Lassus Animus - Part 5

The misty environment made John nervous at first, but through it all, he was able to avoid any further embarrassing incidents. The slowed pace even kept him from having to go all out in order to keep up, so he didn't change the dungeon settings, despite the constant anxiety that having to watch every direction was causing him. While his nerves were frayed by the end, overall, John was pleased with how the midday dungeon shift went.

With the levels he was continuing to accumulate, he pulled his fair share of weight, even with Etriyya and Julianna always eager to push the group to move more quickly. The doubts that Julianna had expressed the other day were assuaged, at least enough for her to keep them to herself this time. Even the injuries John took, frustrating as they were at times, were made far less notable in the presence of such brash allies. With Julianna barreling her way through every obstacle and Etriyya's streak of bad luck continuing, it was easy enough to seem almost untouchable by comparison.

At the end of their allotted time, Julianna departed with little more than a grunt and a dry remark about alerting her of any future delays. They stood in silence as she strode from the room, at which point Moira released a sigh she might well have been holding since the training began.

"I did not realize how irksome it was going to be having her along," Moira growled. "I should have just ordered another of our Knights to join us. Your abilities would've made them formidable, if not as powerful as Julianna…"

"It's not too late to call her off," John suggested.

"As I told you at the start of all this, it is important to avoid offending allies when they are so direly needed," Kim said tiredly. "It is too late for us to merely leave her out of our training, and as much friction as she causes, it is worth it if it means the difference between having her join our efforts or leave to head south once more."

"And here I thought you liked her," John teased.

"I appreciate her enthusiasm for training. But our group now contains entirely too much headstrong energy for its own good..." John was surprised when Kim's gaze turned away from him, falling instead to Etriyya as she spoke.

The knight in question was seated at the edge of the room, being tended to by two of the Order's healers that had not yet exhausted themselves. During their last dungeon, Etriyya had single-handedly seared a dozen or so of the stitched-together masses of muscle, only for the mini-boss to erupt from the very space she stood. It hadn't even seemed aware of her presence, yet its body—composed of long, sinewy strands of woven muscle tissue covered in spikes of bone—had sliced every bit of exposed flesh and slipped its way between the plates of her armor, shredding large patches of **** skin.

"John was already more than I prefer to allow," Moira growled. "As if this training regimen itself weren't already absurd, we are beset from all sides by those who think it is not enough!"

"Well, things went smoother today, maybe they'll be even better tomorrow," John offered. "Maybe she'll continue to mellow out as we go. Gaia forbid, if I keep improving, she might even become friendly. Speaking of which, I need to get going."

John was already preparing to World Shift when Kim moved like lightning, and her hand secured itself around his wrist. The dangerous look from earlier had long since left her eyes, but the gaze that was leveled at him now was no less intense for it.

"John, much as it pains me to say it, Moira is right," Kim said quietly, her eyes narrowing as she made a point of not turning toward the Warden. "This endeavor is foolish on your part. We should adjust accordingly."

"What?" The word snapped out of John more accusingly than he'd meant it, but he did not apologize, nor did he soften his tone. "Why? Today went great! I told you, I might have gotten a little sloppy with my form, but I'm still fine to keep going."

"I do not know what you consider 'fine', but what I saw of your movements was not up to your standards, let alone mine," Kim warned. John tugged against her grip, but she held onto him with an unyielding intensity, clearly not intending to give him any chance to warp away as he had the day prior.

"Oh, come on. You can't have seen enough to be sure of that; we were in mist so thick I could barely see to the end of my blade!" John retaliated, feeling a pang of irritation that twisted its way into his features. He'd thought that he was avoiding scrutiny in comparison; had the Slayer's eyes really been so focused on him?

"The fact that you did not notice my observations is only further proof that you're not functioning well enough to be fighting barrier monsters of this intensity. Certainly not twenty-four hours a day!"

"I don't know what you think you saw, but I got hurt less than half our group!" John's aggravation seeped into his tone despite his best attempts, and the obvious irritation only made Kim set her jaw all the sterner. "If I'm so out of it that you've been watching me stumble all over the dungeons today, why are you talking to me instead of the ones fucking it up worse than I am? Shouldn't you be talking to Etriyya and Julianna about the risks they're putting themselves in?"

John didn't intend to look away, but his eyes flickered over to the knight in question of their own volition. The timing was just right to let him see the full scowl that crossed her features, and the way she shifted her body away from him, even while being healed. John winced, but refused to walk the remark back, knowing it would only give Kim more room to press him.

"Julianna makes little attempt to avoid all but the worst of the danger, and Etriyya's misfortunes require a wholly separate conversation," Kim growled. "Yet somehow, you consider managing to keep more of your blood in your veins than that low standard a feat that proves you to be capable?"

