They Did The Funny Number

Jen had quickly removed her dress and underwear, eager to start the festivities. Matt was eager too, and was removing his own clothes, until he remembered that he could make them disappear into his inventory.

His body lit up, or at least his clothes did, and then they were gone. The light made him look over to the sleeping Paimon to make sure she didn’t wake up from that. But she hadn’t. Another light show happened after Jen realized she could do the same, and now she was naked too.

{Damn, that's incredibly convenient. Especially for sexy time.}

Matt looked at her now naked form, and his mouth salivated. That was his wife, but she also looked so much like Lumine. Even when she was naked. Sure, this Lumine had a larger set of boobs, but she was so Lumine right now that this moment felt like watching a porn animation with her character made by one of the greatest NSFW animators out there.

Jen sat back on her heels and posed for his viewing pleasure, absolutely preening under his horny gaze.

{You don’t look too bad yourself there, Aether.} Her thoughts told him as she eyed him up.

Matt couldn’t help but grin as her eyes roamed over his body. His new body. From his perspective, his body had gone through some big changes. Less body hair, shorter height, tighter muscle mass, and a different head of hair. So, it must have been like having an entirely new man for her.

{No. No, there’s still bits of the old you in there.} She leaned forward and touched his face. The look in her eyes was warm. Full of love. {Your face still has the Matt I love. Here...} She touched a portion, then another, {And here...} Then she placed two fingers on his lips, caressing him with a ticklish feeling. {And here.}

She had gotten closer, her eyes looking deeply into him, and he could feel all her feelings being sent to him through the bond.

He believed her.

There could be no deception between them now. If there ever was. But now, there was no doubt.

She kissed him. There in the moonlight from the nearby window casting her profile in a beautiful eerie glow. Matt closed his eyes and kissed her back. The distant sounds of the activity from the inn common room could be heard as people drank, ate, and talked. A bard played some tune, a backdrop to their moment.

Jen pushed on his shoulders and Matt leaned back onto the bed. With his head now on the pillows Jen crawled on top of him, their nude bodies sliding together, causing more heat to well up from their loins.

Jen attacked his lips and dipped her tongue in. He fought back with his own and held her tight with his arms. His hands caressed her back and stroked her hair. They made out for a timeless moment to the sounds of a bard's distant harp.

Paimon’s snoring was barely more than a whisper and the creaking of wood, and the scrape of chairs were the occasional white noise.

Matt let his hands roam down to Jen’s butt cheeks, one hand for each. He squeezed and felt her firm, yet supple muscles twitch in his hands. He felt her giggle against his lips and wiggle her body on his. The friction rubbed on his hardening cock until it slid in between her thighs. She realized where it was and opened her thighs and closed them again to capture him.

Now, he was right where she could hump and give him a thigh job. Tightly squeezed up against her pussy. She smirked against his lips as she brought her hips up and down, making his manhood slide against the slick folds of her womanhood.

She was slow at first. She made sure not to let him inside her. They had experience with pulling out in time or using other contraception so they could give her creampies, but with none of that available right now, they needed to be careful.

So, she went agonizingly slow. Her juices got him all wet and slick with her love. Her soft sighs and moans mixed with his own, even as their combined saliva dripped from between their mouths.

Sometime later, Jen pulled away from his face to whisper, “Mister, are you ready to have your soul sucked out of you?”

“As long as I can take yours from this end, too.” He whispered back while humping between her legs.

“Mhmmm...” She moaned at the friction. Then she looked down at him with such moist heat in her eyes it made his heart thump in his ears. “My soul is already yours.”

He stared into her eyes for a time until he couldn’t take it anymore. He needed to show her exactly how he felt about her. So, he shifted his body down the bed to give her a better position to sit on his face. Jen sat back and waited until he lay down again. She leaned down to kiss him again before straightening and swung a leg over his head.

It was mostly dark, so he had trouble seeing her pussy, but he had a feeling that she would be as pretty as she was in their past life. Or even prettier, since the goddess of this world liked to make some changes. She had done that with his dick, so it stood to reason that she would do the same here.

{You’ll find that I’m quite hairless now. Completely smooth.}

That... Matt liked that. He was a fan of clean-shaven pussies. Hair was just not something he liked much in a woman. Was that maybe a shallow thing for him to have a preference over, sure. But he couldn’t deny what he liked.

{And, you are also hairless here.}

Her hand and fingers brushed against his balls and shaft. Making him shiver a little.

That... that was another thing he sort of noticed. Over the course of the last couple days, when he would relieve himself on their journey, he found his own genitals devoid of hair. That had been a nice little discovery. It meant less self-grooming and less mess for Jen to deal with when she went down on him.

{Yeah, your pubes sometimes tickled my nose.} She thought with amusement.

