Understanding insecurities.

“Seriously, he’s really acting weird,” Ruth insisted. She was sitting across from Reina and Anna and next to Nanami. The four were hanging out at Reina’s place since Will, the topic of their conversation, hadn’t come back home yet. “We were together the other day and I started making moves on him. We kissed like usual but then he pulled away, apologizing and saying he had work to do.”

“And DID he have work to do?” Reina asked.

“Well, yeah. He did start writing an assignment, but…” Ruth pouted. “Look, I get Will is busy, but this isn’t about that. I know it. You think… You think he’s getting bored of me?”

“Okay, don’t go there,” Reina said.

“Nanami, smack her, please,” Anna requested.

“Ack!” Ruth exclaimed when Nanami actually smacked her on the back of the head. Though the hit was so light that her cry was purely theatrical.

“It’s not about you, Ruth,” Anna told her. “He’s just… I don’t know. Strange as it is, it’s like he’s not in the mood for sex.”

Nanami sighed. “I think… I think what Johana said really got to him.”

“That thing about not loving himself?” Anna asked. “I can see how it would, but…”

“Will is not so weak that he’d have a breakdown over something like that,” Reina told them. “Besides, why wouldn’t he love himself? He’s handsome, reliable, hardworking, smart…”

Nanami frowned at Reina. “Remember that his powers come from sexual energy, and sex is intrinsically linked to emotions. Basically, his powers and his emotions affect each other. I believe he’s said that Ishtar's influence made him act unlike himself several times before. And on top of it all… He’s been cheated on four times already.”

Ruth let out a mix of a sigh and a groan as she crossed her arms and sank down the seat in frustration. “Yeah… You don’t come out of that without a few insecurities.”

“But he’s over that, isn’t he?” Reina said. “I mean, he has seven women begging for his cock and perfectly willing to share. Who wouldn’t get a huge confidence boost from that?”

Anna gripped hard on her knee and shook her head. “Reina, you’re incredibly gorgeous and a very talented model. I bet you’ve never experienced anxiety, right? You’ve always been 100% sure that your looks and your abilities would get you anything you wanted, right? I bet you’ve always been happy with yourself.”

Reina’s brow twitched. She turned to Anna with a snarl and almost spat, “What? Are you kidding!? Of course I’ve…!”

…Felt anxious. Felt uncertain. Felt ugly. Felt like trash. Felt that, no matter how hard she worked, nothing went her way. She had seen others rise faster than her, seen others achieve so much more than her. Only now was she starting to feel like things were working out for her, that she was finally getting where she wanted to be.

Reina went quiet.

“You know…” Ruth began, her tone quiet, somber, “I’ve been having a lot more success with my dance group stuff, and I’m happy about it, but… It all started when I awakened these powers of my own.” Right. It was practically the same for Reina. Will’s photos came first and then her awakening led to an increase in her popularity. “These powers are making me get more attention than the other members. Sometimes… Sometimes I think it’s unfair, you know? Like… I’m not doing anything different. I’m just…”

“...”

So Will felt like this, too? Reina swallowed. “You’re saying that… How good he is in bed, having us, having magic powers…”

“None of it means squat if you’re not happy with yourself,” Anna said, sighing heavily with arms crossed. “It’s easy to forget, but Will is only 19, Reina.”

Reina’s heart sank. She felt like a fool. Anna was right, after all. Will was driven and proactive, responsible and capable, but he was still only 19. What the fuck what Reina doing at 19 years old? Crying that her younger cousin had a car while she didn’t, having a heartache because the guy she liked was dating someone else, already planning to drop out of university because classes were too hard. She was a brat. Somehow Will didn’t seem like a brat to her, but… he was. And she was expecting him to have everything figured out? When he had the added weight of having an all-powerful sex ghost invading his head?

Reina dragged her hand hard down her face as she groaned. “I’m such a fucking idiot.”

Nanami smiled wryly at her. “To be fair, I don’t think your idea of giving him space was wrong. He’s been avoiding us for a reason. But I also don’t think leaving him alone is the right answer.” She then began to shift uncomfortably. “Um, if you don’t mind me asking this… Why DID you all decide to start dating him?”

“Love at first sight, I guess,” Reina admitted. “We met at a photoshoot in which I knew I’d be having sex with him. He was… charming and easy to be around. Then we had sex and it blew my mind.”

“Same here, I guess,” Ruth said with a faint grimace. “I get all sorts of customers hitting on me at the restaurant, but… I was just drawn to him. He was the right mix of proactive, suggestive and tasteful about it. Then we had sex and it was like I was having my first time again, only this time it was fucking amazing.”

“He’s the only guy I’ve ever been attracted to,” Anna said. “One look and I suddenly found myself questioning my preferences all over again. I guess I wanted to go back to… exploring.”

“...So you all fell for the charms of sexual energy?” Nanami asked them.

“You didn’t?” Ruth asked back.

Nanami shook her head. “I have some manner of resistance against it, so all I saw was a handsome man with a lot of power he wasn’t quite sure how to use. I was mostly wary of him at first, but…” She giggled. “Turns out that, for having sex in his head most of the time, he’s surprisingly innocent and caring.”

“Okay, wait a moment. I get that we became attracted to him mostly because of supernatural stuff, but that’s not the reason we’re still with him.” Reina said. “The sex is amazing, yeah, but I just like him a lot. It’s that simple.”

“Yeah. Wish it would get through his thick head,” Ruth agreed. “Where is he, anyway? I know he’s doing some important stuff, but it’s already 11:30 pm…”

Almost as if on cue, Nanami’s phone rang. She was quick to pick up.

“Auntie? What is it?”

“...”

“Yes, I’m at Reina’s place with Anna and Ruth.”

“...”

“N-No, Will hasn’t come home yet.”

“...”

“W-What do you mean you lost contact with him!?”

The temperature of the room dropped below zero.