The Dangers of Hope

“-it was that strange. I mean, Lerianna’s still going through a lot of changes right now with adjusting to that limiter of hers. Go easy on her. Besides, she seemed fine when I asked her to talk with Aclysia while we were gone.”

“I will do as you ask, Father.”

The muffled voices became clearer to those outside as John opened the door to the hastily erected shed that had been constructed while they were gone. He took a quick glance at it while letting Sophia, Shishun, and Maera follow him through.

It was a bit fancier than he’d expected, erected with well-structured stone and mortar and a sturdy set of steps that led up to the slightly elevated entrance. It was octagonal and large enough to nearly qualify as a tiny home by modern standards, quite a few feet wider in each direction than the cordoned off area they’d had set up for him previously. It looked like what John imagined an actual groundskeeper’s cottage might have looked from a few centuries back if they were lucky enough to work for a particularly wealthy noble, though he wasn’t sure if that idea was accurate or a product of too many fantasy movies.

The sound of an argument appearing seemingly from thin air did disturb the workers in the Brighton’s front yard and garner a few strange stares from the groundskeepers, but far less than before, and with far less fright in their eyes than when they’d watched an entire group appear out of thin air. John noted it as a small victory, and put a smile on his face as they headed for the gates of the manor.

“Aww, are we not gonna at least say hi to the nice lady? Maera was only gonna play with her for a little bit,” Maera whined as they strolled away, casting a longing glance over her shoulder at the large building.

“I already texted Moira this morning to check if she wanted to visit Kim with us, but she said they’re busy. Between finalizing their preparations to move most of the Order and checking on the progress of the mercenaries, Moira has her hands full,” John explained. “And I’m not going to spend time going to the manor just so you can get chased around the yard by a bunch of recruits.”

“Aww, fine. But Myaera’s gonna take this out on you later,” Maera huffed. John quirked an eyebrow, not entirely sure what she meant, but far more amused than frightened by the undoubtedly adorable **** she had in mind.

Normally, John would have just let Maera go visit Glenna and taken someone else along for the visit to Kim’s Manor, but Mithra was watching the kittens, Orria was still keeping an eye on Vallya for him, and Lerianna was having a conversation with Aclysia to help her figure things out about her feelings. Lerianna had seemed agreeable to the idea, though neither of them was sure whether to structure it more like a class lesson or a therapy session. Teaching emotions to what had once been a literal statue was new ground for everyone.

“...Though, what if Sophia is right? Lerianna was acting a bit off this morning. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked her to start their sessions while she’s still adjusting to her limiter…” John shook his head after a moment, chasing away the doubt. “No, no, even if it wasn’t working, she’d just be a little… rowdier than usual. And maybe a bit more aggressive, but that’s only ever been pointed at me. She should be fine. Besides, I didn’t Salvage all of the loot we’ve been getting so it can just keep sitting around.”

Thankfully, with Maera by his side constantly chattering away as they journeyed, the trip to Kim’s was relatively quick. Even at what they considered a “walk” now, the speed that John could traverse the city on foot had improved tremendously over the past few days of training. That gave John little time to dwell on odd behaviors before they were standing on the sidewalk outside the Moon Clan’s home. He didn’t even bother pulling his phone out of his inventory – it took mere seconds for Kim to arrive and begin ushering them inside the clan’s home and into the Barrier that enveloped it.

“Hurry, we must move quickly to the training area,” Kim said, voice almost a whisper. She furrowed her brows as she spoke, and her eyes darted around as if expecting an attack. “Hurry, come with me.”

“Is something wrong?” John asked, more surprised than concerned. Kim was not the type to beat around the bush if there was real danger, though her behavior still alarmed him.

“When I mentioned to my father that you would be arriving to train today, he took a sudden and… unexpected interest in you. I believe he intends to-”

“A most timely entrance, John Newman.”

The deep voice of an older man struck Kim like a bolt of lightning, her body visibly going rigid as she caught herself mid-stride. In the silence that followed, the sound of rhythmic tapping filled the air as an older man approached. He descended the stairs from one of the larger buildings on the clan’s estate, his steps easy and measured, his eyes firmly locked on John the entire time.

“My daughter has told me much about you,” the older man said when he drew near, offering a low bow. He wore an outfit of similar themes and colors to Kim’s Slayer attire, with his long hair in a topknot that still showed the first signs of gray among its strands. “I have heard of many great things you have done, despite your recent entrance into the Abyss, but we have not yet had a chance to speak of these matters directly. My name is Kwang Moon. Come and join me for a drink, please.”

The request was not spoken as a question – Kim’s father turned back toward the building as quickly as he’d arrived, rather than awaiting a response. Kim relaxed only slightly as he turned his back on her, sighing lightly as she directed her gaze toward John.

“Come on, then. Let’s make this quick, so that we might-”

“I won’t require your presence for this conversation, Kim. You are free to train in the yard with his… friends. I will only hold him for a few minutes, do not be too concerned.”