She leaned down and licked his hard dick. It was lying across his abdomen, the tip laying on his belly button. Her tongue slid down, down, until it reached his balls, and she kept going. Her tongue wiggled over his sack. Then she went back to the tip and licked over him again.

{There’s even a slight change to the way you taste. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s... There’s less of a tang, maybe? Not that you were bad before. It’s just more... pleasant?}

[Less like a place that barely ever sees the light of day and gets sweaty all the time in a confined space?]

{Yeah! That!}

And she licked some more, licking another side of his dick.

[Lean down some more so I can get a taste of you.] He told her. She had still been on her knees up to now.

{Yes, Sir.}

Matt snorted.

She lowered herself down, her body now mostly laying on him. She lifted his dick from its resting position and instead laid across her face. Her groin was now much closer, and he pulled her the rest of the way, pressing her moist lips to his own.

“Ah... yeah...” Her voice leaked out at the sensation of contact with his mouth.

He grinned at the cute voice and grabbed her butt cheeks, pressing her harder against him.

“Hmmm,” She moaned with a shudder. She responded by licking him harder. She had one hand around his shaft and a hand caressing his balls. Her tongue lavished her love on him.

Matt now got serious and began licking her. His tongue reached out and touched her smooth, yet slick lips. His eyes went a little wide at the taste.

[Oh, wow.]

{What? What happened?} She paused what she was doing.

[You taste... good. Like... I can’t think what to compare it to, but it tastes really good.] He thought with a few more licks.

{Oh. Then I’ve been changed just like you, because your cum tasted really good that time in the mountains too.} As she thought that, she popped the tip of his dick in her mouth, swirling her tongue around and around.

Oh, this might be bad. He might get addicted. The taste was unlike anything he had ever tasted before, except for the taste of Jen herself. There was a strong hint of her there, but all the good parts were amplified, mixed with something he couldn’t quite place. Was it perhaps the taste Lumine herself would have tasted like?

{Ooh, that’s an interesting theory. Then that would mean that all the good things about your cum was amplified and mixed with what Aether might have tasted like.}

Okay, that was a little less nice of a thought to think about. Matt wasn’t sure how to feel about Jen tasting another man. But then he felt stupid about thinking that. He’d be a hypocrite, and besides, he was Aether right now, and his wife was blowing him, not someone else.

He felt her amusement at his line of thinking, both in the bond and with the gusts of air from her nose as she quietly laughed with his dick in her mouth.

{Oh, that’s right. I married a slightly jealous straight man. Good thing I’m a loyal woman that likes sharing him with other women.}

The irony wasn’t lost on him, and he chuckled against her vagina. The breaths of air made her jolt and shiver.

Now, it was time to not think or get distracted. It was time to remind his wife why she liked being with him. He felt her mentally roll her eyes at him as he clutched her butt cheeks and got to work.

“...oh, aah...” She moaned and sighed as he licked her right across her entrance.

Another amazing thing about this bond of theirs was that he could feel how it made her feel. He could feel it as if he were a passenger in her mind. The sensations may not have been his, but he could tell what she was feeling, and he could immediately see how he could use this to his advantage. He tested it further by licking her clit and feeling not just her jolt and hear her moan, but the sensations in her head too. He knew just how it affected her.

So, not only was his own pleasure wracking through his mind, but her pleasure was also whispering through him. He chased that feedback loop and stuck his tongue into her hole. The gasp in her voice echoed in his mind. She felt emboldened and began sucking him harder too.

In the dark bedroom of the inn, lit only by the light of the moon, the soft strains of a harp drifted up from the common room below, mingling with muffled laughter and the clink of tankards. Matt and Jen lay entwined on their bed, the air thick with the scent of their shared arousal. Arousal that was dripping on his face as he ate her out.

Paimon slumbered peacefully on the other side of the room, her breathing steady and oblivious.

The couple's minds buzzed with each other's thoughts and feelings, amplifying every sensation.

Jen straddled Matt's face, her thighs framing his head as she pressed her slick folds to his eager mouth. At the same time, she went deeper on him, her breath hot against his cock, taking him close to the root. He could feel his dick sliding against the back of her throat.

[God, you taste like heaven.] Matt's thought echoed in her mind, his tongue flicking out to trace her swollen clit. She moaned softly around him, the vibration sending jolts through his body.

He lapped at her greedily, his lips sealing over her entrance to suck her juices, a sweet juice that was quickly becoming his favorite thing, swallowing it all down as she ground against his face. Matt could see Jen's vision blurring with his perspective as she felt the pleasure.

{More, baby, more.} She thought back, her hands gripping his thighs while she bobbed her head, tongue swirling around his shaft, hollowing her cheeks to draw him deeper.

