Greeting the Guests

Tyalangan

Tyalangan stands on the top of the hill which oversees the park that dominates the space in front of the Copse-Wood Castle. The orgy in the free-sex area of the park has only a few dozen people in it at the moment, but the sea elf doesn’t pay it any mind. A nice flat rock, repeatedly scorched with **** heat from her oread-wife, feels warm in the morning sun. A carob tree provides a little shade. Her subjects give her space. It is rare for the Queen to leave her castle. Rarer still for her to be alone. But, today she is not acting as a Queen, but a Host, and she is having special guests.

The portal opens and three individuals walk through it, one clothed, two nude. Tyalangan focuses first on the demon, the potential threat. Her skin crimson, her eyes ablaze, her proportions cartoonish.

The nude man, human, young, physically fit in a professional athlete kind of way, but carries himself as if his muscles were unearned. That sentiment is a bit unfair; he earned them, just not in the traditional way. Tyalangan gives his flaccid genitals the briefest of glances, more out of need to measure the demon’s craftswomanship than anything else. He squints as if he hasn’t seen the sun in weeks.

The clothed woman, human, slightly older than the male, has the body of a porn caricature of a girl next door. The sea elf is not the biggest fan of the typical eventual body type of most Harem Hotel contestants. Cammy’s form is at least relatively tasteful (compared to say, Kei). She wears a simple sun dress, white with pale yellow flowers, a pair of sturdy sandals, secured with straps at her ankles, a floppy straw hat, and a pair of sunglasses. While an outfit like that would be ridiculous in the bunker, here, with sun and coastal breezes, it suits her. Slightly prudish, by this world’s standards, but still suits her.

Tyalangan grips the pommel of her sword a little more tightly. She knows the rules. Outside of petty passive-aggressive acts, Hosts are supposed to be civil. She pushed the line with Ora. Will this demon do the same? Or, worse, go past it? She takes her role seriously. She’d rather not pick a fight, especially if that means she can’t help those kids.

When the humans finish adjusting to the new environment, Tyalangan puts on her game face, “Greetings, travelers, and welcome to Nimlith Grove. I am your humble Host, Tyalangan. I heard that you wished for some respite from your bunker and am glad to oblige.”

The male, Felix, speaks first, stammering more towards the demon than to her, “Is this real? Not a trick?”

“No trick,” Tyalangan interjects, “You have the whole day to explore, outside of some pre-scheduled events.”

Felix takes in the scene with new eyes. The sunshine, the breeze, the tree, the grass, the distant orgy. He blushes, pointing towards the pile of humping rabbit folk, “Are you sure? That can’t be real.”

“I have lived here long enough. This is a real world; a porn logic world, but a real one.”

Cammy whispers in Felix’s ear with a teasing tone, just loud enough for the sea elf to hear, “We are going to have so much fun here today.”

Felix twitches down there, probably despite himself. He looks to be a “shower.”

“Some rules to consider as you go about your date. One, public nudity is quite common here, as are most consensual public sex acts between adults. Try to keep anal sex at a minimum in public, as fecal matter getting everywhere is still a public health concern.”

Both the humans blush a little at that, which surprises Tyalangan. She figured that Cammy would at least keep it together better than that.

Felix gestures towards his nudity, “So, people will just leave me alone being like this?”

“No one will be bothering you for being naked. They will be bothering you for being on Harem Hotel. Granted, your season is broadcast here after the more family friendly seasons, so you’ll be less recognized than if, say, Nick and Mary came over for a date, but be prepared for being treated as a celebrity. You brought some markers to autograph things, right?”

Felix looks shocked. Cammy smirks as she pulls a couple of Sharpies from her handbag.

“Speaking of being treated like celebrities in a porn logic world, be careful about people approaching you for sex. Humans are basically Dittos from Pokemon here. Unless you want to father some kids in a world beyond your own or get knocked up with a litter of animal-children, you should decline. I do have a law on the books that requires explicit written permission from the Master for a citizen here to have sex with a Harem Hotel contestant, but laws are never perfectly followed. I will keep an invisible eye on the two of you, just in case.”

“Oh, they won’t be touching Felix,” Cammy declares, “He’s mine.”

Tyalangan points as she concludes, “Finally, Cammy, your first stop is down the hill over there. They are expecting you shortly. You can save your coupon. Your season is picking up the tab for today. Enjoy yourselves, kids!”

As the humans amble towards the path, Tyalangan turns to the demon. She puts on as big a smile as she can manage. “It’s a little early for it, but I have refreshments in my office, if you wish to watch them in relative comfort.”

Her hand stays on the pommel of her sword as she escorts the demon to her office. Time to have tea with a demon. Who said Hosting would be dull?

The Show-Runner

Quick edit for directions now that the links are properly built in! So, Felix and Cammy from AEBE300’s Bunkered Together season are having a little vacation from the titular bunker. The Local Gang link lets you continue on my branch and the other link will let you follow their date. If you’d like to guess at the date contents, very subtle hints have been placed in my branch (which staff members are doing things to help with it) so speculate in the comments, if you’d like.

Oh, and, due to the very delayed nature of last week’s bonus publication, both this chapter and the subsequent Local Gang chapter are still eligible for the comments audience bounty until the next publication push date (somewhere around 17 Apr).