Laura takes a hostage

I stand up and let the girl go as I slowly back away towards Laura, hands raised to avoid showing (any more) hostility, even if by doing they can see the little red bush between my legs. Matter of fact, I see more than one worker pointing at my ladybits and then giving me a rude gesture. I swallow, and nod at Laura to let the other girl go.

“N-no way. If I let her go, they are going to come after us!”

“Laura, there is no scenario where keeping a hostage defuses the situation!”

“But- Ack!” Laura recoils as something hit her forehead. Was it a rock? No, there is no blood, although the impact area looks somewhat green… Oh, it’s a grape. That makes more sense. I look back at the angry mob, many of them reading their projectiles.

“Eeep! Ow!” I yell, barely sidestepping a grape only to be hit by another. Laura also received another hit on her face. She instinctually moves her hand to clean it up, giving her hostage all the opportunity she needed. The woman elbows Laura’s stomach, stomps on her foot and then runs to her coworkers.

The mob of workers is still angry. Without our human shield, they advance, pelting us relentlessly with their crops and yelling more aggressively. “See? Hostages are useful!” Laura recriminates while receiving a violent delivery of a harvest worth of grapes. She now has a thin veneer of juice coloring her skin slightly green. Same as me, I suppose. Looking down to see my normally rosy nipples in an alien shade of color.

“Oww, eep! Time to run away!”I yell, and raise my hands, fruitlessly trying to protect me from the onslaught as we make our escape.

Dashing through the vines is not something I recommend doing, and doing it naked is even worse. The branches and leaves prod at every part of your exposed skin, prickling it as you push forward. At least they don’t have thorns…I guess running across a rose field would be worse, but that’s hardly a silver lining.

The other thing that’s annoying about crossing a vineyard like this is that you can’t see what’s in the next row until you cross it… which can prove to be a problem if the vineyard is atop a steep hill and your feet fail to find ground underneath them when you clear a bush. “AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!”

Both Laura and I tumble down the hill steep hill,. We roll down like a couple of bowling balls, trampling flowers and grass as we continue our dizzying descent into e base of the hill.

We don’t have time to re-orient ourselves. From their vineyard, the amused workers keep throwing grapes at us, grinning, and yelling what I assume are insults. Under such an unrelenting ****, we make a quick retreat further into the countryside before things can get worse.