The World as Myth, by GamerChick077

Two and a half years ago in Let’s Survive, by Auracide

“It's another game type story. This time it's based on the popular RPG video game series Shin Megami Tensei.”

“Is this the one with Donald Duck?”

“No, Gina, it's not the one with Donald Duck.”

“There goes any fleeting interest I had.”

“Today we are reading The World as Myth, by GamerChick077 let’s get into it.”

“Someone’s suspiciously eager.”

“You see why, Gina, you see.”

READING IN PROGRESS (BGM)

"Whatever, I don't have work today, so I can fight along with you," I said, "Hey, Felix, how about we go a quick round on Mario Kart 8?"

"Okay, you're on!" Felix said.

I sat down in front of the TV with Felix. I selected Bowser. Felix went for Link.

3, 2, 1, Go!

We both completed the first lap at the same time.

But in the end, I won.

"Hey, how 'bout..." I said.

"The usual?" Felix finished.

"Let's do it!"

This meant Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. I selected the character was Sephiroth.

"I'll go with Cloud Strife. Actually, I choose Sora," Felix said.

And with that, we began our battle. Felix just ran at me. I jumped out the way, causing him to fall into a stage hazard.

I'll skip ahead to the next part of the match I remember. I attacked Felix but he used his shield. Last time, he had his shield up for too long until it burst. I was expecting him to make that mistake again. Instead, he took his shield down and hit me with his key blade, sending me nearly flying off the screen. I landed close to the edge of the platform. I finished Felix off with a Supernova.

“Oh my fucking goooooood! Who caaaaaaaares!”

“This is why I wanted to start early, Gina. We have a lot of...this to go through.”

“This is the first fucking chapter and it’s just the most boring garbage ever! There are fifty of these fucking things, Marcie! Fifty fucking chapters!”

“Well, they aren’t getting any shorter if you keep interrupting.”

“So what the fuck is this shit, Marcie? Some nerds playing videogames?

“Nope, this is figuratively Kingdom Hearts.”

“What?”

“The one with Donald Duck in it.”

“Ohhhh!”

“Good for you, Gina.”

“Alright, so this is the story of three nerds, Duncan, Felix and Dawn, two boys, one girl who just sit around playing videogames all day when suddenly they get send to another dimension and get attacked by shadow..”

“Let me stop you right there, Gina. This is essentially just the plot of Kingdom Hearts, which is the most convoluted, pretentious garbage ever conceived. We will do everyone a favor by not even attempting to explain it.”

“Look Marcie, all I know is that Donald Duck is in it. That’s enough for me.”

He struck every shadow creature that came our way, relishing in the fact he could now kill them.

I envied him.

“This story is so edgy, you will cut yourself just by reading it.”

After dying on what my new mother calls Earth-1218, I was reborn in this new world as a catboy.

“This is how the second fucking chapter starts! Why did we have to slog through that shitty first chapter then? Just open with the fucking catboy!”

“Because it happens in Kingdom Hearts, Gina. You will find that this is a rather derivative work.”

I turned and walked into the room to see some amazon training taking place. A young woman was chained naked to a wheel by her wrists and ankles, her hair flipped over her shoulder, so her back was completely exposed. She was being whipped on her back by another naked woman. She cried out as the whip lashes her back mercilessly and her boobs shake violently. Twenty fine red stripes decorated the girl's back in a crisscross pattern.

“Took her all of two chapters this time.”

“sigh…”

He was dressed in black with several belts covering his body. In his hand was a sword with a gun's trigger. With a fair bit of muscle and a cold exterior, this man looked almost imposing.

"You don't know what you're getting into," he said.

"Oh yeah? Don't be so sure."

"This isn't a game."

"Doesn't matter."

“Very edgy, too bad it’s said by a catboy.”

“In my headcanon, Duncan is wearing a french maid uniform.”

“Who the fuck even names their child Duncan?”

“Wanna know the funny part, Gina?”

“No.”

“Duncan originated from scottish it is derived from two Gaelic words - “donn” which means brown, and “cath” which means warrior.”

“Huh. That’s rather clever.”

“A bit too clever for this author, so she probably just ripped the name off from this.”

“Especially since the other catboy fucker is named Felix.”

