Emma must take a drugs test

'Well, Miss Emma,' the first cop said, 'the good news is that you don't seem to be carrying any weapons or contraband.' The second cop turned her around to face them both, with her bottom now pressed against the side of the patrol car. Emma was relieved at his words, and at no longer having her asshole exposed to the street, but now she was again standing naked in front of anybody walking past.

The cop continued speaking. 'But we do have you, so far, on charges of public disorder, affray, and now public indecency. You are now exposing yourself to police officers and members of the public.' Emma wanted to protest, but kept her mouth shut for fear of making this worse. 'Therefore I must ask you, Miss Emma, are you under the influence of any controlled substances?'

'No, of course not!' Emma protested. 'I was attacked!'

'Yes, you said,' the cop seemed tired all of a sudden. 'We are going to have to test you for drugs,' he said. 'But you are in luck. I highly experienced in drug testing, and we can settle this question now, with your consent. Or, we can hold you at the station and wait five days for the results of the lab tests.'

Emma obviously didn't want to spend five days in the station. 'Yes, let's do it now,' she insisted.

'Very well,' replied the cop. 'Have you taken any drugs orally in the past few days?'

'No.'

'Very well, open your mouth please.'

Emma did as she was told and the cop stepped closer. Instead of looking in her mouth as she expected, he gripped her face and kissed her hard. His lips pressed against hers and his tongue filled her mouth for what seemed like ages. When he pulled back she gasped, asking 'what was that?'

'I told you I am experienced at this,' the cop smiled. 'You'll be pleased to learn that I was unable to taste any evidence of controlled substances. Now for the next test.'

The other cop turned her around again and bent her over the corner of the car.

'Tell me, Miss Emma,' the first one continued, 'have you taken any drugs vaginally or anally in the past few days?'

'No! No I haven't!' she exclaimed as he knelt down behind her, gripping her buttocks.