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Chapter 1750
by
Fiftyfiftyfifty
What do you do?
Take a load off.
There's an empty table not far from where the squeakin is playing.
When you pop the cork from the wine bottle, it not only fizzes, but foam rolls from the tip down to your fingers on the neck. You give it a taste off your knuckles, and as expected, it's just like a fancy champagne. The flavour is rich and potent with a mixture of more than one fruit, and it's carbonated--a first for you in Absoterra. You didn't expect it, though you aren't surprised given the oddities this world has already shown you. You personally fill each girl's glass, but nobody takes a drink just yet.
You stand and hold your glass between your fingers. "Should I make a toast?" you ask with a grin.
"Of course you should!" Niki calls back.
"As long as it isn't too long," Eva answers. After being given strange looks, she quickly follows up with, "Well, because I'm hungry!"
"I thought perhaps it was still distracting you to be lacking in panties," Amara says with a chuckle and a hand to her lips.
The bunnyfolk's cheeks light up. "I... actually forgot about that... until right now... Wait! You're in the same boat as me."
Snow, with her mask tugged down, smiles up at you.
Xiaoqing has not only removed her cap, but her long-sleeved coat as well. She sits back in her icy blue crop top and shorts. Though after sorting herself out, she raises her glass in your direction, waiting for you to continue.
"A toast it is," you say, pretending to be surprised by the result. "I think in a lot of ways, we're all a little hopeless. But we've been through so much. The feat we accomplished today is no small one. We just act so well as a team, and we've grown so strong, that we were able to make it through a dungeon plenty of other people could not. So we've earned this drink. That's it. The last thing I want for all of you is to be **** to wait another second. Let's order some food as soon as we can, and enjoy this victory!"
After a cheer, everybody drinks from their glasses. All the while, the music shifts to another song, even more relaxing than the one before.
As you laugh and chat with your party, a bar maid eventually wanders on by, and each of you orders something to eat, from stews to ham steaks to vegetables platters to various breads and cheeses.
Unfortunately, while you wait for your food to arrive, the party from before makes their way over.
"What kinda shitty music is this?" the armoured man asks. "Tunes should be upbeat! Booming! I'm gonna fall asleep to this song."
The squeakin overhears his and frowns, but he continues to pluck the strings of his harp.
"I think it is quite nice," Amara says. "Pleasant, and clearly of somebody with--"
"You are my least favourite type of our kin," says their elf. "Thinking you are all elegant and above everybody else."
All three of them flinch back in a brief moment of panic, like when one's survival instinct kicks in upon seeing a face in the dark--the brain making sure a tiger isn't lurking in the bushes, ready to strike. It's because you're already standing. They didn't even notice you move. There's silence for a long moment.
Then finally, the man with the ponytail backs away. "What are we even doing over here? Let's go." With a wave of his hand, the girl follows.
But the dwarf stays behind.
He digs around in his pocket for a moment, and then pulls out a silver coin. It isn't to tip, however. Still wielding his staff, he pulls back his free hand with the coin inside, and throws it with all his might towards the musician on the stage, and by how it seems, the projectile is going straight for his head.
You inhale sharply. Without hardly thinking first, you throw out your right hand to catch the sting of the coin against your palm.
Music stops. The dwarven man stares at you in shock and awe, but especially frustration. His thick brows furl. "Who do you think you--" But he freezes. Slowly, he turns to the towering shadow of another man right behind him. After a moment, he realizes it's the elderly bartender, though he doesn't seem his age in this moment of dread.
G grabs him by his ass and the back of his hair and heaves him up with ease. Then after walking him to the front door, he gives one swing before bum rushing him out into the street. He dusts off his hands, and then walks slowly back to his post.
"One moment," you say.
You then walk to the stage, which isn't far, and place the coin into the squeakin's instrument case.
He looks to you with puppy-dog eyes (mousey-mouse eyes?), but you make your way back to your party.
"Ah! So that's why people don't fuck around," says Niki. "Guess that guy found out."
"Hope that didn't ruin the vibe," you say.
"Are you kidding me?" Eva responds. "You're so cool, Kyle. As expected from the leader behind the future queen of sorceresses, Eva Beela."
Two maids approach the table, one an older man, while the other is the same one you briefly spoke with up front. They place steaming hot and crisp cold plates of delicious foods across the table, as well as water, or whatever other drinks you and the girls request.
What do you do?
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A New World! Your Party of Hopeless Hotties
(Game) After being transported to a fantasy land, you try to assemble a normal party of girls, but things are never that simple.
Click "Start Game"! You've been mysteriously brought over to an RPG-style world of sexy elves and powerful magic, but things aren't as easy as you first imagined. The only adventurers that you're able to recruit into your party are cute girls that are entirely hopeless, and kinky as hell! Hopefully you don't die because of them. (This story was inspired by Konosuba. Cover is from Sakura Knight. Also known as YPoHH.) ----- We have a wiki now! Too many characters to keep track of in this setting? Check out the constantly under-construction reference site here: https://www.worldanvil.com/w/absoterra-fiftyfiftyfifty
Updated on Jun 25, 2026
by Fiftyfiftyfifty
Created on Apr 4, 2020
by Fiftyfiftyfifty
You can customize this story. Simply enter the following details about the main characters.
With every decision at the end of a chapter your game state can change. Here are your current variables.
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