Evaluating the Freshman 15 in Seminar

“Who wants to go first? Come on, don’t be shy. Yes, Charmaine, take us away,” the professor says, calling on the girl who’s fastest to put her hand up.

“The Freshman 15 was a massive mistake. The movie should never have been made and it certainly should never have caught on as a trend,” she says, a hint of anger coloring her voice. “You want to know why young people are single all the time and can never seem to find a partner, much less get married? It’s this whole nonsense about having casual sex. Nobody can ever settle. There’s always somebody ‘hotter’ around the corner, and that applies to both guys and girls out there. Then you go and add the Freshman 15 to the mix and it all goes downhill from there. The Freshman 15 is modern decadence at its worst.”

“Strong words from Charmaine, we couldn’t have expected anything less from her,” the professor laughs. “Objections, anyone?”

“Charmaine’s dead wrong, and here’s why,” Lucille says, not even waiting to get called on. “Life fucking sucks, pardon my language—” the professor shrugs and smiles, waving her to go on “—it’s clear everyone’s got problems with mental health these days. But here’s how I know that the Freshman 15 isn’t the problem. All those things Charmaine was saying about people being single and people not getting married? Yeah, sure, that’s true, but you know what’s true too? People aren’t having sex anymore. People aren’t getting out there to meet each other. We’re inundated in social media but nobody’s social. So here’s what I say. The Freshman 15 is exactly what we fucking need. People need all the encouragement they can get in this day and age to get busy with each other, and the problem isn’t that we’re having too much sex, it’s that we’re having way too little of it. Everybody is repressed as hell and sex is the answer.”

“Yes! Best comment I’ve heard all day,” Annalise says, jumping into the fray. “I mean just think about the last time you had great sex. Or if you’re a virgin, imagine having sex with your crush. It’s just too good. Is that controversial? I really don’t think so. Sex is fun. It’s the highlight of my day. Why wouldn’t we want people to have sex each other? Especially when we’re in college. Now’s the time and place for it, so we might as well get as much of it as possible.”

Somehow, you’re not surprised that Annalise is the one to make this comment.

“But aren’t you concerned about the problems when sex goes wrong?” Charmaine asks, indignant. “What happens if somebody gets pregnant?”

“I don’t know if you know, but it’s not that hard to use birth control,” Annalise says, and the class snickers. “Anyways, we’re about to hit a demographic cliff. I say bring on the sex and bring on the babies!”

“That’s bold, very bold,” the professor says. There’s a wide smile on his face. He always enjoys these conversations an awful lot. “We’ve heard from a couple voices now, so let’s get somebody new. Brooke? What do you have to say?”

The shy girl is taken aback at being cold called, but she quickly gathers herself, putting down her pen.

“I thought the Freshman 15 would be a good thing at first, for the reasons Lucille and Annalise were saying,” she says. “But now I’m not sure. The Freshman 15 is just a bit of an unrealistic standard. I don’t think most people have sex with fifteen people in their life. But now there’s suddenly this expectation that you’re supposed to do it with fifteen people during your time in college, and, I don’t know, I guess I think most people are going to miss the mark. But all you’ll hear about is the guys who did it, and that seems like it can make most guys feel kinda inadequate. And on the other side, girls are pressured into having sex when maybe they don’t want it, which is a whole thorny issue… so yeah. I think I’m against it. It’s a meme from a movie that was fun in the context of the movie, but probably shouldn’t have made it out here into the real world.”

“Thanks for sharing your thoughts,” the professor says, nodding along. “Lisa? Last time you had something to say about how our media’s infiltrating our minds. Maybe Brooke’s comments about how this movie has leaked into the real world has inspired you?”

“Sure, I think the influence of mass media matters when you’re asking a question about the big things, things like Sex and Love. This is about the Freshman 15, though. Like Brooke said, it’s just a silly meme from a movie. It’s a passing fad. It’s inconsequential in the grand scheme of things. There’ll be something to take its place next month, and everyone will have moved on. That sums up my perspective about it. It’s as important as anything that blows up in pop culture for a day, or the latest outrage in the culture wars. We can bicker about it, but seriously, can’t we do better?”

Lisa stares at the professor, who welcomes the critique with applause.

“Bravo, bravo, it takes guts to come at the teacher like that,” he says. “Dissent is, of course, highly welcome. But rest assured, Lisa, there’s a method to this madness.”

Your sister shrugs, looking unimpressed. Attention soon moves to the other students in the room, who all give their takes. Eventually, it comes to be your turn too, and you give a lukewarm answer that plays to both sides. After all, like the Freshman 15 would suggest, there’s no reason to commit yet.

As class wraps up, you find yourself thinking about lunch, when Lisa gets your attention.

“Want to get lunch with me? Rachel just asked and I think Griffin’s going to be there,” she says.

{if GriffRach > 49} “Don’t want to third wheel? I get it,” you say. “‘Course I’ll join.” {else} “Ouch, this isn’t a one person job. I’ll come with,” you say. {endif}