The pleasure built swiftly, their shared senses doubling the intensity. Matt's hips bucked involuntarily as Jen's expert sucking pulled him toward the edge. He retaliated by slipping two fingers into her dripping pussy, curling them to hit that spot while his mouth worked her clit relentlessly.

{I'm gonna cum!} Her thought screamed in his head, and seconds later, she shattered, her body convulsing as waves of ecstasy crashed through her. Hot fluids gushed over his tongue; he drank her in eagerly, not spilling a drop. {...oh, wow... that happened so quickly.}

Yeah. Usually, it would take a little longer to get her to cum. Either he was better here in this world because of the bond telling him exactly where her good spots were, or she felt pleasure easier here than in their old world. Either way, it seemed like good news to Matt.

He loved making her cum.

Not breaking rhythm, Jen redoubled her efforts, her throat relaxing to take him fully. Matt groaned into her, the sound muffled by her flesh.

{Your turn.} She projected, and with a few passionate sucks that went all the way to the base, he felt his groin explode, throbbing as thick ropes of cum flooded her throat. She swallowed hungrily, trying to milk every last pulse, but then he felt her sense of pleasure hit her again.

She convulsed and shook. A keen whine escaped her mouth, muffled by his cock deep in her. She was cumming again. Her pussy clamping down on his tongue and sending another spurt of her female juice onto his face. He tried to drink it all, but he was caught off guard.

{...ooh, what... holy shit... hmm, what happened?} Her head was fuzzy, her words sounding just as exhausted as she might have sounded if she had talked.

[Did you cum again?] Matt asked.

It was that moment that they both remembered what the goddess had said.

Any time Matt ejaculated inside a woman, she would cum. Just from that.

{Wow. That... was so sudden. And it felt so damn good.} Jen thought as she lifted her mouth up and kept the tip of his dick against her tongue. A little bit of his seed must have been leaking and touching her tongue, but she didn’t cum again from that. {Huh. Must be when you actually cum.}

She cleaned his tip and swallowed.

They didn't stop. How could they? He could feel Jen’s hunger for more of that feeling, so he went back to licking her.

Jen grew more intense and ground harder against his face, her thoughts a whirlwind of {Again, don't stop licking.} Matt obliged, his tongue delving deep, alternating between broad strokes and rapid flicks. She teased his balls with one hand while sucking him back to hardness, her lips slick with saliva and remnants of his release.

Using all the skills at his disposal, and he had quite a few from their time enjoying threesomes and foursomes, plus with his bond with her to find those more pleasurable spots, he was able to bring her close to climax again. She too brought all her skills to bare to try and bring him off. And with her newfound power to deepthroat him with no discomfort, the wild abandon and passionate back and forth helped boil his balls and churn his next load.

He thinks they came at the same time, her walls clenching around his probing fingers, juices flowing freely for him to lap up, as his cock spilled more of his cum into her mouth. She gulped it down, moaning in satisfaction, their minds echoing mutual bliss, though hers was really intense.

Then again, his orgasm might have gotten there first and set her off.

{AaAaaaaAAaaah, my heaaaad’s....loopy. Getting looopy.} Jen’s thoughts were a step away from sounding unintelligible.

[Is it bad? Should we stop?} He asked out of concern.

{Fuck no. Not yet. Gimme one more.}

Well, all right then. If she thinks she can take one more.

Panting, they pressed on, bodies slick with sweat. Matt's chin was slick with her essence, and Jen's chin was slick with some of his, but mostly wet with her own saliva.

[Just one more then.] He thought, flipping her clit with renewed vigor. She deep throated him, with no gagging at all, just a lovely sound coming from her throat, her thoughts urging him on.

She fucked him with her throat and held him deep, swallowing and tickling his balls. He held her clit between his teeth as he fingered her with three digits. He nibbled and flicked the clit with his tongue. His fingers were not gentle in her hole either.

The third climax built like a storm. Jen's thighs quivered, her release squirting over his face in a gush he swallowed greedily. Matt followed, his cum erupting in hot spurts that she drank down, her throat working to take it all. Her body twitched and convulsed some more, her orgasm seemed to go on for a longer while.

Her head was full of incomprehensible mutterings, and her voice leaked out her moans. Matt hoped that Paimon didn’t wake up because of it.

After some time, Jen seemed to come down from her chaotic orgasm. She was spent and was laying across his body in a daze. His dick had softened and fell out of her mouth, forgotten as her brain tried to recover.

He was spent too. His balls ached a little, and his mind had a fog that made thinking an ordeal.

[I think it’s time for bed then. Unless you can handle another, which I don’t advise. Your head seems like jelly right now.] He told her.

She sent some sort of mental response, but it wasn’t filled with words. More like wordless acknowledgment and exhaustion.

She disentangled from him, limbs heavy and breaths ragged. She slid off him, her body trembling, and sat on her heels next to him. He looked at her face and saw her wet chin and tired face. She slumped there and stared with a growing grin on her lips.

