Go sit with her

You came here for a reason, one way or another you needed to know things that realistically only she could credibly tell you. It's not like you were flush with other ideas about what to do.

As you walk over to her she notices you and stands up. To your surprise she pulls you into a warm hug and holds you to her bossom for a long pause. You hadn't realized just how much you needed this. It had been a long few days filled with fear, anxiety and hopelessness. All seemed to melt away in her embrace. It had been some time since anyone held you like this. Truthfully you couldn't remember the last time.

After what must have been unusually long and yet far too soon she pulls away and you both take your seats.

Sammy : "so... What was it you wanted to ask me?"

You had thought about this in the hour since you contacted her and had decided on asking a barrage of detailed questions about the SFC process. What was in the pills, what were the precise steps she went through. Was all of this safe? Was there any way out? And maybe you'd get to those topics later. But now that you were here, in the moment, those just felt like details.

Alex : "Are you happy?"

Her face lit up with the most genuine smile you've ever seen.

Sammy : "Yes! Oh god yes."

Alex : "Do you ever regret your decision? Wish that you'd stayed Samuel?"

Her smile turned just a shade sour.

Sammy : "No. I don't miss being Samuel. Some people have nightmares about being back in school. You know the ones, where you forgot a big test you should have studied for so you fail spectacularly and your life is over? You'll spend the rest of your days working a miserable fast food job? I have a similar nightmare but it's that I might have answered a few questions differently on that silly SFC test and scored just a little too high so I would have to live the rest of my life as 'Samuel'."

A darkness seems to have come over her face.

Sammy : "Don't get me wrong, I didn't even know I was miserable back then, I was just numb, going through the paces. I didn't know what it was like to actually be happy... No, I don't miss being Samuel, I haven't a single time..."

She pauses and then the light returns to her eyes.

Sammy : "Sorry, I didn't mean to be so heavy there. Remember when I said I could use a friend like you? It's hard to talk to other people about things like this, I went through all of this mostly alone. I have a few friends but no one who could really relate to this stuff."

Just then the waiter came by and asked for your order, you were a little relieved because you didn't really know how to move the conversation forward after that.