Scenes From A Destination Wedding Weekend, Part 3: Spa Time!

Scarlet Copse-Wood-Smythe

{reveal "Author’s Note"} This is a more-or-less repeated scene from the main storyline, due to a communication snafu. It is also literally the only scene I thought I had scheduled for my branch from party breakfast to the evening party events, so I am still using it. I did an additional editing pass, including some paragraph reorganization (the back-and-forth collab writing style means conversation flow can sometimes get a little scatterbrained) so it will read slightly differently. Plus, I write in the present tense, so there is that. Enjoy. {endreveal}

Scarlet shivers a little from the cold. Granted, she always feels a little cold in places with a lot of water. There is a reason water is used as a heat sink. Air circulation wouldn’t leech nearly as much heat from her when it is dry.

The House of Quiet Waters is still beautiful, even if it is dropping Scarlet’s body temperature down to the mid 800 degrees Celsius; not enough to give her the oread equivalent of hypothermia, but enough to make her feel slightly uncomfortable. The veins of gold in the stone sparkle, almost mimicking the fiery glow of her obsidian marked skin. Scarlet sighs as she looks away from the ceiling and towards whoever she can see from her floatie.

She can hear her wife Daphne splashing around and laughing in the distance. She has probably found some deep enough pools to leap into. Her mermaid is always happiest in the water. Nearby, someone yelps as a splash from Daphne’s latest dive catches them off-guard. And, of course, Alex, her punk goth wish, is squeezing one of Scarlet’s obsidian pocked shoulders as she sits at the edge of the pool they are in.

“Water good, love?” Scarlet asked, not sure what answer she’ll get.

“It’s... fine,” the valkyrie replies, “not as good as the magma tub back at your spa...”

“Our spa,” Scarlet interjects.

Alex leans closer to her wife to finish her thought, “Okay, our spa, but this one is fine. You comfy, dudette? I could ask if we can commandeer a pool to fill with some lava?”

Scarlet takes advantage of Alex’s position by stealing a kiss. A little peck on the lips, nothing more, but filled with meaning. She murmurs into those black lipstick covered lips, “It’s okay. I will manage.”

“Are we intruding?” Marissa’s voice draws them out of their flirting. The therapist is standing on the edge of the pool, a slight smile on her face, wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around her midsection and failing miserably to conceal both her very respectful cleavage, and her permanently erect nipples. Next to her stands Laura, both of her bodies significantly shorter than Marissa, and also wrapped in matching hotel towels. Laura’s electric blue eyes glitter like sapphires in the soft light of the spa.

There is a carefulness to her, too — a stillness in how she holds herself that hasn’t been there before, like she is balancing something and doesn’t trust herself to move too fast.

“Oh, my rock-wife is just a little bit chilly right now,” Alex quips, only to get a love tap on the arm. She smiles as she mock-rubs the spot.

Scarlet carefully rolls to her side on her floatie, greeting, “Marissa, it’s been too long. I’d offer a hug, but me and this much water doesn’t exactly mix. This is Alex.”

The valkyrie takes a slight bow, “A pleasure to meet you, dudettes, and congrats on surviving the Hotel in advance. I heard - slash - saw a lot about you. How’s the pre-wedding jitters? They can be gnarly.”

Marissa grins at Scarlet. “We’ve become quite resilient here. A hug is definitely welcome.” She unknots the towel, folds it carefully and slides naked into the water with a sigh of pleasure.

Beside her, Laura studies Alex for a moment, then she nods with recognition. “Alex, really?” She smiles, delighted. “I recognize you from the plushie. Thank you for those, by the way. And, no jitters... Well,” she corrects herself, “not really. Andy and I... already got married a month ago, by Inanna. It wasn’t planned.” She shows the golden ring on her finger.

Alex lets out a long, low whistle. “Divinely gifted ring, huh? Fancy. Naked purple goddess mostly just gives me work.”

Scarlet wraps an arm around Alex’s neck in a loose, well above the water line hug, groaning, “Don’t taunt our boss, love. Eilistraee is crashing the wedding with Laura’s permission and she will prank you by calling you to a battlefield right before the reception.”

“Nah, she’d pull a better prank than that and wouldn’t dare ruin a performance. I am guessing slowly dissolving clothes during my set, so I’m naked by the end.” Alex pauses just long enough to jut out her bare breasts, “As if I would be ashamed of showing off the girls.”

“Forgive my wife, a century of our new home may have messed with us a little.”

“Ooh,” Alex notes, skipping over some potential awkwardness, “I arranged a totally rockin’ cover of the Bridal March for, you know, the bridal march. An extended edition, since there are seven of you. And my set for the reception is gonna blow the normies minds!”

Laura grins in stereo. “I’m looking forward to it. I’ll let the others know, as well, thank you.”

