Step 1: Turn Every Man on the Planet Into A Woman

There were few computers on the planet that the Baxter Building's system could not access. Even Nick Fury would be surprised to know how many secrets Reed Richards had pried out from the dark places of the world—especially as a member of the Illuminati. Locked away under layers of security, inaccessible to anyone except himself...

...and his wife.

Sue Storm met every security question and challenge. High-tech probes confirmed that the Invisible Woman was not currently possessed or under the influence of any psychic. Elevated hormone levels were logged, but not sufficient to deny her access as she searched for what Porkum had ordered her to find.

In the bowels of Project Pegasus, the Wasp slipped between laser beams. Sensors in the most secure chamber, some of which had been designed by Reed Richards, registered her as only an insect. Multiple overlapping **** fields hummed in deadly synchronization around the target of her search. Her timing needed to be perfect...but she had that timing, from Reed Richard's own files. With the dead certainty granted by Porkum's pheromonal control, she launched herself forward, in that brief moment when a gap opened in the cycling energy fields.

To touch the surface of the Cosmic Cube.

Porkum held out his hand. There was a blip. Then the Wasp, and the cube, were in his pink palm. His fingers closed on the surface, his dark eye stared into the depths. It was difficult to focus on, as if his eyes kept sliding off of it. As the Wasp slid off and resumed her normal proportions, Porkum focused his will. These devices were, according to Sue Storm, extraordinarily powerful and dangerous.

The cube pulsed like a living thing, a throb that went down the length of his arm. It quivered in his grasp. There were cracks in its surface. This Cube had been reassembled from pieces of a broken one, and Porkum could see the lines of fracture that went through it. The whole thing vibrated, unstable, the power barely contained. Probably only enough juice for a single wish.

One was all he needed.

"Every man except me," he rumbled. "Becomes a woman."

Multicolored light exploded from Porkum's hand. The cube burst into glowing dust.

In the Time Variance Authority, a functionary noted that an entire timeline flashed pink and shifted slightly, an XK-gender-dominance-shift event logged.

Every Y-chromosome associated with homo sapiens and its various subspecies vanished. Every penis disappeared, as though they had never been, replaced by virgin vaginas. Breasts budded. Asses and hips expanded.

In the Baxter Building, Ben Grimm felt a seismic shift at the core of her being, massive stone mitts going to cover the tectonic tits that now graced her broad chest.

In Latveria, Doctor Doom collapsed, bent over as her new uterus and ovaries began their first period. As the armored monarch mastered the unexpected change, she felt a sudden need for chocolate.

At the Jean Grey School of Higher Learning, Wolverine's hairy crotch slammed into Ororo's snatch, and the two women stared at where they were no longer connected...and then at the breasts that budded on the small, hairy woman's chest.

In Asgard, Thor was polishing his hammer when the shaft suddenly disappeared. She stared down at the golden curls that surrounded a pink pussy. For a moment, her thought turned to Loki...and then curiosity and horniness had the warrior goddess rub a finger up and down her sensitive slit. An uncharacteristic quiver went through the Thunder Goddess' body, and Mjolnir responded to **** need, flying toward the goddess handle-first.

In the Blue Area of the Moon, the Watcher Uata felt a profound sense of loss as her penis vanished, overwritten by a higher cosmic power. Her eyes stared down at the globe, and she knew that around the world, the solar system, and even into immediate adjacent dimensions, the shift took place...and Porkum was now the old man in a world of women. At least, the only man with an organic cock. Her eyes focused on Avengers Tower. The android Vision stood spellbound as Captain America suddenly fell to her knees, her costume suddenly unable to fit a much more lithe, buxom form. As the pants slid down to reveal America's ass, the android's pants stirred.

Androids, apparently, did not count as men according to the Cosmic Cube. The Watcher allowed herself a small smile. Porkum was still new to this universe, and unaware of the odd ways his wish may go askew...

"Alright," Porkum said with a grin, ignorant of the Watcher and her rumination. "Now for Step 2."