“And speaking of that other, ehem, catboy fucker, we switch to him because he is the actual protagonist of this story and yes he is also a catboy. He run’s around in a bunny girl outfit.”

“Marcie, what the fucks wrong with you?”

“Fantasizing about crossdressing catboys is the only way I can possible make it through this story, Gina.”

I have no idea who my birth parents were. I grew up with a eurasian girl named Amaya Smith, a catgirl named Phoenix Storm and another girl named Skye Hickam, as well as Skye's dad.

“How many of these characters will actually end up mattering?”

“Not a single one, Gina, not a single one.”

Suddenly, the Chainsaword appeared in my hand. It was the very same weapon that appeared before me eighteen years ago.

“pffft…”

“Marcie…”

“Come on, that pun is so bad it’s good!”

“No.”

“I also have to give the author credit for NOT screwing up “Chainsaword” even once. An impressive feat.”

except for the presence of parasitic orgasms that tried to take over her world.

“And sadly not one that she repeats very often.”

“The funny freudian slips the author makes throughout the story are the best thing about it.”

So many awful movies.

Avengers: The Secret Empire, released in 2040. By that point we'd lost all the good characters. And it was an adaption of one of the worst storylines in the comics. By this point, Marvel had stopped producing comic books altogether and were relying entirely on the MCU. Even Kamala Khan, Carol Danvers, America Chavez and Riri Williams had been replaced with even woker versions of themselves.

Female Pirates of the Caribbean: You're a Sexist If You Don't See It, released in 2048. I know they had used the same marketing tactic as the last time they tried to make a female Jack Sparrow happen, but they weren't even trying to be subtle this time.

Fast and Furious 19, released in 2052. The movie had Dominic Toretto's daughter car chasing aliens in space. At least this one wasn't woke.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 10, released in 2053. Gamora and Nebula had become a lesbian couple (never mind that they're sisters), though their lesbianism was edited out for the Chinese release. The whole thing had gone downhill since Chris Pratt left.

Another Disney live action remake, this time of Bambi, released in 2054. Of course, the owl was turned gay. Why an owl would be gay, I don't know. His homosexuality was edited out for the Chinese release.

Then we have all shows the Disney++ shows.

Lucasfilm had given up on Star Wars movies and decided to just keep releasing Disney++ shows, the Book of Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Yoda, were all a bait-and-switch that ended up actually being about completely different characters to what was advertised.

The Spider-Woman show sucked, filled with the usual feminist talking points and they adapted the pregnancy arc in the first season. And Luke Cage was retconned into being gay.

Quicksilver was just bait for his own replacement. Obviously Disney didn't have much faith that new female Quicksilver, so they brought back Aaron Taylor-Johnson just to prop up the new character before being anal to by MODOK. In a kids show. And is Donald Trump even relevant in 2054?

“UUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“Gina please.”

“I CAN’T FUCKING TAKE IT ANYMORE, MARCIE! THIS IS SO FUCKING SHIT!”

“H-hey, just calm down, deep breaths, deep breaths.”

“WHY THE FUCK ARE WE TALKING ABOUT FICTIONAL MOVIES NOW! LIKE WHAT THE FUCK! HOW IS THIS RELEVANT AT ALL!”

“Oh hey look we made it to chapter five! We are 10% through!”

“…”

“...yay?”

Now let me tell you something about Fantasy World.

“What the fuck did you think you were doing this entire time, bucko? You gave us a fucking history lesson on this worlds fucking movies!”

It contains all kinds of creatures, and not just mythological ones, but ones that were entirely fictional. I even saw a Moogle from Final Fantasy, walking nonchalantly down the street among the other, human-looking people.

“I mean, yes? We gathered as much from context already. There was really no reason to relay this information to us again.”

"By the way..." I could hear gramps say, "Skye, I've been told you were stealing again. Take off your clothes and get over the table."

“Oh no.”

“Don’t worry Gina. It’s just another whipping scene.”

“Then some more anime bullshit happens. You will find me using this term a lot because I will not describe the twenty billion time Felix fights some variation of shadows.”

The blue Oni had a narrow white horn protruding from the centre of her forehead. She had long white hair tied into a ponytail and a toned but slender and voluptuous body with massive breasts. She wore a metal breastplate and gauntlets, a skirt and black boots.

