Post-Notes

I had so many questions. Enough that I was tempted to start writing them down. But where did I even start?

I’d thought I had a fairly clear picture of what Cassidy had been dealing with when it came to the App. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure what I had been expecting, asking her to go through everything for me - my fiancee was a smart girl, she wasn’t going to just miss some big piece of info on a hidden page all these years. Something that would say where or who the App came from.

Those three titles, or names, or whatever they were, were the closest we’d get to answers for that particular question. I’d need to do some deep googling to figure that stuff out, if it was figurable at all.

The Relationship stats weren’t all that surprising, though her commentary on some of them was interesting. Her balancing act with my Mom was kinda strange, and the fact that my sister potentially harboured a lady-boner for my fiancee was odd. Not that I could blame Toni for thinking Cassidy was hot, particularly considering the App, but still. Kinda weird to have confirmation like that.

And it was that Confirmation part of things that I needed to wrap my head around, because Cassiy had that with everyone. Or she did if she was actively checking the App, at least.

I don’t know how I would feel, seeing concrete statistics about what someone thought about me. How would I feel if some super hot woman came into the Vaso, flirted with me, and I could just check the App and see that she really did have the hots for me? Hell, what if I had that today with Vera Angeloff and her whole group? What if I could have confirmation that Ada really was open to hooking up, or it was Luna’s kink and actual desire for Vera to give away her sexuality like I’d been offered? Would that change my reaction to them?

Would I have developed the same friendship I did if I had seen where Dayana and I had started, or Vanessa? Would I have made friends with Tommy? How would I see my coworkers if I knew they actually liked me more than I thought they did, or way less?

What if Jonas thought I was his best friend and that we were super close rivals? Would I be just as annoyed with him constantly, or would I treat him less like a case of contagious itchy ass syndrome?

Cassidy had done awful things to me, betraying our trust and love and relationship by letting the App start dictating how she viewed and interacted with other people. But that had been 18-year-old her, and it had time to set its hooks in her. And when she woke up from it all, she’d spiralled. Dropped out of college, dropped almost all of our circle of friends unless she was with me, started a completely different career path, all because she’d realised what the App was doing to her.

It made me a little sick to think about how different I would look at people if I knew too much about them. Wasn’t that one of those tropes about people who could read minds and became super villains? It was tough to view people as inherently good when you were constantly hearing the disgusting or evil things they were thinking. How much different would it have been for Cassidy not thinking of people as sexual objects with the App constantly showing her how horny they were for her in particular? Let alone who was pretending to be her friend versus who actually was, but also that all of that friendship was based off of the App influencing those friendships.

And then there were the perks.

Jesus Christ, the perks.

I was going to need to go through all of those lists again to really wrap my head around them, and figure out how I felt about things. And how I felt about Cassidy not telling me about some of them before now.

All I could really focus on was the big picture at the moment.

And the big picture was… horrifying.

The App could do horrible things to people. It could change who they inherently were - their sexuality, their morals and ethics, how they interacted with the world around them. The suggestions the App made for Heather were…

Cass was right, the App was confusing, but it also felt weirdly sentient. Like it was tempting her in places. Heather had treated Cattie like an object more than a girlfriend, and now it was suggesting ways to punish her for it in ways that could almost be considered ironic. It was aware in ways that we couldn’t understand, or at least not yet.

And if Cass wasn’t who she was, if we weren’t who we are, she could have made our whole problem just get swept under the rug. She could have made me OK with her sleeping around, seemingly in multiple ways. She could have given herself an easy out back then, or recently, and done whatever she wanted. But she didn’t.

My fiancee picked the hard path because it was the right one.

I’d finished eating my dinner while reading and had pushed the dishes out of the way while I’d become engrossed in the notes. Now I reached for my phone that I’d also set aside, thumbing it open. It was still weird not to have a bunch of messages coming in from the girls. There was one from Becca, another short update that Wanda was still safe, and still talking with Brodi, with Becca hanging out nearby. Cassidy had landed safely, and she sent me one quick selfie of her and Terra pressed cheek to cheek and smiling into her phone camera - both of them wearing backwards ball caps and looking cute as hell.

