The Life's Parodies

When Andreas arrived to his gate, it was busted open already, and there were a few police cars at his drive way. The blue uniforms were swarming the place, and there was even a tape set up to prevent anyone from entering behind that gate line.

Sally got there a few seconds later, looking exhausted after a relatively short sprint.

"What's going on, officer?"

Andreas asked the one police man that was standing in front of the yellow tape. It was clear that this guy did not feel well in his uniform, and kept looking left and right nervously, like it was his first day on the job.

"I recommend you move along, sir. It's a dangerous area."

Sally slid closer, making the cop step back.

"It's his house! And I live in there too."

"Yeah, I believe I have a right to know what's going on at my house."

Andreas also stepped forward, and being by no means a small man, he too indimidated the guy in the uniform.

"Umm... There was a break in..."

"Be quiet, Jones."

The new voice stepped into the conversation.

It belonged to a tall, blonde lady in a skirt and a grey jacket. She looked over thirty, was smoking and looked like she could knock out just about anyone in the vicinity just with her deadly eyes.

"You, are you the owner of this house?"

The sharp voice was directed at Andreas.

"I am, yes. Andreas Voigt"

"Good. I'm detective Malone. For how long were you out of the house?"

She tossed the cigarette to the ground and stomped it with her shoe.

"For an hour. Maybe more."

He said, looking at his watch, but not remembering when exactly they left.

"Alright. We have a very peculiar situation in here and we might need your assistance."

"What is going on?" The Lamia asked.

"And you are...?"

"Sally. His, um, roommate."

Detective measured Sally with her eyes.

"You're one hell of a roommate then. Anyway - Mr Voigt, did you leave anyone at your home when you were gone?"

He scratched his head.

"Well, Sally has a guest. Someone that is also not from this world."

Malone sighed.

"That explains a lot. We got a call about twenty minutes ago that there was a break in and robbery at your house, Mr Voigt."

"Illy knows how to use a phone?" Sally asked, confused.

"I assume Illy is the name of your guest?"

The Lamia nodded.

"Well, the phone call wasn't from her. It was done by - and please don't laugh - burglars."

"What?"

Andreas raised his head, not believing what was going on.

"Look, here are the facts. A group of people broke in to your house, and got themselves captured by your guest. One of them managed call us before getting his phone destroyed. We are currently negotiating with her, but she refuses to recognize our authority over the situation."

The detective spread her arms helplessly. It was clear that she was tired of this event already and wanted to come back to the precinct.

Andreas just looked at Sally, biting his lip and holding back the laughter. The Lamia didn't find it funny, she was more likely concerned about her friend.

"I'll go and talk to her."

She decided.

Detective Malone went with her towards the doors. Andreas stayed in the back, and observed. His front yard was a mess, gate has been broken down, cameras destroyed. He also saw a purple paint sprayed on one of the windows. Voigt realized that it wasn't just a simple burglary. Whoever did it wanted to do damage to the property, perhaps a hate act towards him or his friend.

A few minutes later Andreas saw the front doors opening, and Illy walking out to hug Sally. Several officers went into the house and came back with four tightly binded man.

Detective Malone approached him once more.

"Glad that's over." She sighed, and pulled out another cigarette. "You smoke?"

"No, thanks." He shook his head. "Long day?"

"You could say that." She lighted up the smoke and took a long puff, before releasing the poison out of her lungs to the world again. "I'd love to say that these things don't happen and it's the first time, but..."

"But you've seen enough of it to not say things like that." Andreas smiled.

She smiled. Voigt couldn't help but recognize that she had a beautiful smile.

'You're alright, Andreas. Here is my number. Give me a call sometimes."

She gave him her business card that also had her private phone on it scribbled with a pen, and then proceeded to leave. The card said her full name was Monica Malone.

Andreas stood there with the number, confused about the ordeal. He did not even consider the fact that women might still be interested in him.