The red Oni had long wavy black hair and two narrow black horns protruding from her forehead. She was dressed in blue robes. Atop her head was a blue hat, similar to a stereotypical witch that had two holes where her horns stuck out.

“These two are our stand ins for Donald and Goofy.”

“So, what you are trying to tell me, Marcie, is that Donald Duck isn’t in this story after all?”

“...it appears so.”

“….”

“But you know what is in it, Gina?”

"Okay?" I said, confused, "How should I punish the blue Oni? Will spanking do?"

“I guess I don’t really want to see Donald Duck spanked.”

“Although that is certainly some people’s fetish. We can count ourselves lucky the author did not decide to genderbent Donald and Goofy.”

“So more anime bullshit happened, not Donald has a space ship and they are trying to find Duncan and Dawn and bla bla bla. Bottom line the land on an Alice in wonderland themed planet.”

“We have some wacky shenanigans but it is all very ho hum. I have a hard time even describing just what exactly is bothering me with it.”

“Oh look a non spanking/whipping sex scene! Did that happen in the movie?”

“Ah, thanks for the pivot, Gina. That makes it easier.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“See, they are at the Mad Hatter’s tea party and are having sex on the table because reasons. The one comment we are getting from the Mad Hatter about this table manners faux pas is:”

The Hatter clapped his hands, "It's been a while since someone put up such a show. But the Queen of Hearts has ordered me to keep you from reaching her."

“uhu.”

“Of course the Mad Hatter would enjoy this. That is perfectly in character. But what comes after? A riddle contest, which Felix wins and they move on. Not only did the sex amount to nothing what followed after was once again just going through the motions. It is just so dreadfully dull.”

“uhu”

“Why don’t they have a crazy tea party orgy, where they have to impress the mad hatter with different sex positions? Just anything beyond the most basic stuff!”

“uhu.”

“Gina…”

“Oh, I am sorry, I try to get through this with the least amount of mental damage possible. So now they are at a castle and the queen is a bitch and wants to them or something? Cool. Cool.””

“How much do you want to bet the queen of hearts is getting a whipping, Gina?”

“I’m not betting on things I have no chance of winning.”

“Tough, because I need some entertainment to make it through this, so if the queen gets whipped, you are getting a spanking as punishment.”

“What the fuck!”

“But if she doesn’t get whipped you can spank me as much as you want for the rest of the week. Sounds fair?”

“No, because you have zero fucking chance of losing!”

“Oh please…this is a totally fair and square bet, I even spend the rest of the week as your .”

In front of the stand was a slender ghostly pale girl with shoulder length blonde hair that had been pushed over her shoulder, exposing her back. Standing naked, her wrists were bound in chains between two columns. She cried out with each lash of the whip. The card behind her swung the whip again and again, blooding the pale expanse of flesh on Alice's back.

“Fuck you!”

“Gina please. Just because Alice gets a whipping doesn’t mean the queen of hearts will get whipped. Won’t you give this author the benefit of the doubt?”

“Not after...what the fuck is this even? Some Law and Order bullshit?”

“That Gina, is an Ace Attorney spoof. It is not a very good Ace Attorney spoof since it basically just takes the first case and changes some words but this is what the author is aiming for.”

“I hate Ace Attorney now, whatever it is.”

“If this author had any more talent this spoof could have worked. You know maybe turn the cross examination into a mini game where you have to pick different choices on what part of the testimony you take issue with.”

“That would require effort, Marcie.”

“So, we are having an ace attorney spoof that amounts to nothing, since in the end it just devolves into a battle against the queen and her army of cards.”

“Marcie is making this sound more entertaining then it actually is. And it already sounds fucking boring when she’s describing it.”

"Off with your own head!" I said, slicing the queen's head off.

“…ah”

“BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“W-well, Gina c-come on, let’s be reasonable…”

“Fuck you! Get naked right now, you...”

The queen's eyes opened, "OFF WITH HIS HEAD!"

“Phew. I was getting scared there for a second.”

“Fuck!"

After much talks, it was decided that the queen's brother would take over. Since he was still a baby, their mother, the Duchess, would serve as an acting queen until he was old enough to rule. I introduced the kingdom to soccer and we used the queen's still living head as the ball.

