The Naughty List

Amber North was the neighborhood MILF.

She loved being the neighborhood MILF. She went on a walk every evening in very tight shorts or pants depending on the weather and tight tops, and she loved how men looked at her.

She was 44, divorced, with two kids in college, one a freshman girl, and the other a junior boy. She was divorced because she cheated on her husband with the husband of her ex-best friend. She worked as a real-estate agent, and picked up leads and listings by lying sabotage, but was good at it as she was never caught.

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Back at Santa's workshop, some naughty, perverted elves played with Santa's magic. They could use it to find anyone in the world and see if they were naughty or nice. Santa used it for children, but the elves used it to find naughty women who needed to be given something much better than a lump of coal, and they found Amber.

"Time to give this naughty minx a Christmas she won't soon forget," said one of the elves.