The Accident

Dirk walked outside, pondering. Not paying attention to his surroundings, he bumped into another gentleman.

"What the fuck dude?"

"Fuck you." Dirk put up his middle finger.

"Get the fuck out of my face before I rock your shit, so what the fuck?"

Confusingly, the man got closer and closer.

"Yeah, well fuck you. I'll mess you up. I'm a junkyard dog!" Dirk said. He began to bark. Preparing himself to fight, he pulled his shirt off. Unfortunately for Dirk, he stumbled backwards and tripped down the cement steps.

"Oh fuck"

"Call an ambulance" Dirk whimpered. The man ran away, afraid of an insurance scam or an **** charge.

Dirk woke up on a massage table. Candles surrounded him.

"Did I fucking die?"

"Are you stupid?" The woman said, in a light accent. It was Salma freakin' Hayek, dressed in a bathrobe.

"yeah" Dirk said, ashamed.

"Well don't worry, I'm going to massage you back to perfect health."

She put oil onto her hands, and slowly caressed Dirk's body. She worked her way up from his feet, to his legs, to his butt. Her soft hands worked on all of his muscles. Dirk moaned as she rubbed his back and neck.

"You've got a nice ass, shame about the rest of you".

Feeling Salma Hayek, and watching her small, curvy body sway under the bathrobe made his cock grow erect. Dirk knew what was coming next.

"Alright, turn around."

"As you wish"

He turned around, revealing his massive erection.

"Dios Mio" Salma Hayek said, her mouth wide open. After her agent had dragged this man off of the street and stripped him, she didn't expect him to have such a massive cock.

"I think another part of me needs a massage" Dirk said, a line he had be told not to use at the last massage parlour he went to.

She took a condom out and rolled it over his cock. After it was down she lubed up her hands and started jerking Dirk's cock with expertise. Her hands worked their way up and down his shaft.

"That's a really nice dick."

She stopped jerking, and pulled her robe off, revealing her exquisitely large tits and perfect brown nipples. Her pussy was covered in a dark brown bush. She straddled Dirk, letting her tits hang over him as she lovingly massaged his cock.

With one hand, she rubbed him fast, and with the other, she cradled his balls.

"Are you going to cum for me?"

"The dice said I had to cum on myself"

Salma Hayek pulled the condom off. Dirk now felt her soft hands on his hard cock. Watching as this latina MILF vigorously rubbed him, he felt the orgasm within him build. Her tits bounces as her hands frantically rubbed his cock.

"Cum for me."

"Fuck" Dirk couldn't hold back any longer and came all over his own body. It was a huge load.

Salma Hayek grabbed wipes, and began cleaning him up. She kissed his nipple.

"For good luck."

Dirk nodded, not fully understanding what was going on.

"That was great guys." Salma Hayek's agent emerged from behind the curtain.

"You, whatever your name is. We're filming a porn with Jennifer Lawrence. Are you interested?"