Jungle Cruise

Another turtleshell cracked onder his fist. DK hadn’t planned on doing some housework today, but cleaning the jungle of these intruders was, admittedly, a whole lot of fun. He punched a goomba so hard it flew up and out of sight. All the while he was running to catch up to the hovering carrier that stole his treasure. It zoomed across the jungle like a bee, winding through the trees, firing bullets at him. Luckily, good old Diddy Kong was there to shoot them out of the sky. What the guy missed in size, he made up for in craftiness. DK was the wrecking ball, DD was the toolkit.

Despite their different approach, they were after the same thing. DD blasted on, using his backpack to fly alongside his buddy, firing his peanut guns as DK crashed and smashed through the koopa army. The koopas tried, but they couldn’t stop, much less slow down the combined **** of the kongs.

Eventually, they reached the carrier. With a huge clap, DK knocked out the driver, causing the carrier to swerve.

“Let me!” DD interrupted, grabbing hold of the stick. “You keep those turtles off our tail.”

DK nodded, made sure the booty was secured, and moved to the back of the carrier.

“Incoming!”

Paratroopas descended on them like locusts. DK punched left and right, launching them into the trees or forward in front of the carrier, so DD could run them over.

“How many of these things can they send after us?” DD shouted, veering close to a thick tree trunk to crush a koopa hanging of the side.

“You getting tired already, bud?” DK roared back, as he ripped the wings of a red shell.

“Not a chance, just worried we’ll run out of power before they run out of bodies.”

“So why do you think they did this?”

“You seriously asking, knucklehead? To get our attention! They knew we weren’t gonna let go.”

“Guess so,” DK swung his arm and knocked the last koopa into the stratosphere with his signature move.

“How’s it going back there?” DD asked.

“I think that was the last of ‘em,” he responded. “Best get outta here, find someplace safe.”

“You thinking what I’m thinking?”

DK chuckled. “I can already taste it.”

And taste it he did. As soon as they entered the treehouse, he threw the booty on the bed. He didn’t bother removing the ropes, he suspected she preferred being tied up anyway. His assumption was confirmed when she let out a relieved sigh as he pushed her legs up so her knees reached her starry earrings — the only things he still let her wear — and stuck his tongue deep inside her.

DD was sure to enjoy his own little treasure, the shapeshifting star-creature, probably in the form of a anthropomorphic bunny. Whatever floats your boat, DK supposed. He had better things to think about. For instance, whether he’d fuck his girl immediately after making her cum, or if he’d have her on her knees and shove his cock down her lovely throat.

“Want me to fuck you, princess?”

“Yes, please D,” she managed to gasp as he shoved two of his big fingers inside her.

“Want me to shove my dick inside you?”

“Yes D, please just—“ she came, shaking legs and all. “Please fuck me.”

He didn’t keep the lady waiting. He grabbed her tiny waist with both hands, and drove her down onto him. Her moans were incredible. He stared at her ecstatic expression for a moment, her little mouth open, long bangs ruffled yet still covering one of her icy blue eyes.

Then, he heard the clapping. It wasn’t him, not even DD and his bunny girl. It was the dark, monstrous figure neither of them had noticed in their excitement. The figure who now raised a large, glowing weapon.

“That’s quite the show, ape. Too bad I have to close the curtain.”

Before he knew it, DD had jumped in between them, pulling both his guns, but DK’s instinct took over. With a punch to the floorboard he was now glad he hadn’t fixed yet, he created a hole large enough for DD to fall through. He knew the river underneath his treehouse would drag him far away, far enough to be safe from the weapon that now fired straight into him. He saw Rosalina and the Luma gasp in horror as he himself fell into a deep slumber.