Scare it off

"Sure it's big for a parrot," she reasoned, "but it's still just a parrot. Those pants are as good as mine. A five ounce bird cannot carry a one pound pair of shorts!" With this in mind she crouched low and snuck through the shadows of the palm tree above, closer and closer to the bird. The bird seemed oblivious of her. She reached the edge of the shadow, readied into a sprinting position, then charged the parrot! The bird, startled, took to flight. Lexi was right; it wasn't taking the pants anywhere.

What she hadn't considered, however, was that the bird would defend its treasure. With a loud shriek the parrot flew directly at Lexi, talons extended. Lexi was caught completely by surprise and had barely enough time to lift her arms over her head, protecting her face from the angry bird. The parrot scratched her arms as it flew past, still squawking in a shrill voice. Lexi could tell it was only a surface wound, but it still hurt, a lot! She kept running, and reached down to grab the shorts without stopping. As she grabbed the shorts the parrot swooped down on her and clawed at whatever it could reach -- which happened to be Lexi's tight butt. Lexi yelped and jumped upright at this sneak attack, almost dropping the shorts. She didn't stop running though, and soon had the shorts secure in her right hand. The parrot showed no signs of backing down; it wanted those shorts back!

Lexi decided her best bet was losing the bird in the thick vegetation on the main island. The water between the two islands was fairly shallow here, only reaching up to Lexi's hips, but it was still enough to slow her down. She pushed through the water as fast as she could, trying to slap away the parrot whenever it flew towards her. The relentless bird seemed to double its attacks while Lexi waded across the gap, swooping and scratching at her even more than before. Again, Lexi wasn't scared for her life by any means, but she was getting annoyed with this dumb bird! As she slogged through the water she was swatting at the bird with both hands, using her shorts as a weapon to extend her reach. At one perilous moment the parrot grasped the shorts in its beak, trying to pry them from Lexi's hand. Lexi was pissed; she had worked too hard for these shorts, and they weren't gonna be taken away by some loud, rainbow-looking jerkwad! She reared back with her left hand and punched the bird in the face. The parrot let go of her shorts and flopped into the water, where it began splashing, squawking, and flailing in absolute fury. Lexi made it out of the water and dove into the forest, crawling into a bush nearby. She still had shorts in her hand, but she hadn't inspected them since the bird attack. For the moment, though, she was safe.