The presentation

I feel waves of giddiness that, for the first time, I have actually intentionally tried to trip Victoria up. If I keep my eyes open, I might get a chance to hit her hard, then quit. I'm torn between wanting her to know that I put her in her place, or just to get away with it without suspicion. It would be less hassle if I could do it anonymously. I could just scramble details of every item in her calendar for months, but after the initial annoyance she would catch on and have her new assistant rebook everything. I watch the clock, looking busy, but mostly listening for any sign of what is going on around the office. I haven't heard much.

I get myself a small coffee, out of boredom as much as anything else. How many ways can I screw her over? Looking at the coffee pot I briefly consider it again. Since I am gaslighting her until I get a better idea, could I dose it with something? Those miraculin tablets that make flavors weird? ...Okay, Warren, that is just fucking stupid. Something waaay bigger. Poison? Ah... no, that is going too far, and too risky, AND other employees are more likely to drink it than she is. A hallucinogenic? That could be something. On a normal day, I think she could figure out it was the coffee. If there was something else going on, like a company catered meeting, or a birthday party, or something involving taste testing multiple things at once would add enough noise to make it harder to trace back to me. If she had to give a presentation while dosed... that could be bad...in a good way.

A couple minutes before the meeting is scheduled to start, I hear fresh activity through her door. I feel another wave of giddiness and try to compose myself.

The door opens. Victoria emerges, a laptop bag slung over her shoulder and a folder in her hand. {if victoria_birthday = true}She heads to the conference room and once there, lets herself in.{else}She heads in the opposite direction of the actual meeting, toward conference room B. Her office door is left open a crack. An idea strikes me. Her office will be accessible during the whole presentation. I quickly pull up today's schedule on my computer again, and revert it back to say conference room A and print it again. As the printer hums, I look up to watch Victoria's head floating past cubical clusters, zig-zagging to the far wall. She will be there in less than ten seconds...

I grab the fresh printout, then let myself into the office, not quite closing the door behind me. There, on her desk, sits the printout I gave her this morning. I switch them and head to the door... just as I am pulling it open, I notice the sheet in my hand has some pen marks on it, probably from warming up a ballpoint pen. I peek out the cracked doorway and see she is about to open the far door. I hesitate for a half-second, then rush back to the desk, grabbing one of the pens off her desk and mimic the scribble. I'm taking a stupid risk, but dammit, the payoff is going to be better if she doesn’t suspect anything. I spring back to the door and slide through.

Victoria is exiting the wrong conference room with what I can only imagine is a look of profound anger. She turns to look at me from across the wide gulf and starts in my direction. I quickly pick up the coffee pot like I was in the process of making a fresh pot, then I crane my neck like I just noticed she was looking my way. I make a very helpful and exaggerated point-point-point motion toward the other conference room. She veers that way, posture leaning forward. That is her warpath walk.

I try to steal some glances her way while making an act of using the coffee supplies. A few employees notice her body language and discreetly scatter from her path.

Fuck this feels great. I grin to myself.{endif}