Laura takes off her towels, and slides both of her selves into the hot water. Her eyes focus on Alex. “I meant to say, thank you for your letter, back when Arabella opened our fanmail. It’s both weird and reassuring to know I’m not the only one who was brought back.” A shadow passes over her faces for a moment. Marissa notices, squeezes the hand of the closest of her bodies, but says nothing. Laura shakes off the moment and returns her attention to Alex. “So, a valkyrie? What’s that like?”

“Oh, it’s pretty rad. I’m sure you heard the saying, ‘Be yourself, unless you can be a dragon, then be a dragon instead?’ Being a valkyrie is a lot like that. I rock bikini armor like nobody’s business, I can fly, and do all sorts of metal stuff. Now, I imagine those Odin Valkyries may have different opinions, but naked purple goddess mostly just lets me do my own thing. But, when duty calls, I gotta be off.”

Alex unfurls her wings, carefully wrapping them around Scarlet to keep her a bit warmer, then continues, “I know that the topic might be... sensitive, but battlefields are a spiritually messy thing. So many dying all at once on so many divine sides. The regular reaper types get so lost and confused. And the bureaucracy of afterlife dispatch is a huge pain. So, my job is to wade into the thick of it to find the faithful valiant slain and make sure they get their due reward in Svartlheim instead of being stuck in Arborea or Valhalla or,” a brief pause to shudder, “The Demonweb Pits.”

Scarlet adds, “It does help that your thing is stuff Eilistraee likes anyways.”

“Yeah. Jamming out tunes, learning about languages, practicing how to eat a certain oread out. Life is pretty good. Of course, I am sure you guys have a great life laid out once the show is over.”

Marissa nods hesitantly. “I am not sure how up to date you are with our season. In any case, tomorrow promises to be... challenging.”

Laura frowns. “What she means is that Ereshkigal is coming for me. Because I was brought back via her Edict, she gets to take a life in exchange. And we think she’s coming tomorrow.”

“That is a distinct possibility,” Scarlet notes, “Arabella made us sign paperwork.”

“Yup, Harp was especially annoyed. She was totally planning on causing a ruckus. But, we didn’t want to be a bummer, you know?”

“What my wife is trying to say,” the oread declares, “is that we are sure that Andy and the rest of you will have figured out that loophole. He’ll save you.”

Laura smiles faintly. “Not yet, but I’m sure you are right.” She takes a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring the mood down. It should be a party, not a wake.”

Marissa nods, taking the cue. “Alex, it’s good to finally meet you. Last time Scarlet and I met, neither you nor Laura were back yet.” She looks at Scarlet and leaned back against the edge of the pool. “Andy tells me that a hundred years passed for you, while for us, the party was about one month ago. How is life after Harem Hotel?”

“We haven’t truly escaped it, honestly. Harper’s been hosting a season. The Mistress is over... there.”

To the side, a young Asian woman is giggling and whispering, her partner – a young dirty blonde neither Marissa nor Laura knew – darting glances at other women and joining in the giggling.

Marissa raises an eyebrow.

“Anyway, not that you’ve done much for the season, Scar,” Alex teases, “My lovely rock-wife has a super fancy spa right across from the castle. She’s been training temple acolytes in the art of massage. Our equally lovely fish-wife has three sets of twins, one set fully grown, one set mermaid teenagers, one set mermaid toddlers, plus a bunch of magically-made megalodons she’s grown strangely attached to? Harp took over for Aelene’s mom as Queen back home and things are going pretty well. And Tina has hatched sooooo many kids. Seriously, like 8 to 10 kids a year, for a century.”

Marissa grins, looking at Scarlet. “I have that coupon I intend to redeem when we’re out of here.”

It takes Laura a beat to catch up to the word megalodons, then a slow smile. “Megalodons, you say.” Marissa elbowed one of her, and she seemed to regain some composure.

“There have been sad moments, of course. A hundred years of living will do that. We buried my parents close to 60 years ago now; I still miss them. We’ve buried grandkids who died of old age. It tears Harper up inside, every time. But, Harper and all of us are generally doing well. So, the game can have a happy ending; I’m sure you’ll get there.”

The grandkids comment catches up with them a moment later; Marissa and Laura both grow somber. “I’m sorry,” Laura says, “That must hurt so much. Andy mentioned that your exit packages from Harem Hotel didn’t include a longer lifespan for your children. Is there anything we can do to help?”

Marissa nods. “Andy’s Coauthor Gift works on transformations, now, too. He’s used it to ameliorate Katherine’s elimination and partially free her.” The subtext is clear: he might help with their exit packages, too.

Laura adds, “I mean, I probably could help too, but he’s the one with the full-strength Gift. As the Consort, I have part of it too, but I don’t know that I can affect TFs.”

