Overthinking again

Grace did take a moment to reply to you after you had essentially spilled your guts, considering your words and responding when it felt like she had come up with something to help you.

“So what are your full intentions with Jess? I’m not asking that to say you should fully commit to your plans but I just want to know what you are thinking” Grace asked, her curiosity sounding genuine.

“...I’m not fully sure yet. If we do add her to the group then I guess I’d treat her the same as everyone else. I’d make sure she was looked after and I’d spend time with her, one on one and with the others in a group. Go on dates, invite her around to see everyone and yeah, we’d have fun together” you replied, letting the idea of the next few months play out in your head.

“So you’d see her both romantically and sexually?” Grace questioned.

“Yeah, of course,” you quickly replied.

“Why? Don’t get me wrong, Jess is a lovely girl, along prickly around the edges sometimes, but why are you trying to plan out what seems like your whole life together when you haven’t even done anything together yet? What Emma wants is to see you sleep with people and if Sarah wanted you to get along with Jess then well, you’ve already done that. You got her to actually sit and talk with you which seemed a lot better than how things started earlier.

You can just fuck someone and leave it at that, you know? And if you don’t, you are gonna have a really hard time getting through college without you and Emma coming back home with 50 other versions of Jess. My point being, care only what you need to care about and just have fun with everything else. You can be more selfish. Much more in your case.” Grace explained, speaking for just as long as you had but her words felt a lot more convincing than the ramble you had spilled earlier.

Your first thought was to deny only having a sexual relationship with someone but at the motion of how things would play out in college, you realised she was right. If things kept going as they were now, you, Emma and Sarah were bound to run into a tonne of girls you would like to be with and if you had the intention of being in a committed relationship with all of them, you were bound to just fall apart at the seams.

Even if the KDK would help you keep track of everything, it was you who was more attached to the romantic side of the relationship than the sexual side. The KDK itself was mostly focused on a partner's kinks and that was basically all sexual, even letting you know that Jessica was into orgasm denial before you had even gone to kiss her.

You considered Grace’s words and the thought of you being more selfish seemed to be a recurring theme when you had these more meaningful conversations about yourself. It felt hard to put yourself first when you now had 7 subjects to deal with but Grace was right and your way of thinking was bound to get harder if you went to 8 or more until it would become impossible, and you had already gone to 7 subjects in only the first couple of weeks that you had had the app on your phone.

Be more selfish…

The car stopped at the next red light and you reached over and placed one of your hands on Grace’s tits, getting some side eye from her in return before you gave them a quick squeeze.

“If this is what you need to be more selfish then be my guest” Grace replied, giving you the go-ahead to do what you wanted.

She went to turn back but while you saw the light was still red, you moved your other hand up to rest on the back of her head and pulled her in for a kiss. This time it seemed to genuinely take her by surprise as she didn’t react first but she did quickly return your affection, kissing you back just as hard while the car stayed still.

Your tongue parted her lips and you would have both continued without a care in the world but a beep from the car behind made you both separate.

You looked up to see the light was now green and Grace, looking flustered, raised an arm to give them some sort of hand signal in apology before getting the car going again.

“Okay now I’ll also let you do that but try to not do that while I’m driving” she added, the blush still on her cheeks with a smile that looked like it would never go away.

“So I can still grope you anytime then? Got it” you responded, putting your hand back on her chest.

“Just don’t go too far, neither of us wants to get into an accident. Especially with you having this realisation for yourself” Grace said, continuing to give you permission.

The fact that Grace was letting you do this, and happily as well, meant that what she was saying had some truth to it. You hadn’t thought that just doing what you wanted would have this sort of effect over her but she genuinely seemed to enjoy giving in to you. It sounded obvious that she would like it once you had actually tried it but at the time it felt like you had been afraid of her reaction if you actually did anything.

Her warning about her driving was a valid one however, so you just stuck to keeping your hand on her tit and giving it only the occasional squeeze, just something to make you feel like you had the situation under your control.

It was almost a relaxing experience as well, being able to just live by your whims was something you rarely did and while you knew your usual anxiety would creep back in when something rocked the boat, you were happy to start trying this new approach for the moment.

“So what other selfish things would you like to do? Other than this that is” Grace joked, puffing out her chest to emphasise your point.

You had to actually mull over the question while you tried to come up with something. You would already say you were being pretty selfish given your current circumstances, especially with the KDK but you knew Grace wouldn’t accept that answer.

Your thoughts ended up going back to the kiss you just shared with Grace and given that you hadn’t been able to spend any intimate time with Rebecca at the gym earlier, you ended up blurting out the first thing you could think of.

“I want to kiss everyone at the meal tomorrow” you said, the desire sounding small when you said it out loud.

“Great!” Grace replied, sounding more enthusiastic than you had expected.