Reality Intrudes

A short while later my kicking back on the couch, beer in hand, as I watched some forgettable show was interrupted when as much to my amazement power and vitality flooded into me. I sat up in shock, looking about wide eyed at I felt like fire was flowing through my veins. Thankfully the pain didn't last very long, replaced by a soothing heat that seemed to radiate from my core. "What the fuck?" I'd gone from a bit drowsy to wide awake and humming with energy. I felt like a could run a dozen marathons back to back without breaking a sweat. And there was something more, a feeling of potential, like lightning in a bottle. I could feel this heat straining to be used somehow.

Shaking my head I set the beer down on the table, next to three empties. Had to be the beer. Dad had had the fridge stocked with all kinds of fancy foreign beers that I'd been sampling. There was a massive liquor cabinet as well, but I hadn't bothered with it yet. The drink was obviously getting to me, must be way more potent than the cheap ass shit I was used to or something.

I needed to sober up.

And just like that I was. Just the thought and I was suddenly stone cold sober. What the ever living fuck was going on?! Looking about for some answers my gaze fell on the tablet for my dad's stupid harem game. The loading bar was gone, replaced by some text and two pictures. Spinning it around so I could take a better look I saw

Perks downloaded to file and uploaded to user. Two waifus ready for transfer. One system message waiting.

The pictures below were of a beautiful stacked blonde that looked about my age and a older even more stacked woman with auburn hair. Tsunade and Mei from the catalogue. Hang on, perks uploaded to user?! Endless Stamina! Powerhouse! Master fucking Healer!! The catalogue was real?! Not some game but really effecting me? No fucking way, no this was all in my head. No way I just used some secret ancient ninja technique to purge the **** from my system by accident.

"Okay, stay calm. This is not your brain cracking under the pressure. Probably" I needed some way I could really test this impossibility. I could cut myself and try to heal it, but that seemed pretty fucking stupid. Wait! I'd gotten that storage space thing! That should be easy enough to test. I picked up a empty beer bottle and looked at the Asian styled tiger on it's side. Right, so how did I store shit? Sobering up had just taken a thought, so I willed the bottle stored and it vanished from my hand.

I blinked at my empty hand for a second. "Holy fucking shit!" I picked up the other two empties and just as quickly they were gone too. What the fuck had my old man signed up for? Then I thought of his heart attack in disgust. "Just another month more and you could have healed yourself. Fuck."

Here I was sitting in my dad's house, now mine, drinking my dad's beer, now mine, with crazy ass powers that should have gone to him. Now mine. Fuck!

Oh right, and two real women from a manga that were waiting for me somehow. Also a message it said. Looking back the word message was blinking green on the screen. Fuck it, I tapped the word with a finger and a text box opened up.

"Very sneaky grabbing the extra waifu with your last perk. WSYCOHO totally fooled the system into believing you had the right to grab as many waifus as you wanted, but the perks don't work on administrators. We can't have you just grabbing all the waifus willy nilly and totally throwing the game balance off so that loophole has now been closed." I read out loud to myself. Of course they fucking caught me, now how bad was it going to be? "However we like to reward initiative so not only are we letting your acquisition of Mei Terumi stand but in future weeks we will be adding three waifu vouchers to your usual nine regular ones. These will only let you buy waifus, but that includes those on the weeks list or any others from that weeks source material that are valid choices as usual. Enjoy." Huh. Well that wasn't bad. Good in fact, if **** more women from what I had thought of as fictional worlds could be considered good...

Now that I knew this was real I tried to recall what the opening of the page had said about the women, or waifus as they put it. Something about being as close to your ideal as canonically possible. And the Milf Magnet meant these two would be interested. Who Says You Can Only Have One would keep any jealousy at bay putting harem building on easy mode so long as I could interest them. What if they just walked off though? I'd picked Bondage Expert before knowing this was real, but might still need it. I quickly used my phone to look up what waifu meant anyways. Apparently it's just Japanese for wife but there were broader contexts in the weeb communities. So they would see themselves as my wife? Really really good thing I'd grabbed that last perk then, I doubted many would be into sharing normally. Still it should make things easier even if they are just open to a relationship.

While I was at it I did some quick research on both women, not being a huge Naruto fan I only had some vague knowledge there. Both village leaders, both really powerful, both considered Milf's though neither had had children. I had to laugh. I was about to go from not even dating a girl since high school to having not one but two wives. Good luck finding a girl while working dead end retail jobs these days, not that I was working right now, or needed to with dad's money. But I didn't want to fend off gold diggers either. Why not a couple of fantasy babes, and binding them was just a precaution. Sure, keep telling yourself that Mike...

So who to bring in first? Mei had some easy hooks if what I read was right, but Tsunade would probably let her guard down easier without the other Kage there. And she was a sucker for a bet, and a drinking problem... Yeah that should work.

Tsunade first then. I rushed about the house to grab some things I might need first, including a quick raid of the previously unexplored liquor cabinet finding something perfect.

Sitting back down in front of the tablet I wondered how I was supposed to call up the pictured waifus. Well it was a touch screen. "Fuck it." I leaned forward and tapped the image of the busty blonde and a fucking smoke bomb went off in the living room.