“Wow, that is kinda even more messed up.”

“I don’t care how messed up it is. It’s not a whipping. I win.”

“They might still whip the body. What’s a bit of to this author?”

“You’re not getting out of this one, Marcie.”

“Gina, we are all reasonable adults here...”

“GET NAKED!”

.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈*¨¨*:·. INTERMISSION.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈*¨¨*:·.

“Got to hand it to you, Marcie. You really know how to make this shitty story more entertaining.”,Gina chirped happily.

Marcie was currently on Gina’s lap, clad only in a pair of Disney princess panties and the only reason she was allowed to wear them was so that Gina could wedgie her girlfriend/mortal enemy in periodic intervals.

Unfortunately, the panties did nothing to protect Marcie’s butt from the harsh spanking Gina had unleashed upon her .

Gina admired the nice red sheen, Marcie’s buttocks has taken on. Marcie might be a dumb bitch but at the very least she has a nice and very spankable ass. She gave it a few gentle pats, enjoying the soft, squishy texture and the reaction she got even from this small touch.

“I’m not stopping until this review is over”, Gina sadistically said, drumming her fingers on Marcie’s behind “Would you like to continue reading, ?”

“...yes.”

SPANK!

“Yes, what?”

“Y-yes, Queen Gina! Please allow this useless spanking to keep reading. And please punish this harshly as it is for her own good.”

Marcie wiggled her butt enticingly and took great pains to remain in the perfect position. She got promptly rewarded with another hard slap for her troubles. But this was still preferable to the hot sauce/itching powder punishment that Gina had lined up for the slightest transgression.

Gina cackled pleasantly. “We are currently at chapter...oh my 16 of 50 eh? Guess we will be here for a loooong while. Better not plan on sitting anytime soon.”

Marcie had but to read the story to Gina, knowing full well that even the slightest mistake would have dire consequences for her already burning bottom.

.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈*¨¨*:·. INTERMISSION OVER.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈*¨¨*:·.

“Oh look, Marcie. More whipping!”

“Grrr…”

“Such a shame that the author didn’t do that earlier, eh?”

“This time we meet Dawn again who is a on Captain Hook’s pirate ship. She is also a catgirl, for all the good it does her.”

“No silly costume this time?”

“No, I only care for catboys.”

“We get some really nasty descriptions of whippings. The fuck is her deal with whips anyway? I prefer spankings.”

“Ouch! Will you stop it already?”

“Nah! But it’s only one chapter anyways. Next is. Oh fuck, oh no...”

“We have arrived at the dreaded tournament arc.”

“Only dipshits write tournament stories,”

"You're a femboy. You can't a hero if you have a small penis."

“Excuse me? Has this author ever looked upon a greek statue? Back then small penises was the beauty standard! Having a large penis was frowned upon!”

“For the record I don’t give a shit if dicks are small or huge. I hate them all.”

"Two words!" Chiron barked, raising two fingers for me to see, "You guys ain't heroes!"

Glaze sighed, her head hanging.

"Come on!" I pleaded stubbornly.

"Yeah, that's four words!" Tank said.

"That's not my point!" I said.

“I am pretty sure I made that criticism many times in the past but...this type of comedy just does not work in written form.”

“Meh.”

“And it is five words. Contractions are counted as two...ouch!”

“Keep reading, .”

“So, after a lot of nonsense, Felix made it into the preliminaries.”

"That is Alecto, one of the Furies. They're harpies that are supposed to punish evil do-ers but one day they decided they just hated men. They pretty much do only two things, rant about the 'patriarchy' and how society supposedly advantages men, and whip little boys to for 'justice' and 'equality'. She probably entered this tournament so she could kill boys legally," Chiron said.

So basically, Alecto was your typical feminist. I've actually had teachers like that in my previous life. I know how painful a whipping can be. To kill children this way...

“Fucking hell, here she goes again. Doesn’t she get bored ranting about the same schlock every time?”

“I mean, you are not getting bored about ranting about dicks either...OUCH!”

"I smell another man. Do you pretend to be a lesbian to women?" Alecto asked.

"What?" I asked, dumbfounded by her baseless assumption.

"You were looking forward to me afterwards, weren't you?!"