"I think that what I've done for all of you proves that I'm capable," John said, voice rising nearly to a shout. "I'm only trying to get you to see that I'm not falling apart at the seams like you seem to think!"

"John, you told me that if needed, you would skip a rotation to rest yourself," Moira pointed out, stepping closer to strengthen her words without raising her voice. "I am asking you to honor those words."

"Yes, I said if it was needed," John emphasized. "I did fine today! Better than yesterday, by a mile!"

"You are not yourself." Kim's stare was so piercing that John shivered, feeling as if she'd somehow peeled back his skin and was staring into his very soul. "You are not handling this unending exhaustion well, John. You need to-"

Kim's words were lost in the thunderous cry that erupted from Etriyya, a howl of pain so loud that it drowned out all else in the spacious room. Moira and Kim whipped around in a flash, the cry so unexpected, so primally intense, that their hands instinctively went to their weapons once more. But no foe had arrived unseen; Etriyya was untouched. She had just begun to rise from where she had been seated, only to collapse once more. Two very startled-looking healers were now pressed against the wall, eyes wide and just as aghast as the rest of them.

"What's happened to her?" Moira called out, authoritative tone resounding from the walls as strongly as Etriyya's wail.

"M-my arm," Etriyya groaned, cradling her sword arm. She said something further, but the words weren't bold enough to be noticed above the whines and lamentations escaping the usually proud woman.

"I- I'm not sure what's gone wrong," the healer stammered. "A moment, Warden."

The two healers rushed back to Etriyya's side, their hands glowing with a golden light once more. Etriyya gave a few low groans and whimpers as they poked and prodded at her arm, eyes clenched tightly against what must have been an excruciating pain.

"I'm not entirely sure how," one of the healers finally began, "but her body has healed itself improperly. At least, I can only assume that's what happened."

"Your Order magic did not repair the damage properly?" Kim asked, eyeing Moira. Her tone was as sharp as ever, but her eyes showed no accusation in their scrutiny.

"Our spells might fail if a wound is truly beyond saving, but it should not cause any sort of malformation." Moira's explanation escaped as more of a murmur, her brow furrowed in confusion and concern as she approached Etriyya. "What happened?"

"I... I'm not much for Biomancy, this is a bit tricky, but I think..." The Order medic went silent for a moment, then nodded more firmly when he spoke, "I think some of the tendons in her shoulder might have been healed improperly. I can't be sure, but it seems like the severed ends reconnected incorrectly. It would explain why she's in so much pain. She might have come close to tearing her own arm apart when she jerked away from us just now."

"You said it was just skin deep," Etriyya hissed, glaring at the medic each time his glistening fingers prodded her shoulder.

"I thought it was." The medic sounded genuinely disturbed by his own explanation. "Even if it wasn't, we were using the same spells we always do. This shouldn't happen unless the ends were severed and then somehow aligned again inside the wound. Aligned improperly, at that. But you're going to need a Biomancer to open her shoulder back up—or a surgeon."

"I will take over her healing myself," Moira asserted. She took one step toward the ailing Etriyya before her other thoughts could catch up to her. "John, please, will you just-"

"The stubborn fool is gone," Kim hissed. By the time Moira turned, Kim was already facing the spot John had been, the half of her face the Warden could see curdling with an utter disgust. "I released him when your knight cried out; he saw his opportunity to escape, and took it."

"That unbelievable-" Moira's skin began to flush, the metal of her gauntlets creaking as she stared at the unoccupied tiles. "Healers, take your leave at once!"

"But Knight Etriyya is-"

"Fix her, or leave!"

There wasn't a man or woman in Moira's service brave enough to object to an order in that tone for anything but the Lady herself. The flustered healers escaped the room as quickly as their feet could carry them, leaving the trio of angered women alone for the moment. As soon as the door shut behind them, a Barrier formed over the room, changing nothing about their surroundings except the soundproofing that allowed Moira to lose what little restraint she had left.

"He's going to get himself killed!" Moira screamed, frustration and fury no longer burdened by witnesses. Her whole face flooded with red, righteous indignation bubbling over at last. "I told him that this was a foolish idea from the start of it! He thinks that just because he doesn't have to sleep, he can run himself ragged with no consequences."

"And he is no longer in a mood to listen to reason," Kim agreed, eyes narrow. "We may be required to use **** to restrain him, if we do not wish to gamble on his luck outweighing his stupidity."

"If we try and fail, he might very well refuse to come back," Moira warned. Her rage did not cool, but her voice lowered now, a sense of futility tempering her fiery outrage. "And he won't stop these suicidal expeditions even if he does."

"You think he'd risk the others? Push them harder to take on our share?"

"I think he's reckless enough to try going it alone, rather than 'waste time' with basic care," Moira grumbled. Her hand clenched around the haft of her hammer, a part of her wishing it was John's throat. "In spite of all that, I think I have a way we can reach him."

