Skamps ( where singles meet)

So this is Skamps in Dublin Ohio on Halloween night. It's packed to the rafters with people in various costumes. The disco music is pounding over the club's PA system and the illuminated dance floor is full. I think my first order of business should be to sit at the bar and order a drink and scope out my prospects.

One of the bartenders, a bored redhead dressed as Sheena Queen of the jungle asks for my drink order. "I'll have a Kentucky Mule." She immediately perks up.

" I haven't made one of those in quite awhile, one Kentucky Mule coming right up." It takes her a few moments to find a copper mug to serve it in then I watch as she expertly mixes it. She brings it to me and sets it down on the bar then watches as I take a sip." So how'd I do?" It's a perfect blend of bourbon, ginger beer and lime juice.

"It's fantastic thank you." She smiles and goes off to take care of other customers.

Now to check out my potential victims while I enjoy my drink. There's a guy in a werewolf costume dancing with some chick dressed as Cleopatra. A dude wearing torn up clothes and zombie make up dancing by himself and-- " Excuse me madam allow me to introduce myself. I am Duke Larg from the planet Zoltran." I turn my seat around and there's this little man with green makeup on his face and a spaceman costume on complete with green antennas on his balding head. I stifle a laugh. When I say he's a little guy I don't even think he's even five feet tall. I extend my hand to shake his.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Duke Larg. I'm Vampira. To what do I owe the pleasure of your acquaintance." He gingerly shakes my hand in return.

" I was wondering Lady Vampira if I may have the next dance?"

This is too adorable to pass up, I finish my drink. And stand up." Of course you may have the next dance my Duke but I must warn you I can be a bit rough with a man." His lips form an O shape as he looks down at his crotch and cups his groin in his hands.

"Oh my nether region may be in peril." He looks at my feet in my stiletto sandals. "And such beautiful toes in high heels." Geeze first Herb and now this little fella. I seem to attract guys who like having their balls busted.

"Tis a risk I'm willing to take madame."

"Well then Duke Larg let's dance."