The unsung hero

The sun is approaching the horizon mercilessly. Worried Patroklos looks over the open field in front of him and beyond that on the high almost impenetrable walls of the city. Hopefully the plan would work and they could lure the Trojans out of their walls and into the open field. If they could defeat the garrison, the walls would no longer pose a problem.

Next to him, Achilles sits down in his usual grumpy mood. It had gotten worse ever since this war started. “This plan is bullshit” His lover begins, “and the king’s an asshole. I’m not going to risk my life, when we could just starve them out. They don’t have infinite supplies in there, we could just wait. You shouldn’t fight either.” Patroklos shrugs in response. “We don’t have a choice, do we? If we, no, If you don’t fight tomorrow, the others won’t believe in victory and we will lose. If you do we have a chance.”

“Then let them lose. We can always just leave. If they lose here they won’t be able to hunt us down anymore. We could spend the rest of our lives together sitting under a tree and eating figs and kissing until we fall asleep. Why is it so important for you to fight?”

“Because it is expected of us. We are soldiers, we fight. Even if you don’t want to, at least let me. Give me your armour and I will be perfectly safe. And the others will think it’s you and be motivated to fight as if it was you.”

“Maybe. I don’t want to decide today. Hopefully the Trojans don’t take the bait. Then all of this won’t even be an issue. But if they do, we should go to sleep. Whether we run or we fight, we will need all the rest we can get. Goodnight my Love.”

“Goodnight, Achilles.”

That night Patroklos’s dreams are weird, a collection of shapes and letters flying around, coming together and dispersing again, forming strange patterns seemingly at random until eventually some of them form into a word: ἀνδρεία.

Then he wakes up, clearly no longer in his tent, but instead in a sandy arena in the middle of the day. Strangely none of the usual left-over exhaustion from his sleep is present. He spits out a bit of sand, that had gotten into his mouth, before standing up and looking around. In front of him there is a small group of people, and angry looking woman, a scared middle-aged man, and a confident older man, giving a bow like an actor.

From Chris’ perspective it looks like the young man just appeared in the middle of the pit of sand. Wearing something that looked similar to the reconstructions of Greek Toga’s he had once made with his students. They had even gotten a reward for those.

Despite still being sceptical of the entire premise of this Harem Hotel business, Chris had to admit to himself that the man that was rising out of the sand in front of him is undeniably attractive. Toned muscles clearly visible on every part of the figure’s body accentuate a in contrast soft face. His kind olive-green eyes are framed by short, curly, black hair and a stubble on his chin.

“Please welcome, the unsung Hero of the Trojan war, Patroklos, the tragic figure no one ever thinks of. Well except maybe the master, but he is kind of an expert.”

“Tragic figure? Unsung hero?”, the newcomer responds, “I’m not fighting for glory, but those titles are not the ones I thought I would get.”

“Well, you aren’t there yet, we pulled you out before it could get that far, but it’s what the audience knows you as. Really you should be thanking us for the opportunity to compete in this season of Harem Hotel, where you and five other contestants will be fighting for a favourable spot in the master’s harem.”

“I’m sorry, but I will have to decline that questionable honour. I have prior commitments that prevent me from participating in any sort of harem. Not even the gods themselves could make me betray Achilles.”

“Luckily I am above the gods as Athena here can attest to, so it shouldn’t be a problem for me. But hey, chin up, the master isn’t half bad himself. He’s already wise, despite his young age. I bet if you asked him, he could tell you how to get through those impenetrable Trojan walls.”

For the first time since he woke up Patroklos’s expression changes. A few wrinkles appear on his forehead and his eyes glance to Athena before he lowers them. “So, what you are saying is, that I have to compete in this farce. Why should I?”

“That will be explained later, for now it will suffice for you to introduce yourself to the audience.”

Reluctantly Patroklos turns to the stands: “I am Patroklos, Soldier in the Greek Army against the Trojans, and I will return to my Lover Achilles once I have found a way to do so.”

The old man laughs.” I’d advise against that for multiple reasons, but I don’t think that will be a possibility. Anyways, one question’s left open still; Are you a virgin?”

“Huh? No, did you miss the part about Achilles? Another reason why I am unfit to be part of any Harem.”

“Just wanted to make sure. Now you can sit down next to Athena and wait, we still have four more contestants to get through.”

Patroklos raises an eyebrow at that, but still moves to sit down in the slowly forming semicircle. In a small act of rebellion, he seats himself on the other side of Chris, instead of next to Athena, though Homer doesn’t seem to mind.

“Are you really Athena?”, he asks the goddess, who opens her mouth still irate, but fails to produce a sound

“Yes, she is, but the old guy took her voice away. No idea how, but he is dangerous. I know I have a relatively comfortable position, but I don’t think we can do anything about it.” Chris whispers to the other man.

“You are right, you do have it comfortable. If I were in your position, I wouldn’t be looking too hard for an out either.”

“Hey, do you think I enjoy sitting next to a goddess who will kill me or that I want her in whatever harem thing he got going on. I have exactly as little control over anything as you do.”

“I doubt that”, Patroklos turns away, clearly done with the conversation. Meanwhile Athena Is still trying her best to yell something, without having any success.

Only a few metres away from them, the Host has already moved on and has turned back to the audience: “ And now for contestant number three, it’s not her first time being kidnapped, it’s…..”