Rob and Andrew Hit Off

The next day, Andrew was over my place playing video games. Rob dropped by spontaneously. He was about to leave upon seeing Andrew, but I convinced my best friend to stay for a while.

It was awkward at first, with Rob and I talking like Andrew wasn’t in the room while the three of us had our hands on controllers. At one point, Rob and Andrew eliminated me from the game, not realizing they were both doing the same thing to me separately. Upon figuring out why I was no longer in the game, a sight I never thought I would see happened right in front of me – my alpha male best friend high-fived the guy he referred to as “the neighborhood loser.” Their eyes squinted while laughing aloud at me right in front of me, and the inferiority feeling I had around Rob suddenly got kicked into overdrive. I heard Rob whisper to Andrew, “let’s do it again!”, and each time I re-entered the game, Andrew and Rob killed me instantly, laughing harder each time they did it. Once I gave up, they kicked back and continued playing the game against each other, talking to one another like they were long-time friends. About 10 minutes into their conversation, Andrew looked over in my direction.

“Eh…make yourself useful and get me a beer-ah.” My tag-along friend instructed me.

I’m not sure why I didn’t say “go get one yourself,” but when I scurried to the fridge to fetch the kid one of my premium beers, I heard Rob chuckle, and from my peripheral vision, saw him fist-bump Andrew.

“Get me one too, buddy,” Rob shouted my way.

I returned with two beers in hand. Andrew stopped Rob short of taking one.

“Eh…that bottle cap’s not going to twist itself off-ah….” Andrew said to me with an eyebrow raised. I immediately twisted off both bottle caps and handed them over to my two guests. Neither one of them thanked me when taking them out of my hands.

Andrew took a sip and put his beer bottle down on my newly-installed hardwood floor, still playing the video game with Rob. It didn’t take long for his size thirteen foot to knock over the bottle, making the foamy beer spill all over the ground. I threw a hissy-fit when Andrew didn’t make any attempt to clean up his mess – he just looked down at it, then looked at me, then back at the TV screen, thumbs still on the controller. I grabbed a sponge, leaped to my knees in front of him and absorbed the spreading spill.

“Eh…quick –it’s gonna hit my sock-ah!” Andrew shouted at me, but I was too late – some of the beer touched the sole of Andrew’s holey white sweat sock.

I complained about Andrew’s clumsiness, but looked up and saw that neither him nor Rob, were listening to anything I said, engrossed in their conversation. On all fours, I continued to soak up the last of the beer, when suddenly, Andrew stretched his legs out on my back.

“Ahhhhh….” Andrew exhaled, getting comfortable with his feet perched up on my spine. “Much better.”

With that one action, I felt an intangible connection form between Rob and my tag-along friend. My alpha male best friend laughed at Andrew’s act of superiority over me. With his feet still on my back, Andrew asked me if I wanted some beer, and when I turned my head to face him, Andrew shoved his stinky socked-foot in my mouth for the second time that week. With the sole of the sock almost black, I could taste more sweat than dirt or beer on the cotton sock. Rob’s laughter egged Andrew on as he began shoving his socked-big toe in and out of my mouth like I was performing fellatio on it. I was trying to process just how big Andrew’s feet were. His big toe alone was like four of mine put together.

Still on all fours, I pushed Andrew’s foot away, and like a klutz, lost my balance, flipping around 180 degrees on the slippery wet hardwood. Andrew saw that as an opportunity to humiliate me further, resting the meat of his foot directly on my face, with my nose unable to breathe in anything but the sole of my so-called bully’s dirty sweat sock. I tried to push him away, intending to get up, but Andrew placed more pressure on his foot, making it difficult to get back on my feet. Rob’s laughter was incentive enough for Andrew to keep his foot on my face, while I struggled to break free and suck in fresh air at the same time.

“C’mon, buddy!” Rob mocked me, watching me give my all to take my tag-along friend’s foot off my face. “You can do it!”

I was relieved when Andrew took one foot off my face and assumed he was done making me look like a complete wimp in front of my alpha male best friend. I should have known better. The only reason Andrew took his foot of my face was to take his dirty sock off, before shoving it right in my mouth. I went wide-eyed, my head sandwiched between the beer-stained hardwood flooring and the meat of Andrew’s size thirteen bare foot. My lips were on the center of his sole, and I’ll never forget the taste of his sweat or the sight of his pinkish-pale toes above my eyes. From Rob’s perspective, it had looked like I was worshiping my tag-along friend’s foot. I had never heard my buddy laugh for this long before – if Andrew’s goal was to impress Rob at my expense, he was batting a thousand.

“Eh…what smells worse?” Andrew asked, looking down at me. “My sock or my foot-ah?”. Rob was almost in tears from laughing so hard.

“What tastes worse,” Andrew continued to taunt, brushing my front teeth with his big toe in my already sock-gagged mouth. “My sock or my toe?”

He finally took his foot off my face, taking off the other sock and tossing it down at me, telling me I could keep them both.

“Eh…here. Something to beat off with tonight-ah…” he chuckled.

Andrew finally got up and walked into my bedroom, pulled out a fresh, unopened pack of socks from my drawer, and took out a brand-new pair. My tag-along friend didn’t even bother putting the pack back in the drawer or closing it. Instead, he tossed the bag on the floor, walked back over to the couch while sidestepping the spill by stepping on my back, sat back down, and began putting the new, unworn socks on. The torment Andrew put me through didn’t even phase him, something that impressed both Rob and me for different reasons.

I rose to my feet and began throwing another hissy fit, telling Andrew to leave my place. To my shock, Rob immediately came to the defense of his newfound friend.

“Why does he have to leave?” Rob asked me as if I was the one behaving inappropriately. Andrew just chuckled, slipped on his running shoes, grabbed his jacket, and made his way towards the door.

“Andrew, wait up!” Rob shouted, dropping the video game controller to catch up to his new buddy without even acknowledging me. “Don’t leave me alone with the footfag!”