The Mermaid and The Carpenter

Eric wandered in with a heavy sigh, dropping his gym bag at the door. His day wasn't exactly spectacular but at least he was able to burn off his frustration at the gym. Even better was the nice long soak in their jacuzzi followed by an equally hot shower.

"Ooooh Eric." Lauren called from his room.

Eric sighed, he knew she was just up to something again. "Whaaaat?" He called back as he looked over the junk mail and bills for any past dues.

"You might want to turn around." Lauren was in the living room with him now. He rolled his eyes and turned to see his little sister standing at the hallway.

"What?" Taking the cue she walked gracefully into the living room. Her red dress lightly grazing the floor with each purposeful step she took in her heels. Each step brought her closer to Eric, and each step displayed more of her beautiful legs. Her hair had been pinned up showing off the curves of her neck. The faintest dusting of glitter on her lipstick made her lips sparkle like a ruby in firelight. The smokey eyeshadow shimmered as it caught the light like a warm night's sky. "Um...hi." Eric mentally kicked himself for sounding so stupid.

"I guess I really did surprise you then huh?" Lauren laughed proudly.

"What?"

"You two have a date tonight."

"Lauren!" Eric groaned. "I...I have a girlfriend." Eric would rather tear his own foot off than turn down a date with a beautiful woman like her but his friend needed him.

Lauren suddenly guffawed loudly. "This is your girlfriend, idiot!"

Eric was blown away into stunned silence as the feminine figure approached him. "Hi," Jodie spoke for the first time since his entrance. His soft voice purred seductively. Eric was still too stunned to speak so she softly kissed his cheek. "You deserve a nice night out after all you've done for me." Jodie's eyes begged Eric to let him do this for his friend like a lost puppy begs for food.

Eric had **** but to agree. "I have your clothes all picked out for the night laid out on your bed." Lauren gently broke through Eric and Jodie's deep soulful stare.

“Right…” Eric ran a hand nervously through his hair. “I guess...I’ll be right back.” he swallowed hard and hurried to his room. Before dressing he took a quick detour to his bathroom and splashed cold water on his face. ‘How did Jordan look so amazing? I thought he was a real girl? God, I need to get a girlfriend…a real girlfriend, and soon before I do something stupid.’ Eric looked to his jeans and the erection trying to break free. “Sorry, little buddy. No time.” Eric splashed cold water on his face one more time before readying for his “date”. He brushed his teeth, combed his hair, shaved the little shadow of a beard he may have let slip for work this morning, and quickly changed into the nice suit left out on his bed. Eric placed a hand on the door, pausing before opening to remind himself that it was his best friend on the other side of the door and not the stunningly beautiful woman he appeared.

Eric opened the door and was immediately struck by Jodie’s beautiful smile. “Okay, you two,” Lauren cheered, “I’ve taken care of all the arrangements, you two just go and have fun.”

“Go?” Eric was barely listening, “Go where?”

“Jordan knows.” Lauren smirked.

Later, the couple were almost to the restaurant before one finally spoke. “How exactly did you let my sister rope you into this?”

Jodie shrugged, “She made some good points. And besides, like, you need help.”

“Help with what?”

“There’s so much more than just hand holding, tonight...just consider me practice.”

“I don’t know man, that seems kinda weird doesn’t it?”

“I know!” Jodie tried to hide the hurt in his voice. “But, you’ve done so much for me and put up with so much because of me, and now this…” he looked to Eric like a kicked puppy, “I want to give you something back, more than just rent money. So, please, just for dinner...no matter how weird it may seem, just...treat me like I’m your date, Jodie.”

Eric stopped the car at the valet and locked eyes with the beauty beside him, “Okay, Jodie.”

Eric stepped out of the car and stopped the Valet before he could open the passenger door so that he could instead. Jodie placed her hand lightly in Eric’s as he helped her from the car. With practiced grace she stepped out into the cold night air. The other patrons watched the couple walking into the restaurant, their faces awash with jealousy and envy. Her earrings twinkled in the warm lights each time they would catch the light.

Eric felt like he was escorting a movie star, at her service for anything she desired. Frankly, the way he felt the moment Jodie slowly sat in the chair he held for her, he would give her his car if she asked. It was getting harder and harder to remind himself this was his best friend pretending to be a beautiful woman.

Jodie would never admit it out loud but he had always dreamed of seeing such adoration when he went anywhere, of course this was not how he planned.

