The warnings

On the bottom of the bottle, there was a tiny strip of black ink, so small he couldn't read it. It was only under a magnifying glass that the print became clearer, though some text still remained scratched and unreadable. What words Valentino could make out seemed to spell out a number of warnings. The first few were rather standard, self-explanatory things.

• Keep out of reach of children and pets
• Do not ingest with fluids other than water
• Do not ingest if packaging is broken
• Do not ingest if tablet is broken

But then there were some stranger warnings, oddly specific.

• Do not allow broken tablet contact with skin
• Do not ingest directly before sleep
• Do not insert tablets into orifices other than mouth
• Ingest only 20 minutes after eating beef
• Do not take with dietary supplements
• Do not take with any other form of drug
• For male use only

And then, after the long line of tiny black print that made his head hurt, were the final 3 warnings. Printed in red, all capitals, and a sense of urgency in the prefacing 'DO NOT'... and they were unreadable. Scratched off, probably by some careless delivery lady, or his spiteful sister. Valentino glanced between the long list of warnings and the pills in his hand.

Were they really worth the risk of unknown consequences?