The Bad Guy.

You watch and wait while Claire and Holly play Skee-Ball. You join in when they play a game of Laser Tag. Claire wins the game with no strategy at all, she just runs around shooting everyone. She has good aim and she’s cute enough that other people don’t shoot her first. Her smile is huge when she finds out she won, seeing that smile helps lighten the weight you are carrying, but not much. It’s when everyone heads to the food counter that you finally approach Holly, tell her you need to talk. Take her off to the side, slip into an empty party room.

“What is it?” She asks. The way she looks at you. . . damn.

“I,” You almost lose your nerve. “I need you to read this letter.” You say, handing it out to her. She takes it, looks at you strangely.

“Right now, or later?” She asks.

“Now, please.” You answer. She opens it, you can tell she has reservations but she trusts you. That trust feels like an accusation, but only because you know what is about to happen, what you are choosing to do to her.

She opens the letter.

Greetings, dear sister.

My name is Leroy, and I know about the curse that affects your family. Holly, you must read this entire letter.

She looks up at you, panic in her eyes. It kills you, you’ve betrayed her and she knows it. Even still, she cannot stop, her eyes are forced to return to the paper.

You no longer carry the burden of your curse alone, I will carry it with you.

Holly, you must stop worrying about your curse, you must live your life in peace and joy, knowing that you are safe.

Holly, when you finish reading this you will forget about this letter, forget about me, and live a life without fear of your curse.

Your friend,

Leroy.

She finishes reading it and a blank look comes over her face for a split second. You take that chance to grab the letter from her hand, put it back in the envelope and back in your pocket.

“So what did you want to talk about?” Holly asks you.

“I just wanted to see how you are holding up.” You say, pushing down your feelings.

“It’s been tough.” She says. “Claire is getting so big, she’s so smart.” You see tears starting to form in her eyes. “But seeing her with Maisie and you, I know it was the right thing to do.” She says, touching your arm gently. You pull away from her touch, then immediately feel bad as Holly looks hurt.

“I’m sorry Holly.” You say.

“No, I should be the one apologizing, it’s one of the rules after all.”

No touching. It is a rule and for good reason. “Yeah.” Is all you can answer.

“We should get back.” Holly says. You nod, turn and walk back to where everyone is. Maisie looks at you, you nod to her and keep going. You aren’t hungry, but you damn sure could use a drink.

Claire finds you at the bar, drinking your second whiskey and cola. You go with her, play the games she loves. Air hockey which she is terrible at, the giant connect four which she is far from terrible at and then literally every game that involves a spinning wheel. You make a mental note never to let Claire on a casino floor as you head back to the group.

As Claire hugs her grandmother Maisie pulls you aside.

“Babe,” Maisie says, “I invited Holly to come hang out at the hotel.”

“Why would you do that?” You ask.

“She read the letter right?”

“Yes.”

“I think we should talk with her, make sure it worked.” Maisie explains. It’s a bad idea. You and Holly together is a bad idea. You, Holly and Maisie together is a terrible idea. But how do you tell Maisie that?

“Maisie, can’t you cancel it?”

“Did you mean to command me there?”

“No, of course not, Maisie, cancel that command.” You say reflexively.

You didn't mean to command her, but maybe you should. You are in no state to be around Holly.

“Babe, are you okay?” Maisie says grabbing your arms.

“No.” You answer.

“Do you need me to tell Holly not to come?”

You look at Maisie, she needs this. For whatever reason she needs to talk to her sister tonight. You will have to manage.

“No, Maisie, I’ll be fine.” You lie. She doesn’t believe you but she lets it go. She wants Holly to come to the room tonight and that’s what will happen.

“Fuck.” You say under your breath.

You don’t go right away. You stay at the bar with John and Maisie while Holly, Mary and Claire play even more Skee-ball. You drink a bit more, eat a soft pretzel and listen to Maisie and her father talk about hockey. You never got into it yourself, but Maisie knows people in the Devils organization and her dad is a Carolina fan and Maisie likes to rile him up. You listen enough to chime in when your name is called, but you keep looking back to Claire and Holly.

Holly seems different, a little quicker to laugh, a little more affectionate with Claire. Her smile seems more genuine. You hope that is the case, and you aren’t just seeing what you want to see to make you feel better about what you did tonight. At least Holly doesn’t know what you did. The curse made her forget it. If she knew, how would she feel? You remember her face when she looked up from the letter, the panic, the fear, the betrayal. You down your whiskey and signal for another.

“Maisie?” You say.

“Yes, babe?”

“Can you drive tonight?” You are holding it together, but the way she looks at you, she can tell what you are feeling.

“Of course, babe.”

You turn away before a tear can escape your eye. You agreed to this, you believe it is the best path for Holly, but that look Holly gave you. . .