“Madame. Masseur.” The host addressed them both, “If we may, we have prepared a wonderful delicacy for you this evening that is sure to delight. Beginning of course with a bottle of our finest wine, Castillo Ygay.” The host snapped his fingers and another man came to the table carrying an open bottle of wine chilling in a bucket of ice which he promptly poured carefully into the wine glasses another waiter brought to their table. The two men immediately hurried back into the shadows where they originated. The host soon followed, leaving promises of food to come any second.

“Wow.” Eric finally said taking in the surroundings for the first time. There were few lights on the walls or ceiling but the room itself was lit warmly with soft candles on each table with a couple of its own. There was no mistake this was not any regular food joint, but rather a restaurant meant for lovers. Eric swallowed hard at the final thought, “And you didn’t know anything about this?”

“Only, like, a couple hours before you did.” Jodie shrugged. “It takes time to look this good.”

It was strange to Eric for his, male best friend, to say he looked good in a dress that just begged for sex. “You think you look good?”

“You don’t?”

Eric immediately broke at Jodie’s hurt expression, “No, I mean. Yes. You look...I don’t know.”

“You can say it.”

“I...I’m not gay but...you look sexy as hell.”

“What’s gay about finding a beautiful woman attractive?” Jodie teased.

“You know what I mean.”

“I know, but remember, tonight I am not Jordan. I am Jodie, your long time girlfriend and we’re out celebrating our anniversary.”

“We are?!”

Jodie giggled before biting her lip, “Yeah. I may have had to make up a lie about what I was doing tonight to some guy. Guess it turned out to be true.”

“I mean, it is kinda true. It was about three years ago you moved in with me.”

A faint smile crept across Jodie’s face as she took another large sip of wine. “Hard to believe you put up with me for that long.”

Eric placed a hand on Jodie’s, “Hey, I love having you live with me. With you around, at least I can say my life will never be dull.” Jodie blushed a deep red. Eric suddenly pulled his hand away and nervously took a large drink of wine. Not being wine drinkers they were unaccustomed to the creeping effects it can have upon unsuspecting drinkers. While liquor and beer is upfront in its potency, wine is subtle and slow, and is best taken in slow sips over long hours. But, most of all, it is unwise to mix any wine with medicinal tranquilizers. Especially three.

“Okay, so like, you need to practice more.” Jodie said suddenly after the appetizers were taken away.

“Practice what?”

“Pitching woo. Come on, give me your best shot.”

“I don’t know.”

“Hey, we’re already on a date, might as well get some use out of it.” Jodie giggled enjoying the amazing feeling. His brain was usually a whirlwind of fears and worries, but all of that seemed to be lost somewhere. All that filled his mind was repaying his sweet friend. “Just act like you’re on a real date with a girl you like.”

“Okay.” Eric polished off a glass in a single swallow to prepare himself. To begin, Eric once again took Jodie’s hand, running his thumb over the back of her hand.

“Softer.” She whispered. Eric nodded and began to lightly trace his thumb. “That’s good.” Jodie sighed as the warmth spread over her body. “Keep going.” Eric thought for a moment before picking up Jodie’s hand and kissed it gently.

“Jodie, maybe we should-” Eric began to say something but was cut off by the start of a live band begging to play.

Jodie watched the musicians with longing in her eyes as the dance floor began to fill. Eric, continued holding his date’s hand as he stood. “What are you doing?”

“Dancing with my girlfriend.”

“You know, I stink at dancing.”

“You said act like you’re my real girl. So, trust me and come dance.” Jodie swallowed another glass of wine before allowing himself to be led to the dance floor.

On the dance floor the people swayed along to the gentle melodies. Jodie looked up at her date, “Now what?” Eric smiled and laced his fingers into one hand, with the other he held the small of her back and pulled her in close. Jodie swallowed hard, it was certainly not the first time she had been pulled into a handsome man but it felt different. Before her heartbeat rapidly wanting nothing more than to flee. Now, Jodie’s heart skipped a beat as Eric led her around the dance floor. Why it did, she couldn’t tell you. “You know,” Jodie whispered as she carefully glided along, “for someone who’s not so good at PDA you’re an amazing dancer.”

“Not really. But...remember in high school when I said I was going to football camp?”

“Yeah?”

“That was kind of a fib. Dancing is supposed to help with football. Something about reflexes.”

“Did it?” Eric shrugged, “I can’t believe you lied to me.” Jodie smiled.

“I didn’t want you to make fun of me.”

“Oh, I totally would have back then. But now…”

“Now?”

Jodie’s face burned from too much wine, no doubt. Jodie bit her lip trying to **** clarity through the fog. “We-we should eat.”