"I really wasn't."

Alecto stuck her fingers in her ears, " La la la la la, you want to me!" She put her fingers out her ears and cracked her whip at me, "You're just another toxic little boy! I'm going to whip you to !"

“This is almost funny.”

“Is it, Marcie? Is it really?”

“This strawman is so over the top that it is kinda funny. The problem here is that this is not what the author is aiming for. She seems to think there is genuinely no limit to how absurd you can portray someone before it ricochets back on you, the creator, again. Hence, almost funny. It doesn’t help that Alecto gets brutally maimed, whipped and dismembered right after. In that order.”

“And that’s chapter twenty done! Holy fuck! I know spanking you is kinda fun, but this shit is an ordeal! What happens next, ?”

“The original dog from hell attacks.”

“Sure, why not.”

"I got two words of advice for you," Chiron looked straight in my face and smiled. He then pointed towards the arena, "Attack!"

"That's one word!" Tank said.

“Repeat after me: You do not explain the joke. Just delete that last...”

SMACK!

“Complain about something else, .”

“S-So, Felix is playing catch with Cerberus which is cute but...you know, Felix is a catboy who is fighting a dog. The joke is staring her in the face and yet she is still incapable of using it.”

“Better.”

“With this taking care of, Felix and company leave.”

“Meaning, this entire tournament episode was utterly pointless. Actually, there wasn’t even a fucking tournament! We even skipped over a bunch of extra characters because good fucking luck remembering them in this story!”

“Don’t worry, Gina. I hardly doubt any of them end up mattering beyond cool and edgy and girl to screw.”

“We are back to Dawn and you know what that means! MORE WHIPPING PORN!”

“I can’t believe it has only been 25 chapters. They aren’t that long either, but good Lord do they feel like an eternity.”

“So, not Donald suggests to go visit the queen because the randomly going to planets strategy is clearly not working out. Felix, upon hearing, this goes absolutely apeshit and starts trashing the controls of the spaceship causing it to crash on Tarzan planet.”

“Our hero, everyone.”

“You know what’s the worst part about this? We know that D and D aren’t down there. We know this is yet another worthless diversion that will amount to fuck all!”

Duncan and Dawn were my friends! Glaze and Tank didn't even want to look for them at all! Glaze and Tank only wanted to bring me to Queen Ortensia, and I need to find Duncan and Dawn! And if they weren't gonna help... I wasn't looking for Glaze and Tank, no, I was looking for my real friends.

“Is this fucker serious?”

“To recap what just had happened. Felix got the ship crash landed and probably killed both Glaze and Tank in the process. Not to mention the rest of the crew which Felix doesn’t even spare a single thought on. Is the author trying to make the protagonist as unlikable as possible?”

“Tell me about it. I mean even Marcie has ONE good side. *pats butt*”

“Why thank you Gi...hey!”

“Hehehehe.”

“We meet Tarzan. Some nonsense happens. Felix meets back up with his friends. There is drama, all very basic and very boring stuff. The one paragraph I want all of you to keep in mind is this one.”

“We know she was raised in this jungle by the Mangani, when she was presumably abandoned here as a small child,” Jane contemplated, “Her motor skills and posture make me think she was raised by the Mangani since at least toddlerhood, if not infancy. Tarzan’s demeanour when we first encountered her was quite like the accounts written of Victor of Aveyron, another feral child from some centuries before. Those Mangani may be the only family Tarzan has ever had.”

“Yeah, yeah let me just skip to when Felix commits genocide.”

Fifteen feet away from where we standing, was a group of Mangani. They must be retaliating for Clayton shooting one of them. I got into a fighting stance. Glaze, Tarzan and Tank did the same. Within moments, all four of us charged headlong into battle.

Tarzan swung and stabbed the spear into the bodies of the Mangani.

"Tarzan, you're awesome!" I exclaimed as soon as the last Mangani was disposed of.

“Genocide is typically frowned upon and yet Felix disagrees. And no we didn’t remove any scenes that would make this slightly less atrocious. This is the entire fight.”

One of the branches moved beneath Jane and opened up, showing a pair of vines and rapidly whipped Jane's back.

“We have more important stuff to deal with anyways. Like whipping someone.”