Marissa looks at Laura with some surprise. Laura, reading her expression, shrugs. “Arabella said the Consort gains all the Master’s Gifts to a degree. I’ve never had the chance to try any of them so far, but I’m fairly sure she meant more than the strength and resilience Andy has.”

“I’m not sure if either of you could do much about that particular problem,” Scarlet notes, “You’d be changing the nature of our Wish, not our exit transformations. Also, I’m not sure if the issues of extending that part of our Wish to our children would be a universally good thing. About half of the hoppalong population in the capital are already related to Tina in some fashion. Harper has had to pass legislation to prevent inbreeding from that. If all of Tina’s kids lived as long as she is likely to...”

“...we’d be up to our eyeballs in horny bunny-girls,” Alex quips, “Buuuuuut, if you want to test drive your potential Co-Author power, there is a transformation that hurts Harp a lot. She apparently tried to fix it in the shop during the game, but couldn’t address the key problem.” The valkyrie looks towards Skye, relaxing with the harem's drow children, trading gardening tips with Hazel. The punk goth continues, “Embarrassed Clothed Female. While our family naturalism rules help, Skye has had to miss so many events simply because Harp needs to be clothed in court and Skye being around her like that causes her to faint. She spent Harp’s court marriage to her other wife outside, for naked purple goddess’s sake! Tweaking that to where Skye can see Harp at court would make them both smile.”

Laura hesitates. “That sounds a little complicated for a first attempt. But I can ask Andy about it. I’m sure if we put both our head to it, the lovable idiot and I can figure out something for Skye’s sake.”

Marissa, in the meantime, listens to the issue regarding the hoppalong population. “I hope for Dawn’s sake that her biology isn’t the same as Tina’s, no offense meant. The poor girl would probably be mortified.”

Scarlet tries her best to reassure her friend, “I’d lean towards Dawn being much closer to human reproductive cycles than Tina. The cat-girl populations at home have gestation times of 5 or 6 months and Claire has the usual pregnancy time, right?”

“Also, those newborn baby hoppalongs are sooo adorable. Imagine tiny babies that can fit in the palm of your hand with bunny ears! They grow quick, but they’re cute.” Alex coos.

“You do an excellent job avoiding diaper changes, Alex.”

“I think the ‘I help feed them, someone else deals with poopie diapers’ strategy is a perfectly fine division of labor.”

Scarlet turns to the others, rolling her eyes, to advise, “Seriously, you all should think about having a household manager wherever you settle. Even with Skye as the Royal Steward overseeing a large staff, the nursery wing is a madhouse too often.”

Marissa's cheeks turn faintly pink. “Ah, about Claire… she had her first OB/GYN pregnancy visit last week, and apparently her gestation period is around 6 months, with virtual certainty of multiples due to her fertility transformation.”

Laura pats Marissa’s shoulder reassuringly. “I’m sure Claire will be okay. I’m the one-” She suddenly cuts off, eyes wide, biting her lower lip. Marissa looks at her in surprise.

“Did you just prank Cat-girl with a reality altering transformation?” Alex asks.

Laura blinks. “No!” She exclaims, her composure slipping. “Claire got a fertility transformation a few rounds ago, before I even returned.”

Marissa’s eyes narrow at Laura, then widen. “Oh!” She says, realizing what Laura meant. “Are you sure?”

Laura nods sheepishly in stereo. “Yeah. Arabella confirmed it. Please keep it to yourselves – I haven’t told everyone yet.”

Marissa opens her mouth as if to say something, then closes it. “Okay,” she says, “But does Andy know?”

Laura blinks. “He does. I told him as soon as I was sure.”

Scarlet mutters, mostly to herself, “I could have sworn Dinah said that Claire’s pregnancy was going to be the normal amount of time...”

Alex relaxes into the pool a bit more, then asks, “So, have you worked out the wedding consummation thing yet? There are seven of you and one of him. That takes... logistics.”

Grateful to shift topics—grateful enough that her laugh comes out a half-beat too bright—Laura looks at Alex in stereo, two pairs of electric blue eyes staring at the Valkyrie as she replies, “Well, Andy can split, so that makes it easier. The... logistics... becomes easier to manage. Trust me. I would know.” She gestures at her two bodies knowingly. Then her expression grows dark. “Besides, we need to get past the debt first.”

Marissa hugs Laura's nearest body fiercely. “You will be fine.”

Laura looks back at Marissa. “Maybe. But I still wonder—” She cuts herself off. “Nevermind. I’m sorry, it looks like I’m not the greatest company today. Chalk it up to pre-wedding jitters?”

Marissa’s eyes linger on her a beat too long, the particular look she gets when a patient answered a smaller question to dodge a bigger one. She lets it go. Whatever this actually is, it isn’t jitters-shaped, and she’s learned by now that Laura will say so herself when she is ready to.

“You got it, dudette!”

