comes with a king-sized double. It has amenities for four people, but I’m sure you ladies are used to doubling up,” she said with a wink. “Out that door is the patio deck, which comes fully furnished with a grill, lounge chairs, and an infinity pool. There’s also spiral staircase down to a private beach, if you’d like to get some swimming in. But I think you won’t have the time.”

“Not like there’s anything else planned,” Holly muttered under her breath. “Like Nick strippers.”

“Just be grateful you aren’t sleeping in a cage and take the win,” Dawn said.

“I like my cage!” Holly replied with a pout.

Dawn rolled her eyes.

“Shall we take a look in the bedrooms?” Sylvia stopped at the stairs and cocked out her hip, flashing a smile like she was trying to sell a house. “Right this way, my girls.”

She led them up the winding staircase to the second floor.

“There are two bathrooms downstairs and one up here, along with the bedrooms,” Sylvia said. “It may get a bit cramped late at night, but that’s just part of this villa’s charm!”

Dawn narrowed her eyes suspiciously. She had a good feeling that the reason the other two bathrooms were down a flight of stairs was to encourage some late-night “accidents”. The fact that the bathroom didn’t have a lock turned that suspicion into a certainty.

Sylvia led them into the first bedroom. “The others all have the same design, with almost the same view.”

“This bed is massive!” Holly flopped onto the bed, expecting to bounce right off it. Instead, she sank into the mattress’s embrace like a warm hug.

“Oh, and there’s even a chocolate on the pillow,” Morgana noted, picking up the small candy.

Dawn placed her hand over Morgana’s before the younger girl could unwrap it. She shook her head.

“Don’t try it.”

“But-!”

“Just don’t.”

She knew all about Sylvia’s tricks. Those Adicktion Patches were the last straw; now she wouldn’t trust anything the host offered ever again.

“Ladies, there’s a whole other ROOM in here!” Rose called from the door on the far wall. “I thought this was just a closet, but no! Come take a look!”

The other girls followed her into the side room, which was just as massive as the sleeping quarters. Maybe even more so. Like the Master’s Suite, it had its own kitchen space, and a mini bar (as in, an actual bar) comfy couches, and a wide-screen TV. If only there was a bathroom like in the Master’s Suite, one could spend their whole life there if they wanted to do so.

“Pretty nice,” Kim had to admit.

“And all the rooms are like this?” Holly asked, surprised. “Why don’t we just live here instead of the hotel then?” Her cage was already forgotten.

“There’s an identical floor plan for all the rooms, yes,” Sylvia confirmed with a nod. “The bedrooms and the bathroom make up the entirety of the second floor, in fact. Shall we head back down?”

Rather than head back towards the stairs, Sylvia led them to the other side of the room. “To finish things off, each room comes with a wrap-around balcony that connects all four of the rooms together! In case anyone might be interested in some late-night fun.”

She gave the girls a saucy wink.

Kim peeked out the glass door to the balcony and saw that it did indeed stretch out across all four rooms. Pretty cool design, she had to admit. And the view was nice.

“You can take those stairs over there down to the outdoor deck,” Sylvia said, pointing a few feet down the walk. “We’re all about convenience here!”

They took the wooden stairway down to the patio, which was quite an amazing sight. Kim felt the breath escape her lungs.

“I know what you mean, Holly,” Morgana said, just as amazed. “I would love to live here!”

It may have needed a few gothic touch-ups, but even someone like her who favored antiquity in design could appreciate the beauty of the modern flares.

The outdoor patio deck was covered in a wide roof with wooden slats, letting in just the right amount of sunlight. Indeed, there was a grill, but Sylvia had definitely undersold it. You could cook an entire cow on that thing! It sat at the end of a giant bar, with a shelf that must have stocked every type of liquor known to man. Gina would have certainly gone into a conniption fit over seeing this!

“Are these tables crystal?” Dawn asked, running her finger along the clear surface. “Excellently-carved, if that’s true.”

“Good eye,” Sylvia said, smiling proudly. “And these chairs were hand-carved by one of our finest artisans!” They were made of soft maple wood, and felt warm to the touch.

Most impressive of all, though, was the wide infinity pool that wrapped around the length of the patio, going from wall to wall, with water cascading down the sides to give off the effect that the pool would never end. And a tiny bridge led over one side of the pool, connected to a staircase that led down to the beach just like what was promised.

“Gotta say, this is a great place to have a party,” Rose grinned. “I always dreamed of living in a place like this.”

“Me too…” Kim agreed. The two women looked at each other and shared a laugh.

Holly glanced over at Mary. She had been rather quiet for a while.

“Is everything okay?” She asked her friend. “You seem pretty quiet. You don’t like it?”

Mary shook her head quickly. “No, no, it’s not that!” She said. “Not at all! It’s just… it’s all kind of sinking in now, how real this is.”

She was getting married. She was actually getting married. Because of the urgency of the ceremony, she hadn’t had time to really think about it. She’d been too busy making plans and perfecting the designs of everything that she hadn’t had a moment to stop and breathe.

Now she did.

And it was real.

A giddy smile spread across her lips.

“Oh my gosh,” she squealed. “I’m getting married tomorrow!”

Holly broke out into a fit of laughter as well, and Morgana joined in as well. Rose tittered and Kim and Dawn both smiled.

“I’m glad to see you’re excited,” Sylvia said, clapping gently. “Tomorrow is certainly going to be a great day. But until then, we have… tonight!”

With a flourish, Sylvia beckoned to the patio door.

