Pointlessly Annoying Puzzles

Yuri carefully moved around the room carefully; he made sure to find the most optimal path around all the furniture so that he could make it to the stone doors and see what they could have on them. Yuri made his way through the maze and found himself at the door on the right first; it was blank, if you excluded the basic carving of a pair of goblets; turning around, on the other door was the carving of a wine bottle. Whoever set up hints was far more annoying than he had anticipated. Usually, puzzles weren’t this pointlessly frustrating.

Yuri gave a groan of annoyed frustration before crying out a bit too loudly, “Whoever designed this puzzle was a Massive Dick!” Suddenly the door with a wine bottle on it slid to the left as it opened. “Seriously!? Seems even puzzle designers like to troll people, and not in a fun way.” He stepped into the next chamber, this one was noticeably smaller with seeming to be around 30 feet on all sides.

The room itself was pretty barren, save for the blue podium at the centur of the room with something red upon it, a closed metal door with no handle or keyhole was on the opposite side of the room from where he had entered. Yuri approached the podium, upon it was a red tome with big onyx letters saying “Do Not Read” with no other context. Yuri was not amused, wanting to vent some of his frustration from the prior room, Yuri picked up the book and just threw it at teh door. Surprisingly, the door opened and the book magically returned to the podium before a set of numbers counting down from 30 appeared in the space where the door had been. Not wanting to find out when the timer hit zero with him in his current room, Yuri rushed out of the chamber into the next room.

The next room was a 50 by 45 room with a 4o-foot ceiling. The room was decorated with lavish blue and green cloths of some kind, the floor and walls seemed to be crafted of black marble, and a set of wooden thrones were on the other side of the room that had a closed stone door with no adornments that to their right. The thrones seemed to be a composite of white oak and ebony wood, with a plush violet cloth adorning where it was indicated where one would sit.

With a cooler and calmer head, Yuri brought himself to face the thrones and gave a courteous bow, which triggered no response. Yuri muttered a comment about having to do something so stereotypically funny under his breath before reassuming the proper stance before reorienting his legs to a slight cross, before performing his best impression of a curtsey. This actually did cause the door to open for him.