Cop Stereotypes

Picking up his pencil Xander paused before he tried to tilt thing into his favor. He had to write something... something that would make the cops outside the door not arrest him for banging a bimbo- who had a screaming orgasm- in a coffee shop bathroom. The obvious was to make sex in public not a big deal... but thinking back on it there was a part of him that really kind of got off on the fact that he had been fucking a slut in a public bathroom in an almost full coffee shop. So what could he do... he could change the rules for these particular cops so that they wouldn't arrest him. More than he already he had.

New Rule: Sgt. Nakai and Officer McKay are a classic odd couple cop duo. Nakai is a seen everything getting close to retirement Murtaugh type. McKay is a young and wild, break the rules Riggs type. A young hot Nympho in McKay and an experienced Cougar in Nakai. Who enforce their own brand of justice on the streets of Sunnydale.

Xander had to stop and check his work. He'd forgotten about Cougars. How could he have forgotten about Cougars? M.i.l.f.'s kind of sorta represented Cougars if you squinted a bit. But it just wasn't the same. The fantasy of an older woman taking a younger man as a lover and teaching him how to be a perfect lover was one of his favorite fantasies. That may or may not have starred Ms. Calender and Missus Summers on occasion. Granted Missus Summers was a M.i.l.f. of the highest order but that didn't mean she also couldn't be a Cougar.

Well there was now way he could let that gaff stand.

Old Rule: There is a fifth type of insatiable woman, The Cougar. These older women are in their sexual prime and seek out younger partners. The Cougar, more than any other type of insatiable woman, is able to sense the sexual potential in a Layer and will actively pursue a sexual relationship with a Layer.

Xander stared at the Rulebook and was suddenly wondering what else he hadn't written down. What other type of woman hadn't he included? What other type of woman had he fantasized about but no included?

Well, there was his She Hulk, Powergirl, Big Barda, Xena fantasies... and that one bodybuilder chick who was in Double Impact and did some Hercules episodes... Corina Everson? Ever-something? Plus there was Brigitte "Red Sonja" Nielsen and all the ladies on American Gladiator Warrior women, how had he forgotten about them?

Old Rule: There is a sixth type of insatiable woman, The Amazon. These women are known for their warrior spirit and their great physical strength and size. Amazons normally are over six feet tall and usually they are distinctly muscular while maintaining their feminine curves. Amazon's are known for their voracious sexual needs and direct nature in propositioning lovers, often bordering on dragging people off to have sex with them regardless of their partner's willingness.

Old Rule: All women are bi-sexual. Attracted to men and women. Some may prefer one over the other but both sexes are attractive to women.

What was hotter than one woman? Two women. Hotter still was two women doing things to one another. Who could get mad about that? Outside of homophobes.... Fuck that, homophobia was stupid. Well, he could get rid of that in an eyeblink.

Old Rule: Homophobia no longer exists.

Xander nodded his head and started to wonder what else he should write when there was a knock at the door again.

"You okay in there, kid?" Sgt. Nakai asked. "You seem to be taking a little while."

Xander damn near slapped himself. He forgot about the cops with his fantasizing about two chicks being together. He reviewed what he'd written about the cops and decided to make one little change. He erased one word and rewrote it. Turning McKay from a Nympho into an Amazon.

"You two aren't fucking in there again, are you?" McKay demanded. "Now's not the time to try and eek out a quickie."

Xander snorted at that idea. He looked at Debbi and she still was zonked out there was no way he was getting her to go another round. There was no way she was going to be doing anything. Xander groaned. Anything like getting dressed and talking to the cops. If she was going to get dressed he was going to have to dress her. Or let the cops in and get them to help him dress her.