The Pirate and The Wish, Part 1: Back to the Monastery

Shaemus Smythe

Shaemus is worried about his wife. Even after being in this new world for a bit over a month, she still bristles at how life seems to work here. The monks at the monastery try their best to help them adapt, but they can only do so much. She has to be willing to adjust her expectations.

Tonight is a full moon festival at the monastery. Shaemus came out of their shared suite to help, if he can. The place is much fuller than last time. Apparently, the goddess decided today was a good day to dump a bunch of refugees on the monks here. A bunch of drow (all nude, mostly female) and hoppalongs and several other species Shaemus has seen in the monastery before. The handful of 6 breasted tiger-girls with glowing fur are new (and, honestly, appreciated; he’ll admit his tastes in eye-candy have expanded since they arrived) but not too far off of Shaemus’s expectations. Still, everyone is working; Shaemus is lugging tables and chairs out of storage so everyone has a place to sit and eat. There is one drow among the refugees in particular that is giving him some side eye.

“I was told there were no humans here,” she hisses as they pass each other in the storage room.

“Then you’ve been told correctly, more or less. Just me, my wife, and a random girl that had a barcode tattoo, all refugees from other worlds. You do know what a barcode is, right?” Shaemus hasn’t exactly gone shopping in this world, so he doesn’t know if they have barcodes here.

He doesn’t get an answer to his barcode question, as the drow just replies with, “Oh, you are supervised then. Very well.”

Supervised? Weird descriptor. He gets back to moving furniture. The drow still watches him warily, but doesn’t address him again while the job is still needing to be done. By the time lunch approaches, the High Matron (dressed only in a translucent robe) seems satisfied with the seating and gathers the workers all together. Most of them get assigned jobs that have to do with the festival: cooking and cleaning dishes and the like. Shaemus and the still angry looking drow do not. Instead, they get pulled aside.

“I appreciate your help this morning, but I have a particular task for you two of a different nature. The goddess informed me that there is one more refugee to expect this day. She is from your world and has been dropped off up by the dragon’s cave.”

From our world? So, Ms. Angry No-pants here is from our world? That doesn’t make any sense...

The drow interrupts, “A dragon’s cave? I am sure that both the supervised male here and I are ill-equipped to deal with a dragon.”

“Megaballista is a friendly chap and will take care of her well until she is dropped off. Much better than the previous dragon tenant in the volcano up there.”

“Hey,” Shaemus interjects, “Glitterdust wasn’t that bad.”

“If you two will please stop interrupting, I can finish. I am tasking you three (your wife included, Shaemus) to make sure she is supervised until the escort from Nimlith Grove is here. Perhaps you can help her adjust to her new surroundings. And you and your wife are expected to attend tonight’s festivities, Shaemus. With that, dismissed.”

The two of them walk away together, each annoyed at the other. Shaemus at least tries to be polite, “Want lunch with my wife?”

“I suppose. She needs instructions on how to supervise you properly.”

Skye

Tonight is the first full moon since they arrived at their new home and Skye could not be more excited. To think, she will get to worship The Lady at a place truly dedicated to her with some of her new family and her old community. She hopes Harper will be able to peel herself away from court long enough to teleport to the festival; her lady love did promise. She is a little sad that Lady Aelene chose to travel to Teleptafelya with the orcs to check on the town recovering from the aftermath of her date, but she accepts the duty her future wife took upon herself. Daphne and Josie chose not to travel to either destination; the former to work on a swimming pool for the family (Harper has been a little grumpy that her choice is either a too small soaking tank in her old room or a hike down to the ocean to rest her lungs) and the later to start work on a gymnasium business. Still, Scarlet and Nyadia and even Tina are all welcome. If only I could teach Tina how to sing.

Nyadia is quiet. She is still adjusting to life with all of us. So, it is a bit of a surprise when she asks, pointing to the mountain in the middle distance, “That the volcano? The one that inspired the safeword?”