The bartender puts your drink down in front of you. “That’s the last one.” She says. You nod in reply. You must look awful if she’s cutting you off. And that’s okay, you should look awful. You feel awful, and rightly so.

John Petersen laughs at something Maisie said, and you get up. You can’t be here. You can’t sit and act like everything is fine. You need air, you need space.

“Babe, where are you going?” Maisie is on your arm in a flash.

“I don’t know,” You say. “I just need to get out of here.”

“Let me get my coat.”

“No, Maisie, let me go, I need to be alone.” You say, holding it together, tears starting to slip from your eyes.

She looks at you for a second, like an internal debate is raging, then she nods. “Okay. Keep your phone on you.” She says as you feel her pull the keys out of your pocket. “I mean that. Keep it on you.” She is worried but she lets you go, she doesn’t follow.

You walk outside, stare up at the sky, the clouds, the stars, the darkness. It helps. You walk to the outside tables and sit down, stare off into the distance. You see her face, Holly’s face. . . You see her back in Mexico, the way she looked at you then, the way she looked at you when you promised to protect Claire from the curse. The trust in her eyes, the pleading look, hoping she had found someone that would do right by your daughter. Then the face today, confusion, betrayal, fear. Dammit her last non-curse controlled feeling was being afraid of you.

“You okay?”

Fuck. It’s Holly. Fuck. You can’t answer, you just try your best to wipe your eyes.

“Did something happen on your trip?” Holly asks.

You can’t answer, you can’t trust yourself. You should confess what you did, apologize to her, she deserves that. But you sit there.

“Hey.” She says, squatting down in front of you, pushing your chin up. “Are things okay with you and Maisie?”

You nod, it’s the best you can do.

“Okay.” Holly looks past you toward the bar. Your eyes follow and you see Maisie staring out the window at the two of you, she looks so nervous, but she doesn’t come out.

“I get if you don’t want to tell me what is going on.” Holly continues. “But I’m here for you.”

It takes all the strength you have just to keep it together. Holly sitting across from you, keeping just enough distance to satisfy the rules. She cares, she’s sitting there because she knows you are suffering and she wants to help. But only because she doesn’t know, she can’t remember what you just did to her. But you know, and her face in that moment showed you exactly how she felt. This Holly is a lie, a lie you forced on her. For her own fucking good.

You hear footsteps, look up to see Mary Peterson walking your way. “I got it Holly, Claire is looking for you.”

Holly stood up, touched your shoulder gently. “I’ll be inside if you need me, Scott.” She says then walks away, not even realizing what she called you. You watch her walk away, try to tell yourself you did the right thing.

“Maisy says you commanded her not to follow you. She’s stuck inside, she can't come out.” Mary tells you once Holly is back inside. “She’s worried about you, Holly is too.” She says, worry in her voice as well. “What happened, you’ve been nervous all night, and now. . . are you really okay?”

“I just need a minute.” You reply, you hope it is true. “I’ll text Maisie, tell her to come out.”

“Okay.” Mary responded. She waits while you type the message and send it. “Are you having trouble with Maisie, with the curse?” She asks.

Of course you are having trouble with the curse. It’s the damned family curse. But you can’t tell her about it, you can’t tell her you just gave her first born daughter a master and that Holly doesn’t even know. But honestly, that’s not even what bothers you the most. You saw that face, you saw Holly’s reaction, and seeing her now, looking oblivious to that moment, that feeling. You can’t help but wonder if the curse made that feeling go away, or if it’s still there, inside her, just hidden from her. Is there a part of Holly that knows the truth? A Holly that hates you right now, but can't communicate it? The real Holly, not the one her master made forget about what you did. Some random guy in Jamaica made Holly forget that you betrayed her.

“Hey, babe.” Maisie says, nervously. Mary turns and walks away, her questions unanswered. Maisie sits down next to you, holds you as you sit. You can tell she wants to ask questions, but she knows better. It’s Maisie, she knows exactly how to handle you. She knew how you’d feel, knew better than to have you feel this way toward her. It was the right move, of course. It's not like Maisie was going to misread you. Not just for her either, if you felt this way towards Maisie, God that would be a much worse situation, especially with the power you have. . . You know all of that, and it still sucks.

“I can tell her not to come over.” Maisie offers. You shake your head.

“No, don’t cancel it for me.”

“Babe, you just did a very hard. . .”

You cut her off. “No, don’t tell me what a good job I did. I know exactly what I did. I know why I did it and I know the result. I don’t need you reframing it for me.” It comes out bitter, you don’t mean it to be bitter, you just want to feel this. You deserve to feel this, you need to sit with the weight of it for a while at least.

“It was that bad?” She asks. The only answer she gets is the tears that escape your eyes and run down your cheeks. She sees it and pulls you tighter to her, kissing your temple. “I’m sorry, babe.”

“I know, Maisie." You answer. "I know."