“I’ll tell you like I told Nyadia, with some fixed names. Andy loves you and wants to spend the rest of his very, very long life with you. He saved you once, he will do it again. Those nerves are just nagging little doubts about that. You’ll be fine.”

Alex teases, “Not going to add ‘and you can masturbate to make those doubts go away?’”

Scarlet glares at her punk-wife, “I’m not going to use that transformation without disclosure first, love.”

Laura blinks at Alex’s tease, and Marissa intervenes. “Scarlet can prescribe cures for neurological disorders that standard therapy couldn’t solve,” she says, “and true to form for Harem Hotel, they are sexual prescriptions.”

Laura giggles, in stereo, then looks almost surprised at the mirth. “That’s... a really useful transformation, actually.”

Marissa nods, looking at Scarlet fondly. “You know, as strange as it is to know we first wrote each other a century ago, from your perspective... You’ve been a really good friend throughout all this. I’m trying to be more open with my emotions, and... I wanted to thank you. I know Andy feels the same about Harper, too.”

Scarlet rolls her eyes at Laura’s quip, then replies, “Thank you, Marissa. We were in a very dark place when we first made contact and you helped me hold most everyone together through it. I don’t think we would have gotten out nearly as well without Andy and you. I wouldn’t have my Alex back at the very least. I’m glad that I was able to help you in my small way. I’m sure that Harper has already offered this to Andy multiple times by now, but, whatever you all need, whenever you need it, we’ll do our best to help. Just say the word.”

Alex beams and wraps Scarlet up in her wings a little tighter. She leans her head back and Scarlet gives her another kiss.

“Love you, dudette.”

“Right back at you, love.”

Marissa smiles at Scarlet. “Have you had a chance to speak with Dinah yet?” She asks.

Scarlet looks around for Dinah, seeing her pinned down by Tracy in her lap, who is trying to get a good breast groping in. Claire is busy writing something down on a small chalkboard right by the two of them.

“Not yet, though I am sure we’ll have some time today to catch up; it’s pretty early in the party. Harper and I were also planning on making a trip to the Hollow Garden in the early morning, once she comes out of her reverie. With the Hollow Garden on a different time scale, we should be able to spend a couple of hours catching up before we’ll need to prepare for the wedding.”

Laura nods. “I think Dinah will appreciate that. She said there were women there whom Harper sent during your endgame.”

“And a couple of eliminated guys, too. That guy that got turned into a flock of pigeons is...” Alex shuddered.

Marissa looks at Katherine, who is happily relaxing in the hot water, eyes closed, head tilted back, a beatific expression on her face, and adds, “Maybe see if Katherine wants to come, too. Dinah mentioned that many of the women there would benefit from meeting someone who came back from an elimination TF. It would give them hope.”

Scarlet nods, “We’ll check with Katherine, assuming it doesn’t eat up too much of her free time. I wouldn’t want her to miss the reception because we had her get out of the painting at 2 AM, HH time.”

Laura glances at Marissa and nods. “Right. Doesn’t Mona also have someone who came back from elimination in her harem?”

“Jenny’s over there,” Scarlet points. The dryad is nervously sitting between Hazel and Erin, all in a row. “She hasn’t gotten used to our brand of nymph not needing sleep yet and she’s been having nightmares about her situation being reversed. It might help her too? She does a lot better when she can focus outside of herself.”

Marissa looks at Jenny, her eyes soft, and she nods. “That would help her, I think. As would spending time with Katherine, perhaps. Reversing eliminations is so rarely done, that each of them should be a source of joy, not nightmares.”

Laura looks at the dryad and takes a deep breath. “Erin and Hazel at least have something in common with her. They can help her come out of herself a bit. But I understand how it feels to be trapped in a story you’re afraid will end badly.” She looks at Alex. “I’m glad to hear you are happy, and so is Scarlet, and so are the others.” She smiles. “It’s good to know someone else who understands what it means, to come back.”

Alex offers Laura a fist bump, “Like I said, we’re a rare breed, dudette. Don’t forget. And hold on to the ones that fought to get you back. You deserve it.”

Alex sees the grinning Laura in stereo. She meets the valkyrie’s fist, one body touching her pinkie, the other her pointer finger. Alex pulls back, opening her fist enough to waggle her fingers, then lets out a Thaumaturgy enhanced explosion noise so loud that the reverberations startle Katherine — dozing in her favorite corner of the pool — wide awake and mildly panicked. Water sloshes over the stone as Katherine blinks upright. For half a second something old and wary crosses her face — then she clocks Alex’s delighted cackling, and it melts into a small, real smile. She flicks a little water in the valkyrie’s direction, missing by a mile, and settles back against the warm stone. Alex just grins, unrepentant, wings still curled around Scarlet.

“Worth it,” she says, and nobody argues.