I liked the selfie, then typed what I’d intended to. ‘I love you, Cassidy.’

She was typing back almost immediately, a fast ‘??? thank you, Tiger, but you ok? We R driving to Terra’s from airport.’

‘Read through the notes. Lots to process, we’ll talk when you’re back. Just needed to tell you I love you.’

‘I love you SO MUCH,’ she replied.

‘Tell Terra I miss her and love her, too. Be safe.’

She sent a quick thumbs up, then a few seconds later typed. ‘Terra says you’re breaking the Therapy rules, so she only kinda loves you back :P’

I snorted and shook my head, flipping my phone back over and sighing as I looked at the notes again.

Three relationships had ended on that trip, and I’d already been feeling the weight of that on my shoulders even knowing about the App. The fact that all three had been fracturing in different ways already, whether they’d known it or not, only helped a bit.

Based on Cassidy’s list of purchased Perks, she’d helped those fractures grow even if she hadn’t gotten one of the egregious ones. That Wingman one would have been working overtime in my favour alongside the Perks she’d put on me. But how much, at the end of the day, did I blame myself, Cass, or the App for those relationships imploding?

Heather slowly turning into the spawn of Satan hadn’t been the App’s fault.

Wanda’s husband having kept his fetishes and kinks secret from her for years hadn’t been the App’s fault, and neither had his reactions to her being open and honest about her exploring their open relationship deal.

Terra’s frustrations with JC had been simmering under the surface of their relationship for a while, and Cass and I hadn’t manipulated the way he acted and reacted with her earlier in the trip.

So how much did either of us own on that, really? Or the App?

Did we influence them, or just make it clear the door was open for them to get out and that we were waiting on the other side with open arms to catch them?

My phone buzzed, and I smiled a little as I turned it back over, expecting a new message or picture from Cass, but instead was a picture from someone else. A number I didn’t have saved in my phone, and didn’t have any messages from.

And it was a picture of the sweetest pussy I’d ever eaten - I don’t think I'd ever forget those pretty little pale lips.

‘Your wifey said you were all alone tonight and could use a pick me up :P’ came in seconds later.

I grunted, licking my lips just at the thoughts of Tanya’s sweet taste, and let out my breath before typing. ‘God you look good, Tanya,’ I texted her back. ‘And I think you definitely picked up one specific part of me :P Standing ovation.’

She sent me back a crying laughing emoji, then another media message started to load. A moment later it showed a little two second GIF of Tanya, all done up for a night at work at the Strip Club, in her truck. She blew a kiss to me and then winked as she laughed.

I shook my head again, scrolling up and taking one last look at the picture.

Tonight was going to be weird. For the first time in well over a week I wouldn’t have two ladies in bed next to me. Let alone the fact that I wouldn’t have Cass next to me - we’d spent nights apart before so it wasn’t like this was the first time, but after falling asleep in the arms of two or more women I cared deeply about over and over, the bed was going to be lonely. And I was going to be horny.

This was the longest I’d gone without some form of sexual release in a while.

I was going to be jerking off tonight for sure, and I had to laugh a little because all my girls, and Tanya and even Madison, the local Page chick with the amazing ass, had made sure I’d have plenty of inspiration. Porn websites? Never again.

When my phone buzzed again, I wondered if Cass had spread the word and I was going to get a flurry of even more pictures, but when I checked again I broke into a different kind of smile.

‘Ready to get your ass beat over and over and OVER!?’ Leia texted me.

‘Only if you’re ready to face the music in some Mario Kart XD,’ I texted back, then got up and cleared my dishes into the sink to take care of later.

Some video games to take my mind off of everything were definitely in order.

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