Kwang’s tone made it clear that Kim was more “required” than “free” to do so. Kim grimaced as she glanced over her shoulder at John, who did his best to return a somewhat comforting shrug. Sophia bristled slightly at the words, and didn’t calm down until John gave her a knowing look and nodded to affirm the order. Shishun nodded back in tandem with the harpy, while Maera just sat there with her head half-cocked.

“He talks like Lord Brighton,” Maera noted. “Is he a nice man like Lord Brighton too?”

“Just as nice, twice as dangerous,” Kim mused, staring after her father with a puzzled look.

“Any idea what this is about, Kim?” he half-whispered, not sure how good Kwang’s hearing was, or if he was listening to them with a spell.

“Not the slightest… though considering he waited for you to arrive here rather than request your presence, I have my suspicions,” Kim mused, narrowing her eyes.

“Go ahead to the dojo, I’ll invite you to the party, so you should be able to get experience even if I’m not there,” John said, tapping through his Party menu to send her an invite.

“It’s a dojang, not a dojo. I suggest sticking to English while you’re in there…” Kim said, her expression somehow walking the fine line between amused and deadly serious. “I’m not responsible if you come back with any broken bones.”

“Terrifying. Good stuff,” John said, pursing his lips slightly and giving a firm nod as he started toward the building, giving his other companions a final wave. “You four have fun. I’ll try to come back with all my limbs in one piece.”

“Don’t be too scared, his training sessions are nowhere near as intense as mine. You should survive.”

“I think she’s enjoying this.”

John walked up to the same door that Kwang had entered and was somewhat relieved when it swung open at his approach. Kwang stood with his hand on the door, eyes piercing through John as effortlessly as a blade. He gestured inside and took the lead, bringing John down the hallway and into a small room that was either a dining room or a meeting room set aside for this purpose – the only thing inside was a moderately sized table with four chairs, along with a handful of plants lining the walls.

“Welcome to my home, John. I believe this is the first time you’ve been inside this part of our compound?”

“Yes. Sir,” John added after a moment, though he wasn’t entirely sure why. Kwang was powerful, certainly, and an important ally, but why was he so nervous? It wasn’t as if he actually expected Kim’s father to attack him, and he’d hardly even known the man’s name until now. It was the uncertainty that was throwing him off, surely… and he could fix at least some small part of that.

Kwang Moon
Level 185 Slayer
<Head of the Moon Clan>
HP: 32,385 / 32,385
Relationship: -14
Alignment: +72
Status Effects: Slayer’s Mastery

Impressive, as John had expected, though notably weaker than Lord Brighton, even before the former Warden Lord had embraced the Rose during his spar with Adantia. What concerned John more than his level was his relationship – after all he’d done and the ways he had interacted with Kim, he expected to at least be in the positives. Suddenly, being attacked or harassed didn’t seem entirely off the table.

“Please, let us be seated. I would not **** a guest to remain standing even for such a brief meeting.”

“Well, at least he’s calling me a guest… and saying this should be over quickly,” John mused, nodding gratefully at Kwang as he sat in the nearest chair. He was caught off guard when Kwang sat beside him rather than taking the chair across from him, and his nerves returned slightly as the Moon Clan’s leader was suddenly so close that they were nearly brushing elbows.

“I’m sure you have many questions. Allow me to speak, and we shall see if you find any answers,” Kwang began, his eyes locked directly ahead on the wall. John had been half-staring at the man, mostly out of surprise at his choice of seat, but **** himself to match Kwang’s posture, bringing his eyes forward before nodding.

“The events of the last year have caused a great deal of upheaval in Springfield, and much strife has come to all who live here. I am sure you have become quite familiar with it by now, considering that some of that strife was the reason you found yourself journeying to the west coast?”

“It was.” John kept his answer short, unsure of how much had been relayed to Kwang. His interactions with Himiko were not something he made particularly public, and as far as he knew, only the Order knew the extent of her obsession with him – and precious few of them, at that. John wasn’t even sure how freely the two groups shared information as a general rule, much less about him specifically.

“I must admit, I am still somewhat shocked by all that you managed to accomplish. Digging up old graves and bringing ghosts home… what you did was quite the accomplishment, John Newman.”

“Thank you.”

“I did not intend that entirely as a compliment,” Kwang said, voice taking on a coating of steel. “While I can understand your motivations, you must understand by now that every action we take has consequences. Consequences that we rarely understand, if we are even aware of them at all.”

“I’m aware that things could have gone badly, but I couldn’t just leave things as they were. Moira… Moira was in a tough situation. If I didn’t bring Adantia back, she would have had to leave Springfield. I assume your clan would have had to do the same thing. Isn’t it better to have a chance to stay here?”

“It is true that there is now a chance we may keep our home – but you have coaxed the Order to war in order to facilitate that chance, John.”

“I encouraged them to fight for their home,” John admitted, “but it was Moira’s call. I didn’t **** their hand, I just showed them that there was another way. That they didn’t have to flee. I gave them another option.”

“And in doing so, you have given hope to those who were prepared to leave this city.”

“And you apparently think that’s a bad thing?” John blurted out, incredulous.

