What is the matter?

Jackie looked at me then at the man on the floor "What's the matter with you two?"

You were too distressed to answer. You looked at the man. He had your face. You found yourself hyperventilating. You looked at your hands again. You had small dainty fingers. you looked down. Your chest was bulging. You bought your hands to your chest and confirmed what you had seen. You had breasts and they were encased in a bra. You felt for your crotch. It was flat. You squealed!

"Carmen! Snap out of it!" Jackie was holding you and shaking your body. She was now taller than you.

Then the man stood up. He was very tall. He towered over even Jackie. You had not realised how tall that body was. He said "I think we have swapped bodies" You watched with disbelief as he felt his crotch. "I've got a dick and balls!"

Jackie let you go and turned to the man "What's with you? What are you doing Gerry?"

He replied "I'm not Gerry. I'm Carmen. I think I and Gerry have swapped bodies"

"Yeah and I'm the tooth fairy!"

"It's true" you squeaked in a very feminine voice "I'm Gerry. He looks like me!"

"This isn't funny guys. it's not April fools day. It's my wedding day. Cut the crap!"

"No Jackie. It's true. We have somehow swapped bodies" the man replied.

"It must have been the orb" you said. "Where is that note? What did it say?" sure enough you sounded like Carmen. There was a mirror in the dressing room. You moved over to it and looked at your reflection. Looking back at you was Carmen, Jackie's best friend. She was wearing a white long-sleeved shirt and blue jeans. Exactly what you were now wearing. Her long brown hair was in a pony tail. You reached behind your neck and found the real thing. "Fuck! I'm Carmen!"

"This isn't funny!" said Jackie.

The man, who you know knew to be the real Carmen, had followed you across to the mirror. You stepped away so he could see his own reflection. "I'm huge!" he said to himself.

"Where's that note Jackie? We have to try to swap back"

"Enough of this joke guys. I'm serious. Gerry get out of here! We girls have to get dressed and you are not allowed to see the wedding dress. I'll see you at the altar"

"We are not joking Jackie. I'm really Carmen. I'm in Gerry's body. Ask me a question only Carmen would know"

"Okay. I'll humour you. If your Carmen then tell me what desert you ate at the Hens night?"

"A chocolate penis and marshmallow balls"

"Hmm. Carmen probably told you. How about, who did Judy dance with and what was he wearing?"

"A drag queen. who looked like Marilyn Munro in a polka-dot dress"

You could see that Jackie still wasn't convinced. She turned to you "Well if you are really Gerry, you can tell me the names of all your aunts and uncles"

You promptly answered not only giving the names of your 5 aunts and 3 uncles but also the names of their spouses.

Jackie was finally convinced. The blood drained from her face. Luckily Carmen stepped across and caught her before she swooned. He helped her to a couch, then turned to you and said "Go and fetch a glass of water for her"

You did exactly that. You left the dressing room and hurried down a hall to the kitchen. Your body wobbled in all the wrong places, but at least your limbs seemed to be working. Your older sister Karen was in the kitchen unpacking the wedding cake. She was a chef and had made the cake herself. She turned as you entered "What was that squealing about? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, all under control" you lied. "I just need to get Jackie a drink" You grabbed a glass and filled it with tap water.

Karen told you "I hope Gerry is leaving. I'm almost done here. The hair dresser and make-up people will be here any minute. Tell him to get out of here"

"Ah. Okay" you replied as you hurried out. You didn't know what else to say

When you returned to the dressing room, Jackie's colour had returned. She told you abruptly "We are going to go ahead with this wedding. Even if I have to marry Carmen. We have spent too much on the venue, guests have come from interstate. We can't cancel"

"We have to cancel" you replied "You need to marry me not Carmen!" You could hear the panic in your new voice.

The male Carmen spoke "She forgot to tell you we are going to try and swap back first"

Jackie qualified "But if you can't swap back we go ahead with the wedding anyway. You and Carmen will just have to swap roles until we can sort this out"

"I can't be a bridesmaid" you said in dismay

"You make a better bridesmaid than I do at the moment" Carmen answered. "I'll just be standing in for you until we can swap back. But hopefully it won't come to that. How about we both hold that broken glass again while Jackie recites the words on that bit of paper"