“There’s more?” Rose couldn’t believe her ears. Was this how all rich people lived? Maybe that Gold Digger path of hers wasn’t as bad as she thought.

“When I win, I’m going to buy my family a house like this,” Kim vowed. “My siblings would love to play here!”

“As I said before, the villa is two stories,” Sylvia continued. “We could go to the rooftop lounge, but just to be clear, when I say a lounge I mean… something a bit more intimate.”

“Oh, what a surprise,” Dawn scoffed.

“There are all sorts of G-rated activities to enjoy, though, don’t you girls worry.” Sylvia led them into the main living area again. “Through that door is a private theater with massage chairs and a flat-screen just as big as the one in the Master’s Suite, for starters, and another kitchen over that way. You can have as much food as you like! The villa has its own faerie staff for these purposes!”

“That’s a relief,” Holly sighed, relaxing a little. “I thought I’d have to cook for everybody!” She elbowed Mary in the side. “I guess we get the night off on that front, huh?”

“Yeah, guess so,” Mary agreed, flashing a smile.

“Come this way, and I’ll show you what other amenities we have available,” Sylvia urged the girls, leading them down the hall. “I showed you the necessities, but now we’ll get to check out the leisure activities!”

The first room they came across set the tone.

“A bowling alley,” Mary said bluntly, not sure what else to make of it. “The villa has a private bowling alley.”

There was a private, two-lane bowling alley behind the door, with a counter for changing shoes and a rainbow of different-colored bowling balls on the wall.

“That’s correct, yes,” Sylvia said, nodding. “You girls can have all the fun you like, bowling away! Isn’t that a blast? Plus, since it’s private, nobody will say a word if you just pick up Holly and give her the old heave-ho into the pins!”

“Hey!” Holly scowled.

“Okay, but do any of us even like bowling?” Dawn asked.

“Not particularly, but I’ve never done it before,” Rose admitted. “It might be fun to try it out! You’re supposed to aim for those pin things, right?”

Dawn opened her mouth to rebuke the actress for her foolish statement, but then reconsidered. After all, she had never tried bowling either. Well, except for that one time on a school field trip, but that hadn’t exactly been fun. She could still remember the stink of that place.

“This is probably the nicest bowling alley I’ve ever been in,” Kim said, looking around at the shining lanes. “Totally different from the place I worked at.”

“Why am I not surprised?” Dawn said, rolling her eyes.

“Like, this place smells like… well, nothing. And that’s the best part,” Kim laughed. “No sweat, no foot stink, no chili cheese dogs… okay, well, that one I’ll miss. But I’m not going to miss mopping vomit off the lanes, I’ll tell you that.”

“You sure?” Rose grinned. “We are going to be drinking tonight, after all,” she pointed out.

Kim patted Holly on the head. “That’s fine, it’s what we’ve got our little maid here for, after all.”

“Nah, I’m Nick’s ****, not yours,” she fired back. “You want to give me orders, how about you girls get to marrying him?”

If she had a mic to drop, she would have.

Mary cleared her throat, reminding Holly of why they were here in the first place.

“Oh, I didn’t mean you, Mary!” Holly gushed. “Of course, you can give me whatever orders you wish!”

“Boo!” Morgana booed. “Bias!”

“I’m with the goth girl on this one,” Rose agreed. “Equal treatment for harem members!”

Holly just smirked in response.

Sylvia cleared her throat.

“The bowling alley is only the first of our villa’s many exciting sights,” she promised. “There are all sorts of fun activities to be had! Next, to the gaming room!”

“Video games?” Morgana perked up at that.

“No, no need for such things,” Sylvia assured her. “Although, of course, you can order whatever you like from one of the servants, if you’re in the mood for-”

“Sex games?!” Holly blurted out.

Sylvia turned to her with an incredulous look on her face.

“…Okay, Holly, LOVE the enthusiasm, but come on. You’re killing me here. Not everything needs to be about sex.”

“You’re saying that?” Dawn raised her eyebrow.

Sylvia opened her mouth to reply, and then shut it tight. She turned and walked to the next room.

“Here, we have all sorts of games you can play,” she said, opening the door to a massive rec room. “Air hockey, foosball, billiards, darts, that one game with the hippos and marbles, whatever you like, we’ve got it.”

“Whoa, is that a life-size chess board?!” Dawn marveled in amazement. “That’s so badass!”

“Now who’s the one getting too eager?” Mary laughed. Dawn turned red and calmed down, but her flicking tail betrayed her actual feelings on the subject.

“It’s a pity Nick didn’t come,” Rose murmured, walking over to the pool table and picking up a cue. She twirled it between her fingers like a baton and sat up on the table, posing seductively with her hip cocked and her boobs out as if the target of her affections was in the room with her. “I’d have loved to have some fun with him.”

“They have poker, too,” Holly noted, walking over to the card table. “Anyone for strip poker?”

She ducked out of the way of the air hockey puck Mary flung at her.

“I’m not playing with Dawn, she can definitely count cards,” Rose said. “Not a chance.”

“It’s not even that difficult,” Dawn scoffed. “But I don’t gamble.”

She looked at the other things in the room. “This is a rec room, but it seems almost like a casino,” she said, taking note of the slot machines and the roulette wheel. “That seems rather odd.”

Sylvia cleared her throat. “Yes, well, while we were furnishing this place, I got some leftover props from one of the other running seasons. Hosts gotta stick together, you know?”

That admission brought to mind the idea that Sylvia was working on a budget, which was rather amusing to picture.

“Shall we get to the next room, then?” She asked cheerily. “I think you’ll enjoy it quite a bit!”