“...Hope is a dangerous thing. Without hope, humans will go into survival mode. They will do what they must to get by, day by day, no matter how terrible it may seem at the time,” Kwang said, voice low, although his eyes and expression remained unwavering, at least for as long as John dared to peek over. “But hope? People will die for hope, no matter how illusory it truly is.”

“Not much of an optimist, are you?”

“Your jokes have their place… I will assume,” Kwang said dubiously, going so far as to briefly throw John a side-eye. “That place is not in a discussion of matters this serious.”

“Why don’t you stop beating around the bush and tell me why you called me in here? I’ve got a war to prepare for.”

“I am well aware. And that is exactly why I’ve called you here. This hope you have instilled has taken a fierce hold in my daughter. She is now fully prepared to throw her life away for a city and friends she was already prepared to lose… until you arrived home with a woman we had thought long dead.”

“So that’s what this is about?” John’s voice was layered with disbelief. “If you’re worried about her, fight by her side or, I don’t know, ground her. I don’t see how the fact that I gave her hope to get to keep her home is a bad thing. I’ve seen the way she fights – you should be used to her risking her life by now.”

“My daughter is a Slayer,” Kwang said, his voice sharp and cutting once more. “She risks her life in the name of duty and honor, that much is true. And the pride that such duty has afforded her means that if I were to ‘ground’ her, or forbid her from following you, it would only assure her that she is making the right decision. And were I to take all measures needed to keep her here by ****… she would hate me. Perhaps so strongly that I would lose her as surely as if she had died.”

“So, what, you want me to tell her?”

“No, I expect that she would react much the same if it came from you… even if she was not aware that we were having this conversation,” Kwang admitted. A deep sigh escaped the man, the first real emotion he’d let seep through his harsh voice, fatigue and annoyance blossoming into the air. “All that would accomplish at this point is alienating her from the forces that might help to keep her safe.”

“Then… what did you call me here for?”

Kwang turned toward John, only a small turn, but enough for their gazes to meet directly as he spoke. His voice was calm, but his words were heavy, and wielded so precisely John felt the air stir as each passed him by.

“Because I want you to understand my position. Our position. We have something in common, you and I. We have both lost someone important to us, a lover so dear that they took a piece of us with them forever when they departed.” Cold sparked down John’s spine as Kwang spoke, the man’s direct gaze unwavering as he paused only briefly. “...And we both know what will happen to the person we deem responsible, should we suffer that loss again.”

A deep silence filled the room, intermingling with the sudden chill that filled the air. John fought the urge to flick his eyes to his inventory, suppressing his instincts that were screaming out that he was in danger. Whether due to his status as a fully-fledged Slayer or simply the raw intensity of his emotions, Kwang’s very presence radiated a lethal intent.

“I believe we are in agreement on that matter,” John said, forcing his voice to stay level. “You needn’t worry. I would give my life a thousand times before letting another take my place.”

“Only if you were given a choice,” Kwang murmured. “Would that a simple promise or vow were to suffice… if it were so easy, I would make that promise myself. But even with all your efforts and good intentions, even with both of us present on that battlefield, neither of us can say with true certainty that my daughter will survive this war. A war that she is now determined to see through to the end.”

Another beat passed, though thankfully this time the hostility emanating from Kwang seemed to ebb rather than intensify. The hair on the back of John’s neck slowly relaxed, freeing up enough of his mind to think more carefully about his next words.

“As you said yourself, we have something in common. We’ve both lost people, it’s true. And I’m sure losing another might well break what little is left holding either of us together,” John murmured. “And neither of us asked for this war. But one of us is still willing to fight it.”

“And you believe this willingness to fight makes you brave?”

“I think it makes me someone who hasn’t given up,” John emphasized, frustratedly waving one arm. “You blame me for starting a war? For not running away like you wanted to, for not saving my own skin and leaving everyone else to die? I could hide away in my new world where none of this matters, where my family and I would be safe. But what would be the point of that? Even during my year of isolation, I still came back here. Not very often, and usually to hunt someone down, but I did. Because I always intended to return. To help make this world better. If I was just going to bury my head in the sand, if I was willing to let everyone else suffer and die while I lived in safety…”

John swallowed briefly, casting his eyes toward Kwang. He found that the man was already staring at him, Kwang’s expression difficult to read, his lips pursed in a tight line.

“If I’m not willing to fight for the people I care about, if I’m ever so broken that I’d rather save my own skin than fight for a better world for them,” John swore, “I may as well let you kill me right now, like you seem so eager to. Better than living that kind of life.”

Silence reigned for a brief moment… then it broke with an unexpected sound. A choked laugh escaped Kwang’s lips, so brief John barely saw the stern man’s face move.

“I see why you and my daughter have been getting along so famously…”

There was something more in those words, but before John could contemplate them for long, Kwang pushed his chair back and stood.

“I did not ask for this war, but I will fight in it all the same. I will not abandon my daughter, nor my allies in the Order. And make no mistake, I am not eager to kill you, John Newman.”