SBAT Chapter 9

“My hands are tired,” Steph confesses. 4%.

“Well, thanks. Like I said,” Demi says as she takes her feet off the table. “My wife’s pregnant, so I’m the one spoiling her. That was really nice. It’s OK if you want to take that off,” she adds, waving at Steph’s costume.

“I’d better keep it on.”

“You just look hot.”

“I am hot, but I’m already trapped in hell. I don’t want to be trapped in hell and naked.”

“I can give you something to wear.”

“I’m a little suspicious of you being so nice.”

Demi raises her hands in surrender. “I don’t care about being naked here. Hell, I spend more time in this office than I do at home.” She unbuttons her blouse, but doesn’t take it off. She fans herself vigorously, then leans out of sight and there is the familiar sound a mini fridge opening. She comes up with a diet soda. “Want one?”

Steph hesitates, then gives in. “Thanks.” She holds her soda and watches enviously as Demi rolls her cold can over her skin. Steph’s costume makes that impossible. She’s sweltering. Still, cold fluids are a big help. She pops the can and drains half of it.

“I know what you’re doing,” Steph says. “Being so sexy.”

Demi lets out a guffaw. “I’ll take that as a compliment, but you’re wrong. I used to do succubus work, but I don’t anymore. And if I wanted to seduce you, I’d look at your file.” She taps keys one-handed as she sips. Tim’s face appears on the screen. “Maybe I’d show up as him. Or at the very least, I’d use a male form.”

“You can do that?”

“Can’t you?”

“Well, I took this **** that gave me a penis and I’m pretty gay now,” Steph says.

“Good for you. You can never have too many options. To being pretty gay,” Demi says, lifting her soda.

Steph laughs and lifts hers. “Yeah, it’s been a trip. People I’d never have looked at, I look at. Women that were just my friends, now I have… weird feelings about. It is a mess.”

“Tell me more.”

“I probably shouldn’t.”

Demi grins. “Now you’re the one teasing me. Acting all mysterious and hard to get but hinting that you have a dick? How is that fair?”

“It wasn’t on purpose.”

“Demons have needs too.” Demi’s almost pouting. She’s too pretty. Steph looks away and takes a drink as Demi goes on. “I’d be lying if I said I don’t miss the succubus gig. Flexible hours, more excitement. But you never promoted unless you land a big fish, and that’s mostly luck. If I do my time here, I can get a director’s spot. I’m about to have a family, you know?”

Steph winces.

“Oh. Oh, right. Right. Sorry.” Demi glances at the screen. “Your baby. Well, not a baby anymore by now, huh? She’d be, what… seven or eight years old?”

Steph’s eye twitches. “Let’s talk about something else.”

Demi nods. “Sure. What do you want to talk about?”

“You said **** was pointless.”

“No. I asked what the point was. Two different things,” Demi says with a smile, tugging at her bra to let a little air get to her skin. “Phew,” she adds.

“What do you want from people?”

“You want me to give you the secrets of the universe for free? For a foot rub?”

“No. Sorry.”

“I’m just teasing.” Demi giggles and rolls her eyes. “You want to know? Fine.”

“Really? You’ll just tell me?”

“Why shouldn’t I? Besides, maybe I can help you understand. It’s like you think we’re the bad guys.”

“You are the bad guys. You’re a literal demon in literal hell.”

“Sweetie,” Demi says, giving her a familiar look of something condescension adjacent. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.” She struggles out of her damp blouse and tosses it aside, then clasps her hands on the desk and leans forward. A drop of sweat runs down her red skin, vanishing into her mouthwatering cleavage. Steph drags her eyes up to Demi’s face. “That world that you came here from? How are things going there?”

Steph licks her lips. “Not great.”

“Did we make that world?” Demi points at herself. “No. And no matter what you’ve heard from those very trustworthy and unproblematic people in the Vatican, we are not the reason that your world is the way that it is. You think we’re the problem? The people telling you that are literally, not figuratively, the most heinous hypocrites ever. And you people aren’t any better.”

“Excuse me?”

“Nobody cared when they were burning mentally ill women or selling indulgences or doing all their other shit. But then we hit the twentieth century and cut over to god’s chosen country of entitled douchebags and one news story pops off about the Roman Catholic Church systematically hiding sexual **** and now everyone wants to jump on the bandwagon! It was fine when they were fucking up European politics for centuries, exploiting and abusing indigenous people—but then we found out about those priests and suddenly it was real.”

“I don’t see how it’s a problem that people were offended by that. I was offended by that,” Steph says, a little affronted. “People should be mad.”

“That’s the problem. Not what they did. You. You, and everyone else. You want to act like it was this big fucking revelation,” Demi almost says it in a snarl. “But it wasn’t. It was never a secret. Everyone knew. For centuries. You just looked the other way. You didn’t see what you didn’t want to see until someone rubbed your noses in it. So don’t come in here acting like you’re the good guys. Even if good and bad were real things, you wouldn’t be what you think you are.”

Steph clears her throat. “That escalated.”

Demi deflates. “Yeah, sorry. I was human once, and…” She waves a hand and shakes her head. “Never mind. But fuck those guys, and fuck you if you’re going to try to go to bat for them. No pun intended.”

“Fair enough,” Steph says.

Demi leans down out of sight again. “You want another soda?”

9%.