“Yup.” Scarlet declares, not even looking up. She’s been distracted all day. Tina tells a (likely exaggerated) tale of knocking out a fire giant with the swing of her mighty magical mallet, which amuses the lazzorkat. Scarlet, able to recall the fight, only shakes her head and chuckles.

Tina finishes her tale (which somehow involves teaching Glitterdust how to do a barrel roll), only to ask Scarlet, “You okay, cutie?”

“Yeah, it’s just that today is a big day. I’m a little nervous.”

“Oh, yeah. Today’s the day I get your parents to adopt me.”

The other two women laugh at that and Tina’s ears droop. “My parents will treat you like a daughter, but they aren’t going to adopt you. It would be so weird to have sex with my sister.”

Tina mumbles, “It works for Harper and Aelene.”

The caravan driver shouts, “Honored ladies, we should be arriving at the monastery by around lunchtime.”

Oh, good. More time to spend with Mother before the festival.

Kimiko Kimura

Even after months of instruction from The Lady, old habits die hard. The idea that The Lady supports males as well as women still feels wrong. She can’t help but glare at this supervised male as he talks to his “wife” as if he is not her subordinate. It grates on her nerves.

The wife also looks exasperated. “Look, Shaemus, the monks said that our lunch is in one of the reception rooms in the common area. Would you please just go pick up my lunch for me? I really don’t want to deal with the craziness today.”

“No can do, Sinead. The Matron wants us to take care of someone and we are going to do it.”

“You speak too rudely to your supervisor, male,” Kimiko spits.

The male remembers her. “Oh, where are my manners. This is my wife, Sinead.”

“Kimiko Kimura. Your male is poorly trained.”

This Sinead laughs as if that was some joke. “Men. What can you do with them? Your name sounds very Japanese.”

“My parents were very traditional in that sense.”

The both blink, as if what she said was strange. The male speaks first, “But... you’re a drow.”

“Only for the last few months. My daughter came to our home with a gift from The Lady. Despite the blasphemous shape it took, it changed everyone who wished into a drow.”

They both blink. Sinead speaks first this time, stammering, “Our daughter came home with a big magic rifle and it cured me of my cancer. Negotiated with some cosmic power to grant us refuge here.”

Kimiko feels her breath catch as she processes that bit of information. “Your daughter is bound to a blue-skinned woman with quite the well-honed neck slashing strike?” The drow woman rubs her neck, her scar faintly aching.

“Don’t know about the last bit, but Harper is fun. She paid a dowry for my little pumpkin with most of a bottle of scotch.”

Kimiko glares at the male. Sinead sighs, “Let’s go find our lunch, husband. Maybe some wine will help smooth things over with our fellow future parent-in-law.”

The three of them leave the little apartment and head to the reception rooms. When they get to the entrance hall, the space outside the open doors is bedlam. A caravan from up north just arrived. They seem to be preparing to stop for the day. Workers scurry about, chocking wheels and leading horses for fodder and water. A mere four of the travelers head directly to the monastery proper, and Kimiko recognizes two of them.

Only the lazzorkat among the foursome doesn’t make a move. Skye charges and wraps Kimiko in a big hug. The elder drow barely pays attention to anything else, seeing her daughter for the first time in so long. The matron rushes to hug Sinead, nearly tackling the woman. The hoppalong bounds directly in front of the male, asking, “I didn’t get a chance to ask last time, so sorry if this is weird, but would you and Mrs. Smythe like to be my parents? At least, in a way that doesn’t weird Scarlet out? I never had a Dad before.”

Both humans look a little stunned. The male recovers first, “I think we already said that any smoochie friend of my Pumpkin is family. That offer still stands.”

“Where’s Harper and Wolfy?” Sinead gasps, the air being squeezed out of her.

The hoppalong answers, “Harper is in court, doing princess things. Josie is being all girl boss back home. We’re good, but she wanted to get some stuff done for her gym. It’s gonna be so cool when she’s set up!”

“You all getting along?”

The hoppalong nods and murmurs assent.

Skye blushes a little as she breaks her hug, “Oh, sorry Mother, but that is Tina and back there is Ms. Nyadia. You remember Scarlet, right?”