"I-" her words were interpret day a gasp

“What? I mean...what? HOW! It shouldn’t even be humanly possible to screw a sentence up that hard!”

“More anime bullshit happens that we will skip because guess what? Nothing that happens on Tarzan planet matters fuck all. Felix and not Donald make up again and everyone fucks off!”

“Meanwhile at the legion of doom.”

They glared maliciously at the hologram before them, showing Felix and the Onis' progress.

“Progress? What progress! They achieved fuck all for 33 chapters!”

“No hyperbole from Gina. We are now back at the planet where they started out from. The group genuinely gained nothing from these three planets they visited. No intel, no new items, no character development. It is almost impressive how pointless it all was.”

“But now Felix gets to learn magic from some hobo wizard. He couldn’t have learned that on his travels or something because that would have made them actually not pointless. Anyways, we are getting a spanking scene for a change.”

“Haa...even pointing them out has become boring.”

I found Duncan. Finally! Now I just needed to find Dawn.

“No, he found you. On the same fucking planet you started your fucking adventure. You did fuck all.”

Duncan and Felix are fighting...then they are fighting a giant robot...can you give me a spanking, Gina?”

SMACK!”

“Thanks. Pain is preferable to the utter boredom this invokes in me.”

“Happy to help.”

My brother had become a literal anime protagonist.

“No, he hasn’t. That is not how you use the word literally, you stupid twat.”

“Uh, Marcie is getting pissed.”

“Even I can only tolerate that much, Gina.”

“Hang in there. Chapter forty. Only ten more to go.”

“We land in Aladdin world, come across Jasmine. Then Felix rapes her.”

“There’s no reason given why Felix rapes the princess. He just does and nobody cares.”

I plucked one of the jewels out from the top of the tree and fell to the floor. Fortunately, a cat always land on its feet.

“This is the first time in this whole fucking story that Felix being a cat actually mattered.

“More whipping”

“Five more chapters to go…”

The single-tail lead-tipped lash has already drawn a crisscross pattern of lines across the princess’ bare shoulders and arms that oozed droplets of blood. Her wrists were rubbed raw by the thin leather cords binding them firmly to the pillars outside the palace, forcing her to stand up while enduring this , while Nasira slashed her back into a grilled mass of flesh. The whip into her flesh as Nasira cracked the whip against her back. Demon onlookers, who numbered in the thousands and line both sides of the street showered her with taunts and insults and spat in her face, yet she was unable to wipe the spittle away due to her hands being restrained. The whip ripped at her dress, exposing the bare flesh of her legs. Meanwhile some male and female demons in the crowd were clearly sexually stimulated by her bare breasts that glistened with sweat and bobbed seductively as she writhed in pain, and were masturbating.

“You know what, Gina? The whipping scenes are not...awfully written. I give the author that. I could see people who are into this getting off on it.”

“And now Marcie is broken. Good job, author!”

“The issue is that they occur so frequently that this is really a story about whipping people first and a Kingdom Hearts retelling second.”

“I just don’t get why this fucker just isn’t fucking committing already! We get it, you fucking like whipping! Just write a story about whipping instead of this bullshit bait and switch every single fucking time!”

“Villain gets defeated, villain gets whipped. Duncan shows up. Another pointless fight between the catboys. Not even imagining them in cute costumes works anymore.”

"Genie, I wish to have sex with you," I said.

“Literally our protagonist.”

“Figuratively...ouch!”

"Aladdin, I'm searching for someone I love too but if I close myself too from other people I'll go crazy," I said.

“Yeah, that’s a great excuse to someone, buddy.”

“...are we done?

“We are! Holy shit! This was ! Not even spanking Marcie made it any more bearable!”

“Well, I’m glad we...ouuuuuuch!”

“But wedgie her sure did!”

“Grrrr...what can we even say about this? This is an anti story. At least stuff like Dark Lord was funny, in an ironic sort of way. At least her writings on Hard Candy made me feel anger. This made me feel nothing. Nothing except the dull agony of boredom. I genuinely hope she submits this to masochist mode so others can share in our suffering. No, I NEED someone else to suffer through his. Only their pain can bring me solace.”

“Yeah this was pretty ass, but look at the bright side, Marcie.”

“What bright side, Gina?”

“Your butt!”