"It doesn't sound like you're very happy about this idea of yours," Kim pointed out.

"I'm not," Moira grumbled. "But… you might be."

John hadn't waited long after hearing Etriyya's cry. Only long enough to make sure they weren't actually under some kind of attack; as soon as he'd realized that Kim's hand had reflexively reached for her blade, and seen Etriyya grasping her shoulder, he'd hurried to whisk himself away before any more time could be wasted on foolish arguing.

"It doesn't matter if they're right about me or not," John thought furiously to himself. "My abilities keep functioning the same whether I'm off my game or not. We can train, we can fight, we can level up. As long as I don't get myself killed, that's all that matters."

John blinked in a dazed stupor when he felt something tugging at his sleeve. He hadn't even realized what he was feeling until his hand started to jerk toward the disturbance—his fingers locked around Midoriya's forearm, thankfully not with enough **** to seriously hurt his poor son.

"Nyaa, Papa, why you starin' at the wall?" Midoriya asked. His voice was as innocent as ever, but the Neko's eyes kept darting over to where his father had an iron grip.

"Ah, just... lost in thought," John muttered unconvincingly. He had half a thought about playing off his grip by tickling his defenseless son, but his fingers felt almost numb. He simply released Midoriya awkwardly, fingers spasming around the empty air until he recovered himself.

"Papa does that a lot lately," Midoriya murmured. He gave John a final look, and though he seemed unbothered as well as John could tell, he darted off all the same, dashing out of the lounge with his usual speed.

"...Huh. He was the only one here. Wonder if they're keeping the kittens on a tight leash…"

John frowned, unconvinced by his own words. As he was trying to fumble in the dark for other possible explanations, the adults of the house began to file out of their rooms and into the lounge. Not only Aclysia, Maera, and Mithra, but most of the others as well, including Farrah. John's smile did its best to project the easy warmth he felt at seeing Farrah up and about, but... something in it must have come out wrong. Farrah took a moment to stare at John, her lips forming a jagged crease, and then turned, darting back into her room.

"Father. You returned later than usual," Sophia noted, her face difficult to read, something that bothered John, though he wasn't quite sure why. "Is everything all right?"

"We were just... really worked up." John almost chuckled at the understatement. Despite having a distaste for lies, it rang unusually humorous to hear the wordplay aloud. "Plus, I got there a little late. Just making up for lost time, that's all."

"Is that why you left from our home, instead of the training room?"

"Uh... I guess?" John said, shrugging. "Doesn't really matter where I leave here from, does it?"

"No, it does not," Sophia agreed, with a note in her voice John couldn't quite place. When had Sophia become so... good at hiding her emotions? No, that didn't sound right. "Will you be joining us for dinner, Father?"

"Can't. Like you said, I'm already a little late. Have to get going; we're on a tight schedule for training."

"But we're hungry, Myaster," Maera objected, sounding oddly less pitiable than usual as she begged for food.

"That's fine, you're not up for another eight hours, Maera," John said, thrown off-balance by the Neko's plea. "You can go ahead and eat, you're fine."

"Everyone is hungry, John," Orria added, looking up at him with oceans of patience as deep as the blue of her eyes.

"What, all of you?" John's disbelief bordered on ire. He scanned the table; only Sophia met his gaze in return. Her eyes were unusually sharp, but John couldn't tell what had her on edge. That, along with the annoyance of delays, **** a frustrated growl from deep in his throat.

"Why didn't you all eat earlier, then?" John exclaimed, his eyes swiveling the table.

"They were not hungry earlier. It's not their fault that they can't perfectly match a schedule, John." Orria's words were calm, collected. It felt wrong, somehow, and it only made John's anger seem more colossal by comparison. He **** the feelings down by reminding himself that he'd have plenty of things to release his anger on soon enough.

"Fine, that's fine. I'm sorry, you all deserve a meal. As many meals as you want, whatever," John said, rubbing at his temples as he turned for the door. "I'll be in the training area when you finish."

"Perhaps you should eat as well. Does your system not provide you with-"

"Nothing worth wasting time over." John cut Sophia's advice off and was outside before she could speak again, the door clanging shut behind him a few moments later.

The door swung open again when he was halfway to the training hall, and the sound nearly gave him a headache. Irritation grew with each footstep that trailed him—when they were nearly upon him, he whirled, brow furrowed.

"I don't need dinner," John snapped, before he'd even seen who was following him. Orria's smile wavered, but didn't quite vanish as she looked up at him.

"I don't either," Orria whispered, as though she were sharing a secret with him. "But I didn't want to make it sound like everyone else was the problem."

There was a new note in her voice, one he hadn't heard before, but his mind was too busy playing the last few days on repeat to contemplate it for long. Nodding once, John jerked his thumb toward the training building and started walking again.