Orbiting Druidia

A long shot of a giant spacecraft that looks vaguely familiar rolls by. It vaguely resembles a gigantic maid, but this one is extremely dark in color and sports an extremely large Cannon directly from its crotch section, accompanied by two enormous, pendulous radar dishes which track back and forth menacingly as the vehicle slowly rolls past. The cannon turns and fires repeatedly at a nearby planet, each releasing a small pod which falls through the half deconstructed air shield towards the planet.

The camera focuses on a white streaking pod, trailing its re entry chute desperately from behind as it smashes into a pair of very nice looking hills. A dark red light seems to glow within, as a black clad figure struggles out of the crater. We recognize clearly the dark armor of a Spaceball Warrior, who looks around for a moment, before removing the large black circular helmet from his head and breathing in the air.

"Ooooooh... smell that air... Smells so good and fresh..." The Spaceball takes another deep breath of the lovely mountain air, before pulling a large brown cigar from his pocket and lighting it. He takes several long drags before casually tossing it into the underbrush and walking away as the bush bursts into flames. He smiles for a moment, before digging though his pocket and pulling out a cell phone.

"Yes, sir. You told me to told you as soon as I landed, Sir."

The Spaceball pauses for a moment, listening.

"I landed, Sir."

The Spaceball sits for several minutes, clearly listening on his phone as the forest continues to burn behind him, engulfing his pod and the crater as he pulls a small notepad from his pocket and continues to jot notes.

"Yes, Sir... Got it... Use the provided explosives to ****... hang on, is that one R or two?"

Several detonations cooked off behind the Spaceball, shooting large fireworks into the air.

"Oh, it's NOT ****, so what was I supposed to do... " The Spaceball turns, noting that his landing vehicle is now so much slag. "No Sir, I totally paid attention in the briefing, Sir."

The Spaceball takes a look at a passing woman in an elegant dress, and licks his lips. She Takes no notice of the burning flames behind him and merely continues on with a wave, and a wink.

"Yes... yes... totally sir..." The Spaceball nodded, looking into the middle distance. The camera Pans towards a large themed casino that clearly juts from the center of pristine forest. The sight of firefighters spraying water to protect ONLY the casino as several small houses nearby burn is obvious. "And Happy UnBirthday to you again today Sir. Yes Sir, I know I don't have to kiss your ass, but you said you liked it. Sir."

The Spaceball consults his phone again, this time with a nearly nude picture of a dark haired woman covered with Spacebucks, and a bit of creative airbrushing. Underneath is listed the name "Vespa".

"This time, she won't get away, Sir. Really, the laugh too, Sir? Yes, Sir. This time the Female Use Tactical Army will rise, and the Spaceballs will be once again Supreme! Bwhahahahahaha! HHmmmm? Longer Sir? Bwhaahahahaahahahaahahahahahaaa! Yes Sir, Thank you Sir."

The Spaceball put away his cell phone before looking down at his helmet.

"But first... I have to act like a Dru..." The Spaceball commented. "Hmmmm...."