Some Naughty-looking Flowers

"What the hell kind of flowers are these?" you exclaim as you look around the lush alien landscape. You and your landing party had just finished materializing in the middle of a large field filled with two types of flowers growing on tall, flexible stalks. One type has large outer petals that fold back around a slit-shaped opening lined with smaller inner petals and a tiny bud near the top. The other type of flower has a green sack-like protrusion with two bulges at the base and tightly rolled petals that form a slightly curved cylinder shape which fans out at the top before folding back inward to make a rounded point. Both types vary greatly in size from as small as your fingertip to as large as your head.

"They look like..."

"...pussies and dicks," Sandy says with a grin, finishing your sentence for you.

The botanists scowl. "Don't be so crass," the female botanist says. "They're beautiful flowers, and we need to collect some samples for study."

"We need to see if these plants have any nutritional or medicinal properties," one of the male botanists adds.

"Nutritional?" you hear Sandy say under her breath. You both look at each other and suppress a shared laugh at the thought of eating pussy-petals and dick-weeds.

"Let's fan out and collect as many different varieties as we can find," the other male botanist, probably the team leader, says with what passes for an authoritative tone in the science division.

"Psst, over here," Sandy whispers as she motions for you to follow her to a spot behind some tall dick-blossoms, out of view from the team of botanists.

As you reach the spot, she nods to an especially large pussy-flower in full bloom and dripping with nectar. Bright colored stripes streak down the deep crimson petals, drawing your eyes to its sweet smelling center. Your gaze is strangely fixated on the flower as if it has an almost hypnotic effect on you. With some effort, you pull your eyes away from the flower and look at Sandy who is wearing a mischievous grin across her face.

"I dare you to stick your dick in it," she says playfully.

"What? No way! You're crazy!"

"Oh, come on John. It's just a harmless flower. What's the matter? You're not afraid of getting caught, are you?"

"Caught? No, you know I don't care what the Blueshirts think. It's just... why would I want to do that?"

"I'll tell you what. If you do it, I'll get you a date with Thompson. I've seen how you look at her. She's my roommate, so we talk a lot."

You would love the chance to go on a date with Thompson. "Wait, isn't she dating Lieutenant Commander Giotto?"

"Their relationship is on the rocks. Trust me, he's not going to be around much longer. What do you say, Big Boy? I'll make sure you get some rebound action if you stick your dick in that flower."