Lord, she looked drunk.

She giggled at that thought.

Matt looked over to Paimon, now that Jen’s thighs weren’t blocking his view. Jen also looked, some of her mind coming back to her.

Matt breathed in relief when Paimon was still snoring softly.

Matt looked back at his wife and their eyes met with a shared, exhausted smile. The harp below played on, this time a different song. Something subtle and calming. There was less noise coming from downstairs in general. The clientele might have finished for the night and gone home or to their rooms.

Matt stretched and yawned, prompting Jen to do the same. Afterwards, when she tried to climb off the bed she paused and held her stomach.

[What is it?] He asked in alarm.

{Er... my stomach is full of your cum. And I can feel it sloshing.} She thought with some sheepishness and bemusement.

Matt made a face and she giggled.

Good thing he had put some bread from downstairs into his inventory. And some water too. He made the loaf appear and handed it to her.

[Here. Something solid for your stomach and to... absorb... all that.]

This time she made a face and he smirked. Then he got the waterbag out and drank some for himself before handing that to her too.

She ate and drank and waited a moment to feel better before finally getting off the bed. He followed, and they pulled back the covers and got in together. With their mouths cleared of... stuff from the water, they were able to cuddle and kiss a little as they settled down.

{That was... incredible. Those orgasms... fuck.} Jen whispered into his mind as she cuddled into his side.

[Your throat was incredible too. I love this whole deep throat thing you can do.] He said to her.

Jen placed a hand on his stomach and rubbed him in pleasant circles. She kissed his pec and snuggled closer.

{It all feels so good for me too. God, I’m going to love when another girl joins. I hope it's Paimon. Since we are going to be traveling together so much. Just imagine every night with you making girls cum just by cumming in them.}

He chuckled and played with her hair.

[I wonder how we’ll convince her. And how we’ll convince other girls. Like Amber.]

{We’ll just have to be really nice and loving to Paimon. Really make her feel like a part of us, while also flirting a little. Show off your manliness and how dependable you are while I hug and play with her. I think we can bed her by the... maybe third night here in Mondstadt.}

[That’s pretty optimistic.] He kissed the top of her head.

{It’s the others that I’m not too sure how to approach though. Amber is cute but will she go for it? Then there's Jean with her sense of duty. And then Lisa... actually, Lisa might be easy.}

[She always was a flirt.]

{Yeah. I was thinking of flirting back heavily with her. You should too.}

[Hmm, we’ll see how it goes. But what about all the others in Mondstadt? How many girls were there again?]

{Let’s see... Amber, Jean, Lisa... then Eula, Noelle, Mona, Fischl... Um... Oh, Barbara, Rosaria and Sucrose.}

[That’s... a lot of women. Are we trying to romance all of them? Or just some, with one-time things with the others?]

{Hmm... I suppose that depends entirely on their personalities and choice. I can see Rosaria only going for a one-time thing. Lisa might also be hesitant to have a relationship. But girls like Noelle and Fischl might actually catch feelings.}

[Yeah, they did seem to be the sweet type and might hope for something more. Then that leads to another question. When we finally move on to Liyue, will anyone want to come with us? Or would we be breaking hearts by leaving?]

Jen was quiet for a time. He might have thought she had fallen asleep, but the bond told him that she was just thinking. Finally, she heaved a sigh.

{I’m not sure what to do about that. I hope at least two would want to come with us, but a lot of them have responsibilities here. I can only see girls like Mona or Fischl having the freedom to leave.}

[An Electro and Hydro type. They’d be good to have with us. And not just for sex.] He finished with a poke to her side. She giggled and playfully bit him. [So, what do you think will happen tomorrow?]

{Hmm... I’m not sure. In the game, we would have met with Jean, gotten a gliding lesson, fought against Stormterror, met with Jean again and then gone off to cleanse those shrine thingies by now.}

[Yeah. Then again, that is a lot to pack into one day. So, I would guess that we will meet Jean and get the gliding lesson and maybe have some free time before an attack from Stormterror, or that attack might happen the next day.]

{Free time to flirt with girls would be nice.}

Matt chuckled. His eyes were having trouble staying open, and he yawned. Jen copied him and he heard her jaw crack a little. Must have been from all that deep throating.

[Time to sleep now.]

{Mhm, ‘kay.}

He kissed her and cuddled her close. The sounds of the bar downstairs were a lot quieter now, and the bard seemed to have packed up his harp for the night. The night outside was still, with the occasional cricket chirp and the drunken mutters of a customer heading home.

In that moment, the married couple really appreciated having a comfortable bed to sleep in tonight. Camping wasn’t so bad, but a bed really helped lull them into sleep quickly. Especially after what they had just done. The drowsiness took the both of them and their night came to an end.

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