The Common Goblin

Common Name: Goblin

Small, wiry creature, wrought in the image of man but crude. A foul scuttling thing, they are. They walk on two legs, and dwell in dark, damp areas, caves, sewers, and even a nobleman's cellar, should the occasion arise. Their tribes are led by the largest and most powerful male, titled “Greenpa”, born by a common mutation of the seed.

Warning to the Fair Reader

Should you find yourself beset by a goblin raiding party, we strongly advise you to fight to the death. For if you are taken alive, you shall soon discover that “being bred by goblins” is not a romantic euphemism, but a very literal and extremely sticky fate. And no... before you ask, I cannot suggest the proper precautionary measures to ensure fun, mind-expanding, coitus with these creatures, that is for my academic rival, Gaëlle the Sickly. So, if you feel even the slightest bit of curiosity about the matter, lobotomize yourself now.