Scarlet lets go of Sinead; her cheeks briefly catches fire. “And there is Skye, Mom and Dad. You three doing okay?” Scarlet then squeezes the male in a big hug.

The male wheezes, “I’m doing fine, Pumpkin, breathing is for the weak, right?”

The lazzorkat finally walks up, offering a paw out, “A pleasure to meet you.”

Kimiko takes it. “May The Lady of the Dance bless you.”

“She has, in Her mischievous way.”

Scarlet releases the male, who gasps out, “Well, how about some lunch? Maybe you all can help with a little project we have afterwards.”

Scarlet

Once everyone settled down, lunch was good. Dad whined about how Nyadia didn’t have to eat any veggies, but took the initiative to make the lazzorkat feel welcome. Tina tried to impress Mom with some magic. Mom acts like she did when I was a kid showing off a dance step I was almost (but not quite) proficient in. Kimiko grilled Skye about Aelene. Scarlet was glad that Harper warned her wife about Josie’s big mouth before they left for the monastery; Skye showed some courage that she couldn’t before the show defending her other love.

And Scarlet was waiting for her wish to show up. The anticipation is distracting, but she tries her best to engage with everyone.

After lunch, Tina goes to wander off and get some Insta-Thot videos filmed. She still has to get three a day in, but, since she has an introduction for WLA scheduled as her third during the festival, she only needs to find inspiration for two of them. Annabelle the former table offers to help, which Tina gladly takes. Skye and her mom go off to check on their community, at least until this “special project” arrives; they will be traveling to Nimlith Grove to get acquainted with the capital before heading off to the land Harper has arranged to let them settle. Nyadia is content to laze in a sunbeam as if she’s a housecat instead of a tiger while she waits. Which leaves Scarlet with her parents to wile the time away with more catching up.

“You eating enough, Pumpkin?”

“Yeah, Dad.”

The three stare, a shared silence. Mom breaks it, “Wanna tell us why you’re so nervous?”

Scarlet lets out a scoffing laugh, “Is it that obvious?”

“Yes, it is, Pumpkin. Our pervy goddess going to make you dance for everyone again?”

That makes Scarlet pause, despite the flames rising from her cheeks. “Our goddess?”

“My husband has got the foolish notion that he should offer some devotion to the one who brought us here. Something about supporting his daughter?”

Scarlet does not like the mischievous glint in Dad’s eyes as he adds, “And it totally unlocks new ways of teasing my little pumpkin.”

“Like you need more ways to tease me, Dad.”

“Oh, I do, I do. If I don’t have enough variety of targets, you’ll grow immune. As the goddess would say, ‘Teasing is my love language.’”

Scarlet sighs, then decides to change the subject. “So, Harper should be here tonight. She’s likely to teleport home before we set off tomorrow morning, life of being the heir keeps her busy. You two ready to leave tomorrow?”

“She have more of that scotch?”

“I think she snagged a case for you, but I am not sure.”

“Husband, don’t be so irritating. We are ready, though I am not sure if I will ever get used to this world.”

“It’s an adjustment for us, too.”

Dad nods his head towards Nyadia, sardonically noting, “The cat looks comfy.”

“Nyadia is from here. Across the ocean, but here. And she is having to adjust to aspects of our new life too.”

A few things happen simultaneously. One, Nyadia arches her back as she stretches, which has the effect of causing her breasts to stick into the air. This attracts both Scarlet and her Dad’s eyes towards the lazzorkat. And a very familiar voice declares to no one in particular, “That cat lady has 6 boobies.”

Scarlet freezes. Even knowing that the wish was to come true, she never expected to hear that voice again. When the challenge was over and she was told that she won, there was only one thing she wanted. Her alive and well and in her arms again. It was a selfish wish, one she tried her best not to make. But Ms. E was so insistent on Scarlet wishing for something purely for herself and Honey did such a great job parsing out the wish language that Scarlet gave in. And now? Now she had to explain it.

Mom reacts first, “ALEX?!?!?!?”